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Natural Birth
melosch
member
switching midwives?
melosch
member
Hi all, I'm new to this forum and just shy of 14 weeks.
I am wondering if anyone on here has changed midwives (or OBs) in the middle of their pregnancy.
I have been for 2 appointments with my senior midwife (3 if you count the initial birthing center tour) and I am having a really hard time clicking with her. I love the nurse midwife and student midwife on my team, but there is just something about the tone/cadence and style of her communication that not only bothers me, but sometimes confuses me when she's answering a question or commenting on pregnancy/birth.
My gut is telling me I need to find another senior midwife (thinking about having this midwife in the room when I'm in labor is not a soothing or grounding feeling) but I'm having feelings of guilt for "firing" her. I plan to continue to use the same student and nurse midwifes on my team and request another senior midwife at the birthing center - I just don't want it to be awkward.
Any thoughts, advice or your own experiences would be greatly appreciated.
This discussion has been closed.
Re: switching midwives?
I have not changed MWs, but my advice is always the same. If you have met with a MW (or any provider, for that matter) several times and are uncomfortable with him or her, you should find a new provider. Giving birth is an incredibly challenging thing to do and you need to be able to put complete trust in your chosen provider. You shouldn't feel guilty; sometimes we just don't click with a certain person. That doesn't mean this MW isn't a good one, but she's not the one for you.
Good luck with your decision. I hope you're able to find a MW you feel really comfortable with!
i switched from an ob/hospital birth to a mw/birth center birth plan at 25 weeks.
it is so, so, important for you to feel 100 percent comfortable with your provider.
i TOTALLY understand the guilt thing. i had nothing against my ob, i just didn't feel like we shared similar views re:childbirth, and since the goal at the end of all this is to birth a child, i felt pretty strongly that i needed to find someone who was on the same page.
so, you're definitely not too late, please don't feel guilty, and i hope you find someone you click with completely!
Over-40 parents...what we lack in vigor, we make up for with cunning.
Thank you all SO much for your responses.
Sometimes you just need a little reassurance that you're not making some irrational decision, you know?
I'm going to get in touch with the other 2 midwives on my team and request that they help me secure a different senior midwife.
And isn't that the whole basis of midwife care? We make the decisions around our pregnancy and birth?
Thanks ladies!
I am literally in the process of doing this right now and I'm 26 weeks, switching from midwives at a hospital to a homebirth midwife. I had the same "guilt" feeling at first about firing the hosptial midwife group, but I'm over it now
I spoke to the homebirth midwife today and I'm so so relieved that I have things on track now!
14 weeks is early, so great that you are figuring it out now!
I switched from one very, shall we say, "surgically oriented" practice to a more natural birth friendly one at 25 weeks and now that I'm at 39 and the rubber is really about to hit the road here, I am extremely glad I did.
That is different than staying with the practice and choosing a different provider - I am not able to do that in my case, whoevers on call is on call - but generally speaking, week 14 is plenty of time to make adjustments. Good luck!