lately I feel like all I do is yell at my 4.5 yr old...anything i say she does the opposite...I have to constantly repeat myself....like this morning I asked her 4 times to sit in her carseat and ended up screaming my head off to the point that I had a headache and then she finally sat down. I then feel so guilty b/c I work FT and I don't want to spend the little time I have with her screaming...I've tried asking nicely and giving warnings but she doesn't seem to care. She seems to be good at school and for my parents and MIL who watch her during the week....I'm just at a loss. Anybody else feeling like all they do is yell?
Re: I feel like all I do is yell at her...
Yes, I can feel myself getting out of control. I just feed right off of DS. I often have to take a step back and calm myself down because I find the yelling, many times, only makes the whole situation worse. I have found staying calm and being consistent with time outs to be helpful. DS knows that if I have to ask him to do something three times, it's a time out.
Now, that's obviously easier said than done, but it's what I strive for.
Yes, and I'm currently reading How to Behave So Your Preschooler Will Too.
I find myself yelling a lot when I'm interrupting his play/tv time to get him to do something. The book addresses that what looks like misbehavior often times is the preschooler's brain difficulty breaking away from what they are engaged in. They suggest that instead of me asking a million times that he puts on his shoes, and then ending up yelling at him when he doesn't comply, that I go over to him, touch him to get his attention and ask him to put them on. Maybe even give him a choice of shoes to engage him.
I notice when I engage him, I have to yell less. It's harder on me because I wish he'd just get his damn shoes on...lol. But it seems to help a bit.
1-2-3 Magic helped a lot too.
DD1 turned 4.5 yesterday and I feel the same way you do today. It's more frustrating for me when I KNOW she's capable of something but just chooses not to do it. The time change may have something to do with it, as both my girls have been off and overtired.
I've started telling her that I'm not going to ask anymore but we have XX minutes before we need to leave and she needs to be ready. I'll touch her, look her in the eye, and confirm she understands. If she's not ready she will either not go to her fun activity or lose a privledge at the end of the day.
TTC #3: BFP 4/27/12, Ectopic 5/16/12 Expectant Management, 8/15/12 Cleared to TTC
BFP 9/25/12 EDD 6/6/13, Shooting 3-for-3 from the line: It's a Girl
PgAL/PAL Welcome
Yes my DD who is just slightly younger than yours is the same way, I also work full time and I don't want to be yelling at her all the time. I really don't have any advice just to say I sympathize.
I was really hoping that 4 was going to be more controlled! 3 is/was very tough!!