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Question from a Dirty Lurker

Rae1105Rae1105 member
in Baby Showers

Hi Ladies.

 I am a dirty lurker all over the forums but I rarely ever post because all my questions are usually answered and work "frowns" upon forum posting. However I had a question for the ladies of this board. I am a single FTM and have absolutely no help/contact from the father or his family. My family, thank God, is very supportive and very helpful. My question is, would it be impolite or "bad taste" if I register for gender specific items as opposed to gender neutral? I am, obviously, not planning to have another child any time soon, I just haven't seen a question like this on here and want to get ya'lls opinion on the situation. If there has been a question, I am sorry to be THAT person! Thanks! 


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Re: Question from a Dirty Lurker

  • 526SadieSadie526SadieSadie member

    I'm not sure what your lack of contact with the father and his family has to do with it, but you can register for whatever colors you want to. 

    If you have another child of the opposite gender, I think you'll be happier already having gender neutral things like the swing/bouncer/high chair, etc.

    It's up to you.  Just know that having only all blue things is not an excuse to have a second shower if LO #2 is a girl, whenever you might have another baby.

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  • duffmakerduffmaker member

    Of course not! You can register for whatever you want :)

    People register for gender neutral "big" things (car seats, strollers, swings, bouncers, etc.) for a bunch of different reasons, they plan on having another child, or so it will be easy to re-sell, or in case the U/S was wrong, they want to be able to pass it along to someone else, etc.

    Proud babywearing, breastfeeding, vaccinating SAHM of 2U2!
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  • duffmakerduffmaker member
    image526SadieSadie:

    I'm not sure what your lack of contact with the father and his family has to do with it, but you can register for whatever colors you want to. 

    I think she was just trying to make it very very clear that she isn't planning to get KTFU, again, anytime soon.

    And yes, I agree with PPs... you don't get another shower when you do have another baby just because you don't have gender neutral stuff. So if you do plan on having another baby sometime in the next 5-10years (or whatever) and would like to not have to put out those big bucks for the big essentials then it would be smart to register for neutral stuff.

    Proud babywearing, breastfeeding, vaccinating SAHM of 2U2!
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  • AAA024AAA024

    imageMandJS:
    You can register for whatever you want. Just don't use the fact that you got all pink or all blue stuff as an excuse for why you "need" another shower if/whenever you have another kid.

    This. Nothing worse than seeing someone registered for the same shiit in different colors just because they didn't plan ahead.

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  • rhubarb123rhubarb123 member
    imageAAA024:

    imageMandJS:
    You can register for whatever you want. Just don't use the fact that you got all pink or all blue stuff as an excuse for why you "need" another shower if/whenever you have another kid.

    This. Nothing worse than seeing someone registered for the same shiit in different colors just because they didn't plan ahead.

    Yep, this.
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  • 1026pumpkin1026pumpkin member

    I don't think it's impolite to register for gender-specific items, the only thing I would caution you on is that if you found out the sex from an anatomy scan (vs. amnio or genetic testing), they are sometimes wrong.  It would stink to have a bunch of pricey items in pink for a boy.

    I personally prefer getting all the big items in gender-neutral colors and getting clothes, blankets, etc. in more gender-specific colors and patterns.  To each their own, though!  Register for what you like! 

    BabyFetus Ticker; Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
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  • Adrian H.Adrian H.
    My neighbor offered us some baby items that were passed from her boys before we knew our baby's gender.....we accepted.  We found out that we're having a girl but will still use all of the blue items that she passed along to us.  We did purchase gender a neutral stroller, bed sheets, towels and a few other things because they were on sale.  You might definitely consider getting gender neutral bigger items inthe event that you have another kiddo.  Gender neutral is also always great when giving items to family and friends!
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  • Rae1105Rae1105 member
    Thank you for all the answers! I should have been more specific I just wanted it to get it out there before I was away from the computer for awhile. The only reason I said anything about the father was to reiterate the point that this was a surprise and I have absolutely no intention of getting pregnant again until I am in a stable, permanent relationship. I am able to support myself and the baby and would never expect ANYONE to just buy me gifts or anything. My best friends and my mom are wanting to plan a shower and get going on the registry and are pushing for more "gender specific" things because of the aforementioned not getting KTFU again for quite awhile. Just didn't know the etiquette I guess. Thanks again ladies!

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