Disheartened

CierraSimone · March 2013

First Post When I think about my current situation, I can't help but to be in a state of disbelief. I am 8 weeks pregnant and the father of my child is choosing not to be a part of the baby's life. I've never envisioned baring my first child w/o the father, and certainly never imagined him not wanting to be a part of its life. This man is not a stranger, we were together. I was there for him and his daughter for over a year. He pretty much is a single father because the mother of his child chooses her bar career to be more important than parenting her baby. He says he can't handle another baby right now, and would like for me to "wait until his daughter is 4". It's a little too late for that. He is upset that I won't get rid of it, and I believe he has changed his number, which is ridiculous because I have other ways to contact him. I just can't fathom the idea of a man taking care of one child, and feeling so against having the other one. I'm heartbroken by this but nonetheless excited about this wonderful blessing! I pray that for the sake of my child he comes to his senses. Words of encouragement anyone? Thanks:

Sheenafontenot · March 2013

Your story is so similar to mine it's scary. I am 8 weeks pregnant and just told the father I am keeping this baby. This will be a first baby for both of us and he insists he isn't ready. This morning he told me he wants this over by Saturday and then we can go our separate ways! I can't imagine not wanting to be part of your child's life and I too never imagined I would be in this situation. Blessings come in disguise though. My mother raised me alone and I didn't have a relationship with my father and I don't think I suffered really. My mom was great and so will you and I. Try to stay positive because you are strong and you have support all around you.

kennazebrowsky · March 2013

Sorry to hear this for both of you. It will be a hard road but it is possible to raise a child without the "sperm donor" . Surround yourselves with family and close friends.

File for child support and a paternity test as soon as you can. Good luck! I am sure you will be great mommies.

CierraSimone · March 2013

Yes you're right I do have a lot of support around me, something he doesn't have! We are both strong and though I'm not looking forward to doing this by myself, I anticipate it being all worth it! Plain and simple these men are cowards. If you can lay up and create a child, you need to be man enough to take care of one! Ill pray for the both of them because they seem out of tune with reality and its sad. What makes them think abortion is the only option? Oh well more for mommy to love! We'll be just fine!

CierraSimone · March 2013

Yes I most certainly will be filing for child support. What makes me so mad is that he willingly takes care of his daughter. It is not my fault that the mother of his child, who has 2 other children btw, has left raising and nurturing their baby all on him to work at a bar. Common sense would tell you that being a single mother of 3 and working at the bar all day everyday is not the ideal job. But common sense isn't too common, obviously. Either way my baby and I won't suffer because of it. He will take responsibility!

inthelost · March 2013

that makes me mad and confused too that he's such a good dad to his daughter but wants nothing to do with his second child? I do not understand. I say just surround yourself with your friends and your loved ones and try not to depend on him for support. But stick with making sure he does take responsibility! You can't "pick and choose" when it comes to children!

CierraSimone · March 2013

Yes it confuses and makes me extremely upset as well because he is an excellent father to his daughter. But you're right there is no pick and choose when it comes to parenting, he most certainly will be held responsible.

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