Am I Crazy?

Lhztih · March 2013

My MIL, FIL, and SIL are coming to visit and meet new baby May 31, along with SIL's two kids, 6 and 4. SIL has just asked DH if we would be willing to keep the kids overnight one night so she can have a night alone with her boyfriend, who lives out here. I can't believe she even asked; if baby comes on time she will be 3 weeks old. Is it normal to ask first time parents to babysit this soon after birth?

ordinary1 · March 2013

I would say no. At three weeks, you are still getting into a routine.

Schell2013 · March 2013

I would say no to a sleepover. That would be a lot.

bakerbarre00 · March 2013

Lol reminds me of my BIL. He and his wife always want us to watch their kids whenever we come visit them. Some people just never grow up....

ScottsdaleMama · March 2013

I find it rude that she even asked, but that's just me.

brrkrrs18 · March 2013

ScottsdaleMama:
I find it rude that she even asked, but that's just me.

Agreed! I would say hell no!

metzy144 · March 2013

brrkrrs18:
ScottsdaleMama:
I find it rude that she even asked, but that's just me.
 
 
Agreed!  I would say hell no!

I agree! She's the crazy one, not you.

tuffytiff · March 2013

The purpose of the trip is them coming to visit the new baby, not for you to babysit her children. A bit tacky of her to ask, you'll be exhausted! You're not crazy at all!

jesselayne8 · March 2013

Can't MIL and FIL watch her kids? Are they staying with you?

botanicalbliss · March 2013

ScottsdaleMama:
I find it rude that she even asked, but that's just me.

word.

CRLSMC2011 · March 2013

Like PPs said, absolutely He!! NO!! What is she thinking? Having 2 kids herself, you'd think she'd understand...how rude.

MrsJ723 · March 2013

ScottsdaleMama:
I find it rude that she even asked, but that's just me.

Yes I hope they're not planning to stay with you...

jerseygirl81 · March 2013

botanicalbliss:
ScottsdaleMama:
I find it rude that she even asked, but that's just me.
word. 

Absolutely. If anything, she should be offering you and your husband the night out.

bananers · March 2013

Agree with the others. Even just having overnight guests with a three week-old sounds overwhelming, let alone you having to watch a couple extra kids that aren't yours. I would say no. It was very rude of them to ask.

ktr722 · March 2013

I would definitely say that it is not a good idea. If your in-laws will be joining her on the visit, they should watch. I don't blame you one bit for saying no. If they were a little older, I'd say sure, but they are still young and need to be occupied.

BekW2009 · March 2013

brrkrrs18:
ScottsdaleMama:
I find it rude that she even asked, but that's just me.

Agreed! I would say hell no!

Same here! Your SIL has nerves.

MamaJules220 · March 2013

I would have lost my sh!t. I can't even imagine having the audacity to ASK that of you.

HZ2012 · March 2013

I agree with everyone else this is gonna be your time for people to help YOU out! Not to mention, your 3 week old doesn't need to be around young kids carrying germs if not necessary.

rsage53 · March 2013

to be honest...my first thought was Hell NO!

Then I read it again and still thought..no way! IF she insists that she needs a babysitter- are your MIL and FIL an option? I can't believe she would even ask you guys!

aanchor · March 2013

Umm, no. I can't believe she even asked you that.

TheyCalledHerKate · March 2013

I would say no. You will be focused on your newborn and getting the rest you need.

BeckyTheEngineer · March 2013

I would decline her request. It is pretty brazen to ask. But, I don't think it's crazy to imagine taking care of three kids at once. This will be my third baby (all under 3) and obviously I plan to take care of all of my kids. If she is thinking that she might put the kids to sleep (and you have room for that, and they are good sleepers at night, and if you have had good experiences watching the kids in the past) then I would probably entertain that idea.

LN1024 · March 2013

jerseygirl81:
botanicalbliss:
ScottsdaleMama:
I find it rude that she even asked, but that's just me.
word.
Absolutely. If anything, she should be offering you and your husband the night out.

Exactly this!

love.love · March 2013

I would definitely say no.

you could end up with a C-section or a really bad tear and not even be able to get around too well. I had a 3rd degree tear with one baby and I couldn't walk properly for weeks!

pearlsonthebeach · March 2013

metzy144:
brrkrrs18:
ScottsdaleMama:
I find it rude that she even asked, but that's just me.

Agreed! I would say hell no!
I agree! She's the crazy one, not you.

All of this. Usually when people come to visit the new baby, they are coming not only to be introduced to the newest family member, but also to offer the new parents support and help around the house.

Honestly, I find it ridiculous that she would even ask... it would be far more appropriate for her to ask if she could watch your LO so you and your H could have a night out together.... I would be so confused if someone asked me to babysit (no matter who it was) 3 weeks after giving birth.

Good luck with this! No you are NOT crazy.

Lhztih · March 2013

Thanks guys, glad to know its not just me.

For those who are curious, no one is staying with us. MIL/FIL are staying at their favorite hotel, and SIL+kids are staying with the boyfriend. We have a hunch she didn't want to ask her parents to babysit, as they dont quite know what to think about the boyfriend. This is a really new boyfriend, maybe two or three months, and none of us have met him as he lives out here in SoCal. I guess they met awhile ago when he went home for a visit, and have since started a long distance relationship. It's just awkward all around.

cmurray · March 2013

I would say uh hell no for being so rude by asking!

MommaG123 · March 2013

BIL & SIL, niece and my ILs all came to visit C when she was 3 weeks old. BIL & SIL left to go back home and left niece with my ILs (who were staying at our house) for a couple days and then they took my niece back home with them for a week.

So it was kind of the same but not really. I think it's weird that she just asked you to watch her kids.

MmW36 · March 2013

Lhztih:
Thanks guys, glad to know its not just me.
For those who are curious, no one is staying with us. MIL/FIL are staying at their favorite hotel, and SIL+kids are staying with the boyfriend. We have a hunch she didn't want to ask her parents to babysit, as they dont quite know what to think about the boyfriend. This is a really new boyfriend, maybe two or three months, and none of us have met him as he lives out here in SoCal. I guess they met awhile ago when he went home for a visit, and have since started a long distance relationship. It's just awkward all around.

I give up trying to write a nice response about this. I'm having a hormonal day and this made me feel angry. I don't think I should feel angry over this. Haha. So... Poof goes everything I just wrote. I will just say that she is being rude and inconsiderate. You will be tired and adjusting to life with your baby. Who knows when you will be able to have sex again-- why should you have to give up your special family bonding time so that she can get her booty call?

Blueyed228 · March 2013

I would tell her to get fvked.

hogrefea · March 2013

Blueyed228:
I would tell her to get fvked.

This was probably her plan...

Pumpkin_Princess · March 2013

BeckyTheEngineer:
I would decline her request. It is pretty brazen to ask. But, I don't think it's crazy to imagine taking care of three kids at once. This will be my third baby (all under 3) and obviously I plan to take care of all of my kids. If she is thinking that she might put the kids to sleep (and you have room for that, and they are good sleepers at night, and if you have had good experiences watching the kids in the past) then I would probably entertain that idea.

I think the difference here is that they are your kids, so you are expected to take care of them all at once. It's not the same as a relative coming in from out of town and dumping an extra 2 kids on you while she goes out with her boyfriend.

OP, your SIL would get a resounding HELL NO! from me as well. It was extremely rude and inconsiderate for her to even ask.

Lolalipsy · March 2013

tuffytiff:
The purpose of the trip is them coming to visit the new baby, not for you to babysit her children. A bit tacky of her to ask, you'll be exhausted! You're not crazy at all!

Ditto.

Danifer26 · March 2013

Tell her to take care of her own darn kid! You have enough to worry about! Have her boyfriend play with baby, is she serious? I would tell her no or have DH do it! She has some nerve!

c-elizabethf · March 2013

Uh no, that's is rude. I would say no.

gradmommy13 · March 2013

Um...yeah....that's kind of rude. They should be the ones helping you out, not the other way around. I would personally say "no" to so many people coming from out of town to visit, let alone watching their kids for them!

katester42 · March 2013

I'm not going to lie if she were to have asked me I probably would have laughed thinking she was joking, until she corrected me!

But in all seriousness I think it's completely uncalled for and if I were you I would tell her no. Maybe suggest her looking into babysitters in the area or asking her parents. If they say no too then I guess her and her bf are going to have to parent up and watch her kids.

I would never in my wildest dreams even think of asking parents of a newborn to watch my kids when I'm going to visit them. Completely rude on her part.