Anyone have trouble DTD?

JessAnnJ · February 2013

I got the okay for sex at my six week but when I tried it was so painful that we ended up with a failed attempt that had not been repeated. I had bad tearing but my doctor said I had healed remarkably well and you can't even tell that I had an internal tear I also had a 3rd degree tear. He explained that my discomfort during the exam was because when stitching up sometimes you end up tighter and that I have to stretch out. Well sex was basically unbearable with massive amounts lube. Is anyone else having this problem?

kerbear135 · February 2013

I can't say that DTD hurts (i had a very small 2nd degree tear), but despite my enjoyment, the last time we tried it was like the darn Sahara down there...DH understood it was a hormone thing, but it was still pretty darn embarrassing....

nanabanana06 · February 2013

I had a section gain, but your first time can be very unpleasant. I finally did it with DH after a few glasses of wine. That is my suggestion, drink and get it over with. It's gunna suck at first, but it'll go back to normal soon.

st.augbride · February 2013

I was very scared it would hurt after an episiotomy that the doc said would take a good 6 months to heal 100%, but it didn't. It does feel uncomfortable with certain positions, but being mindful of that, things were ok. If you were in pain, I would give it another 2 weeks from when you last tried, get a lot of lube, and give it another shot. If it's still bad, I'd schedule another ob appt just to make sure things are ok and explain the pain you're feeling.

rainbows&unicorns · February 2013

Yep, I'm with ya and hoping it will get better in time. I had a second degree tear and was given the green light after my postpartum appointment. We've DTD a few times and each time I go into it with the mindset that it's not going to hurt but instead it feels like I'm getting an indian burn on my lady parts. Good times.

MrsJRD23 · February 2013

You can also develop a condition called vulvodynia or vulvar vestibulitis after pregnancy, often due to changes in hormones that can make intercourse painful, like burning, on fire type of pain. Yeah, I got that.

It sucks and I'm going to physical therapy for it.

nothing101 · February 2013

I had a 4th degree tear with my first and took more than 3mths for me to even sit correctly. Sex was even scarier. What helped was using the shower head in the shower or in a bath, massaging the scar tissue, nothing sexual or anything but to break up the scar tissue it helped. It hurt but it helped. The pain did go away and soon I forgot all about it and intercourse was no longer scary same with sitting on hard surfaces. This time around I only had a 2nd degree tear which was nothing compared to my first. It gets better, and you'll get through it then you'll do it all over again :

jelly0822 · February 2013

Sad to say, we tried once. It sucks because DH was feeling weird about it when I was pregnant and now that she's out, we're exhausted. And I never pushed the issue because I wasn't sure about how it would feel. I think it hurt because I was so anxious. Now we know that a lot of lube is needed and to go slow. We'll try again soon, I hope!

lawjjg522 · February 2013

It did hurt the first few time but has started to get better.

kescalera · February 2013

As much as we enjoyed our sex life before, it has become my absolute least favorite activity since delivery. I was very excited when I got the okay from my doc but each time we try it hurts, i can't feel a darn thing other than the stretching even when its not sharply painful, even using lube I dry up faster than water in Phoenix in July. I actually had to tell my DH the other day that I was really starting to resent him for asking for it and that I dreaded it every time I said yes because it was so awful. Hard to convince someone you still love them & are physically attracted to them when a major part of the physical relationship is of no interest. I would rather stay up all night with a screaming LO than have sex these days =(

ilenegrace · February 2013

It took me 7 months to enjoy sex after having a 2nd degree tear with DS. This time thankfully the first time was good.

kayandzac · February 2013

Yep. Had a 3rd degree tear too. We're just doing it slowly coz it still hurts. Good thing he understands. I do bleed a little after sex and just wait till it clears up again... So try till you feel confortable.

krm1117 · February 2013

I am so glad you posted this. We have had trouble too. It hurt so bad when we tried both times. I feel bad for my husband. I am feeling a lot better this past week but we've been so busy and tired that we havent tried again. Maybe this weekend. I will say it was nice not having him bug me about sex like he was before. He understands that I was still in pain and he felt bad so he left me alone. Good Luck. I hope everyone can get back to normal soon.

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