Hello, let me introduce myself first..
For the first 30 years of my life, everything was smooth and worry-free. I was my parents’ most beloved child, found my true love in college, and happily married him after graduation.
At work, I was my boss’s most valued employee. Whenever I was in charge of a project, colleagues would inevitably say, “Oh, then I’m totally at ease.” I was constantly named “Employee of the Year,” with generous bonuses every year.
Later, I started my own business. Within just three months, I had broken into the market and started making money. By the fifth month, I was earning twice my previous salary. Growth was steady month after month. Right when the business needed more hands, I serendipitously met an amazing partner, and the company reached a whole new level.
Really, it seemed like at every step, whatever I needed, a pair of hands would always place it right in front of me, just in time.
My Two Girls: Ellie & Mia
Meet Ellie, My Firstborn
In 2020, my husband and I decided to have a child. After trying for over a year, we finally got the news in 2021 that a little one was on the way. In 2022, we welcomed our first child, Ellie. She made me a mother.
She is utterly adorable—big eyes, rosy skin, chubby little hands. Every time I look at her, I can’t help but give her a kiss. She is pure joy, and I love her more each day.
But as a first-time mom, I faced unprecedented difficulties. The postpartum tearing wouldn’t heal, and the pain was excruciating. Clogged milk ducts made my breasts hard as rocks. The severe sleep deprivation… And what was even more crushing was that, with zero parenting experience, I was clueless when faced with her unexplained wailing, night terrors, refusal to nurse, constipation, diarrhea, fevers… I desperately searched online, longing for one accurate, truly useful answer!
It was during this time that I thought, once I make it through this “dark” path, I must leave a light on for other new moms.
And Then Came Mia
Ellie had just turned one when I got pregnant again. In 2024, we welcomed our second daughter, Mia.
Completely different from Ellie, Mia is a great eater and sleeper. Although she had her fussy moments in the first two months, starting almost from month three, she became super easygoing. She feeds on schedule, gradually sleeps through the night, loves her solid foods, and adapted quickly when I had to stop breastfeeding due to mastitis.
This made me realize just how vastly different babies can be! It made me even more determined to write about my experiences.
Why I Had to Start This Blog
The Catalyst: A Life Pivoted
After Mia was born, my business also began to decline sharply. I had no choice but to close it and become a full-time mom. My work no longer involves Excel and Word, but instead revolves around changing diapers, washing bottles, making baby food, and managing household chores…
This has been a monumental challenge for me. All my past achievements seem irrelevant now. Managing two young children has brought me a sense of frustration I’ve never known before.
The Daily Reality
They are always fighting over things. When one is in my arms, the other immediately demands to be held too. When I try to cook, Ellie wants me to read her a book. When I attempt to load the washing machine, Mia has a diaper blowout, and I must drop everything to change her…
By the time I finish all that, I see the cup of hot coffee on the table has gone cold again. And it’s not until evening that I remember, “Oh my goodness, the clothes are still in the hamper, unwashed!”
Of course, being a mom is filled with happiness, but that doesn’t negate how hard it is.
My Promise to You
Because I’ve walked this path myself, I won’t just tell you how joyful motherhood is, like many websites do. I want to share my real, unfiltered experiences so every new mom can find a “companion” here.
I want to tell you: you are not alone. What you’re going through, I’ve been there too. Your breakdowns, your helplessness, your moments of losing control—I’ve had them all. You don’t need to feel guilty. This is just a small, necessary stretch of the journey for every mom.
My Hope for This Space
I really want to share my parenting experiences—not just the warm, glowing moments, but to honestly document the pitfalls I’ve stumbled into, the tears I’ve shed, and the “survival wisdom” I’ve scraped together in utter exhaustion.
The Goal: A Mom’s Toolkit
I hope this blog becomes a “mom’s toolkit,” filled not with vague theories, but with:
- Practical Tips: Like how to quickly figure out why a baby is crying, tried-and-true methods for dealing with clogged ducts, or how to efficiently manage the daily grind with twins (or two under two) solo.
- Pitfall Avoidance Guides: Sharing the baby products I regret buying the most, and those “game-changer” parenting hacks. Letting you know which parenting anxieties you can let go of, and which principles are worth holding onto.
- A Community for Moms: I hope my stories connect me with more moms like you. We can cheer each other on in the comments, share our own tricks, turning the storms we face alone into a journey we walk together.
The Bigger Vision
My previous career taught me to analyze data, solve problems, and optimize processes. Now, I’m applying all those skills to this new “position” of Mom. I want to prove that a mom’s value is absolutely not confined to the home. The mindset, resilience, and creativity we built in our careers can shine just as brightly—perhaps even brighter—in this more complex, long-term “project” of raising humans, and can even be transformed into a force that helps others.
My hope is simple: that every mom who opens this blog can let out a sigh of relief and say, “So it’s not just me.” Then, she can find a bit of practical info, a dose of comforting solidarity, and return to her sweet, chaotic mom-life with a little more confidence and a little less weight on her shoulders.
This road? Let’s walk it together.
doozer1345
member
Re: Nursing Question...
TTC#1 for 19 months with PCOS and MFI IUI#3 + injectables = BFP!!!! Beta#1-134(13dpiui) Beta #2-392(15dpiui)
#1 born December 2011
TTC#2 - Beta #1 -51@10dpo Beta#2 -1353 @16dpo
#2 born May 2013
TTC # 3 June 2014 BFP 12-1-14
#3 born August 2015
#4!!!!!!! due June 2017
We didn't have any issues caused by the c-section itself. DS latched well and nursed within a half hour or so after I got out of surgery. (I think it took about 30-40 minutes to stitch me up and move me to recovery.)
Our issues started when they sent him to the NICU later that day and I didn't see him for hours. I also had unrealistic expectations, and didn't realize how often I needed to feed him, and my milk took awhile to come in. I don't think any of it was c-section related.
I did have some discomfort when trying to do a cradle hold - the football hold was more comfortable.
edit - I forgot to say, my arms were really shaky after the surgery, so I waited until I felt confident that I could hold him.
I had an unplanned csection. The healing process went well, but I did end up using a regular pillow more than my breast friend pillow while breast feeding my LO bc of how sensitive the incision was and I have to supplement with formula the first two weeks bc my LO lost too much weight since the milk didn't come in until 5 days after she was born. All I can say is, just try to keep an open mind when the time comes and try to go with the flow. By that time, it might just be easier to stay relaxed (you are going to need all the rest/energy you can accumulate) and enjoy your moments with your LO.
Good luck, cherrish the moments and hold on for the ride of your life...
I wouldn't worry too much about the c-section having an impact. Just start things off as soon as you're in recovery and keep it up!
I've heard that your milk can come in a bit more slowly with a cs, but I had a scheduled c-section at 37 weeks, and my milk was in within 2 days - so it's definitely nothing guaranteed or universal. As far as the incision, I just used the hospital bed pillows to position baby, and was perfectly fine comfort-wise.
Same here.
Charlotte Ella 07.16.10
Emmeline Grace 03.27.13
I never had any issues breastfeeding after my c-section. DD never left my side though- they kept her with me at all times until we got up to the room. I'm surprised not all hospitals do that!
I was sore, but if you stay on top of your meds and don't overdo it, you'll be fine. I didn't have any problems using the Boppy. Just find a comfy chair to nurse in.
My milk came in on day four. My incision wasn't painful for nursing, but if you are concerned, you can work with the LC on football hold. As we had twins, I mostly nursed in FB hold in the beginning. I have had many problems with nursing and have a very low supply, but it is all due to my boys latching issues from their prematurity and small for gestational age diagnosis. My issues have absolutely nothing to do with the c/s.
GL!
12dp5dt: 765; 15dp5dt: 1979; 17dp5dt: 3379...TWINS!!!!!
Our perfect baby boys were born at 36w1d!!
Find a private lactation consultant you can call if you do have problems. I ended up pumping for the he first few days while we got our latch down, and having the hospital LCs were a godsend (he was in the NICU and pediatrics after he was born, so we weren't together all the time the first few days). We also did a lot of side-lying nursing because I was so exhausted. But! my c-section was unplanned, which can make a difference.
My son ended up nursing for 2 years, so it worked out in the end. Good luck!
DS2 - Oct 2010 (my VBAC baby!)
My Ovulation Chart
Successfully BF my c-section DS for over a year. My milk came in on day 2. Based upon all these posts, you can see it can be done which hopefully is relieving your anxiety. GL!
**DD1 - 7/9/98**
**DS - 11/9/00**
**DD2 - 4/30/13**
Baby took to breastfeeding right away and had no problem with the pain. The incision was so low, I just held him a bit higher.
This was my experience too!
No issues here either. I don't remember much pain while holding her either (I used a boppy most of the time).
The only thing I couldn't do was lift her from the rock and play to my bed to feed her (had to be standing up to feel strong enough to lift her) or sit up/lay on my side in bed to feed her for the first month or so. I needed the support of a chair early on (or the reclined hospital bed).
I had absolutely no problems with nursing my son after my C section. My milk was in within 2 days and we left the hospital with him gaining weigh rather than being down post birth!
I found it easiest to hold him in a football hold while nursing at the hospital.
I had an unexpected and difficult c-section and struggled getting started with breastfeeding. Luckily the hospital I was at had lactation consultants that were a huge help! Also, the nurses were very helpful, when I asked for help they would come in and help me get DD latched. We did end up supplementing with formula before we ever left the hospital. If you do supplement I highly recommend using a Supplemental Nursing System (SNS). I'm fairly certain that using one saved my breastfeeding relationship with my daughter.
https://www.medelabreastfeedingus.com/products/52/starter-supplemental-nursing-system-sns.
I had no problems BFing due to c-section.
Good luck!!
~after 34 cycles we finally got our 2nd little bundle of joy~
My IF blog