an intro!

I've been lurking on this board, posting a teeny bit, so thought I should do an intro so everybody knows who I am.

I'm 39, about to get married for the second time to a great guy (his first marriage). Less than a month away we're running off to Vegas. Woot!

I have 3 kids with my first loser husband, a 20 year old ds (G) and dds who are 17 (HJ) and 15 (B). They live with my fiance and I fulltime and have very little contact with their father at all. Fiance has no kids of his own, but has stepped right in and is doing a great job as a stepparent to two teens and a young adult!

G goes to the local university so he still lives at home, but he's transferring in June and moving 5 hours away to live with his girlfriend (who we all adore). HJ will be going to college in the fall about an hour away and will be living in the dorms but home to visit a lot, I'm sure. Our house is about to get a lot emptier!

Background on first marriage- met in high school, got pregnant right after graduation, stayed with him even though we had nothing in common and wasn't really interested in the whole family thing so much. I did get three great kids from him though. We were married for 18 years, most of them heII. He was emotionally abusive and it took a lot of counseling after the divorce to figure out why I put up with it and stuff.

Anyway, we got divorced because I caught him sleeping with a chick from highschool that he was chatting with on facebook and I kicked his butt out. He lives with her and her houseful of kids about 30minutes away. He was around some for the kids at first, paid his child support and all that, took them to dinner about once a month, etc. Not much, but something. Then his gf made him quit his great job in my city to work in their town so I wouldn't be trying to get him back. Um yeah, don't want him, but thanks. But she didn't like him dropping by my house to see his kids. Now he makes 9 bucks an hour and is getting more and more behind on child support, and this is all somehow my fault. He doesn't pay any of the medical or sports related fees that he's responsible for 50%. We have a very open visitation agreement, basically he can see them whenever he wants as long as we don't have plans first. I have NEVER told him he couldn't see them. I encourage him to see them for birthdays and stuff. He has not chosen to see them for any holiday or birthday in over 2 years. He makes me so mad.

He only sees his kids maybe 2-3 times a year, talks on the phone with them a couple times a year, sends a few texts, usually on a holiday or something. Doesn't go to any concerts, sporting events, anything. Did I mention he lives 30 fricking minutes away? And when he does see them it's frequently to take them to KFC for a quick chicken dinner (and the two oldest work at KFC, so he takes them to work to eat. Nice.)

But thank God for my sweet man who sticks by us when I have angry raging teenage girls who got stoodup and ignored by their father yet again. Everytime B sees or talks to her dad it ends with anger and tears. It's so hard to see them hurting and know I can't make him be around for them.

Anyway, thanks for reading, this seems like a super supportive board with a low bullsh!t tolerance, which I love, and I'm happy to have found it!