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XP: Leaving LO overnight

ChristyMLChristyML
in Babies: 9 - 12 Months

My husband's and my anniversary is in August. It will only be our second one, but we want to start a tradition of him taking the day of, and the day before or after our anniversary off, and we'd go spend those two days alone together and stay in a hotel for a night. Last year it was fine, since I was about 32 weeks pregnant, but now, I'm worried about DS. He'll be about 10.5 months when we'd plan to leave him with my mom (he knows her almost as well as he knows me and DH. She's his third favorite person lol).

Have any of you left your baby overnight with someone other than DH yet? Any tips for how to make it easier on all of us, including my mom? We sometimes co-sleep, but I don't know if DS will be completely sleeping on his own by August. I know that it is early to be thinking of this, but just in case I need to somehow prepare DS and/or my mom and/or myself months in advance, I think maybe it is a good time to post this.

 

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Re: XP: Leaving LO overnight

  • denaebdenaeb member

    We have left DD twice overnight (once when she was 9 months and once when she was almost 11 months).  The first time was with my parents and the second with my sister (she loves them all and knows them REALLY well).  Both times she was sick so it didn't help, but she was fine otherwise.  I think I had a harder time with her being gone than she did!  I would recommend a couple trial sleepovers first, when you are near by so if something comes up you can be there.  Also, make sure your mom is very familiar with his schedule, and write it down for her anyway.  It will go a lot smoother if she knows what he is expecting to happen at certain times.

    Hope that helps! 

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  • meglette417meglette417 member
    My mom took LO for the first time when he was about 6 months just for the night to let us get some rest.  Truthfully she left our house at 10 and then we saw him at 1 so it wasn't super long and we went to bed right away so it wasn't that I didn't miss him but we basically just slept the whole time we weren't around him.  It did feel a little weird but it was nice to have some sleep and just us time.  I think he might have slept in bed with my mom that night too.  My guess is by 10.5 months all of you will be pretty fine especially if she is around often.  Your only problem will be missing him, just have her send you pictures throughout the day and you will be fine.
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  • lindslalalalindslalala member
    We have left DS with my mom probably 4 different times and once with my MIL. Tips to make it easier: make sure your mom is familiar with LO's routine, it makes it easier on everyone. I would say try to get DS sleeping on his own, because the 1st time we left our DS with my mom he was still occasionally co-sleeping and he flipped out when my mom tried to bring him into bed after he woke up in the middle of the night. The first time you leave them is hard. Like, really hard. But it's good for them and good for you. Good luck!
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  • cattyninecattynine member

    We've left DD for a weekend at 6 months and a few nights around Christmas. I don't really find it that hard emotionally (does that make me sound cold?). DD knows my mom really well and she is a great sleeper.

    The fact that you co-sleep could be the biggest thing to overcome.  I like the pp suggestion to do some trial nights between now and August. Do you live close to your mom? Even if you went and stayed there for a night, it would help her see your evening routine and how things go in the morning.

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  • AliciaS1411AliciaS1411 member

    DH and I went on an 8 day cruise when LO was 5 months. He did great! He slept in a PNP in MIL's room. We took his jumper and swing, and we left 3 shirts each that we had worn around the house so he'd have our "smell." We also made some short little videos and put them on FB for MIL to play for him. I wrote out a word doc that had his schedule, what his different cries meant, and emergency numbers. It was hard for us because we were out of the country and couldn't call home or be contacted at all. We just had to trust that MIL knew what she was doing and everything would be ok. And it definitely was! We wouldn't hesitate to do it again. 

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  • chloebeth930chloebeth930 member
    I would suggest having your mom stay at your house with your LO. That way their routine won't be too mixed up.

    FWIW, I have left DD home overnight with my mom. We Facetimed with her but honestly she couldn't care less that we weren't home with her haha.
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  • ChristyMLChristyML
    imageAliciaS1411:

    DH and I went on an 8 day cruise when LO was 5 months. He did great! He slept in a PNP in MIL's room. We took his jumper and swing, and we left 3 shirts each that we had worn around the house so he'd have our "smell." We also made some short little videos and put them on FB for MIL to play for him. I wrote out a word doc that had his schedule, what his different cries meant, and emergency numbers. It was hard for us because we were out of the country and couldn't call home or be contacted at all. We just had to trust that MIL knew what she was doing and everything would be ok. And it definitely was! We wouldn't hesitate to do it again. 

    All I have to say is holy crap. You are incredibly brave! I'm glad everything went well for you!

    To those of you asking about where my mom lives....we live with her for the time being, and we will still be with her when we leave two hours away for our anniversary trip....You guys seem to have had it tougher than me, so I feel like I'm just worried about nothing (I probably am, but I'd rather plan it out and worry about it, than have something hugely unexpected pop up kwim?).

    I'm definitely going to do the trial run, and definitely do some shirts that smell like me and DH. The video idea isn't bad either. Thanks ladies! 

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  • HollyBee013HollyBee013 member
    Our anniversary was 7 weeks after LO was born, and we had every intention of doing our best to celebrate!  LO has been staying out 1 night a month since then.  Sometimes with my mom, which DH and I both really feel more comfortable with, and sometimes with his.  She has always done great, but she has also been sleeping through the night since about 5 months, so that always helps!  Both grandmas follow our night time routine, which I think helps, and we always take her noise box and night lite, so maybe that helps too.  She sleeps in a pack n play in their rooms, and hasnt seemed to have a problem.  With that said, she will not take naps over there.  I dont know if the darkness of the rooms at night make a difference, but during the day, she wont sleep anywhere but in her room or in the car. 
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  • skibunny59skibunny59 member
    We've left DD overnight with  my parents 3 times.  The first time she was 6 months old.  (She's now 11 months.)  We cosleep and DD likes to comfort nurse at night.  I was super nervous about leaving her the first time but she slept really well.  My parents put the pack and play in their bedroom and DD slept in there just fine.  She only woke up once and my mom was able to put her back to sleep with the bottle.  My mom watches DD while I'm at work so DD knows my mom really well and loves her.  I think your mom and DS will be just fine.  Enjoy your night out with your husband!
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  • wntrgrl83wntrgrl83

    Ahhh! I have yet to leave them overnight--- it must be me! I just feel like I'm not ready to take that step... lol..

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  • laurakaz13laurakaz13 member

    We've left DD at least a dozen times overnight with my parents and in-laws.  We've taken two 7-10 day trips w/o her as well. 

    As long as you have someone you trust taking care of LO, just relax and go spend alone time with your husband.  It clearly doesn't bother me and DH.  We flew cross country for a wedding when DD was 9 weeks old. 

    We just truly trust my parents, they are wonderful with DD, and she loves them.  You will be fine for one night.  It's so worth it.   

    I'm always the odd mama out in these types of posts.  I can't imagine not having nights alone with DH for years.  I miss DD terribly, but DH nand I love our nights away together and we love to travel.  When DD is old enough she will travel with us, but until then I guess we are truly lucky to have such great parents who love to keep DD. 

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  • tarajaynetarajayne member
    LO's are with mom and dad tonight and this is I think the 4th time they have had them overnight.  This time we let them stay 2 nights.  I miss them like crazy but they have so much fun!  And this is the only way DH and I can get work done on the house we are putting on the market.
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