I need serious HELP!

July_2009 · March 2013

I am sorry if this comes off as intense, but pardon my hormones, I am dealing with a 3.5 yr old ASD and a newborn. My 3.5 yr old is in public school preschool with an IEP. He had been diagnosed with PPD-NOS over 1.5 yrs ago.

No matter what we do (parents), DS will not co-operate with us at home or listen to us. Major tantrums over EVERY thing. We are quite aware of his struggles with the lack of play and social skills. But what gives?! We tried many different ways to engage him at home, keep doing things he is interested in, tried the son-rise method as per a teacher's recommendation, do picture schedules, activity schedules as per his school's recommendation, but nothing seems to work and I am really about to tear my hair apart. I of late find losing it and screaming at him and sadly, he has learnt to scream back. I just don't want to scar him by this screaming in hormonal rage, but for God's sake, the kid will switch lights on and off, throw things on the floor, open and close doors and just bang into things ALL.THE.TIME. He does not engage with us in play or do anything we try to help him with.

What am I doing wrong?, I know there is no magic pill answer on the web to help my DS, but PLEASE point me in one direction to start with. Should I see a behaviour psychologist for him, who can help me make our family's life more sane. I am totally spent with juggling a newborn and older DS and the sleeplessness. I just want a solution. Which book to read, who to consult, where to start.

After a 1.5 yrs of diagnosis, I thought I had some clue on how to deal with a kid on ASD, but here I am ....I have NO CLUE...

landon15 · March 2013

I also wonder if the school has offered you a behaviorist to work with? I work as a therapist with children with ASD for a private company, but I do know that some schools will consider sending home a therapist/assistant of some sort to work with your child while they are home to help with play skills/self help skills ect. It sounds as if your child doesn't KNOW how to independtly play and keep himself busy. Perhaps a box of toys such as Mr. Potato Head, Puzzles, Peg Boards,Pop Beads might be nice to have for him to play with when you need to keep him busy.(you may need to teach him how to use these toys) Also, OT is a great place to start (again school should assist with this, seek them out). I would take some time(I know how overwhelming this can be and time consuming) to do a little bit of research of what kind of services your son qualifies for and take advantage of them and then some! Also, continue to follow through with consequences and be consistant. You can google some Gross Motor tasks that you can also teach him to do that will provide him with some sensory input that he may be seeking. Good Luck!

July_2009 · March 2013

Thanks for your reply and suggestions. DS was diagnosed at children's specialized by a Dev Pedi and his team. At the follow up a year later, the Dev pedi said DS made lot of improvements and to keep on with the therapies.

DS has been in EI for low muscle tone, late walking (no walking at 18 months), OT for sensory issues, texture issues. At his current public school he was in a self contanied ABA classroom for 6 months and the teachers then moved him to a PSD classroom for 1/2 day becoz he is showing lot of improvements and wants to socialize with his peers. DS is verbal but pretty much scripted talk, rote phrases from TV shows etc.

I already bought the kindle version of the books Auntie suggested, they should be good reads during my night sessions with the newborn. I have heard of floortime method too and have reached out to a couple of floortime therapists in the area, hopefully they will help. My OT suggested aquatic OT therapy would be good for my DS and additional ABA hours at home.

At school, he does get speech 2x/week (diad), OT 2x/week and the remaining ABA hours and then he goes to PSD class for the remainder of the day. But they have not offered any behaviourist help for DS. I am in constant touch with his teachers and have communicated the issues at home. But I will ask them if I can get a behaviourist help.

Thanks for the direction ladies, this means a lot to me.

AngelMommy11211 · March 2013

I'm glad you're getting ABA and services. I had 2 more by the time my son was 4 and its a tough transistion. He has PDD as well. Other than the advice given here, I just wanted to say it has gotten better for us. We did in home ABA and that's been super helpful. He is 5 1/2 now and I wouldn't want to go back to the 3s ever! Things are much better now. Still some struggles, but not as many and the communication and maturity has gotten better. Hang in there mama. Getting a new sibling is a hard transistion for them and makes our patience harder to maintain with all the hormones!

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