dealing with weight comments

sfochler · February 2013

So I am 38 weeks pregnant and have gained 45lbs during pregnancy. Before I got pregnant I had lost over 60 lbs, so gaining back the weight has been extermly hard as is, but now whenever I see anyone (family, friends, strangers) and it doesnt seem to matter where I go all people say is "wow look how big your are", "you have really popped", "are you sure you arent having twins" etc., and the past week or so I have been have a really hard time dealing with the comments and found myself in a crying breakdown today when my mother said look how much you have popped in the last couple of days. I know that its all apart of having this wonderful baby but I just so overwhelmed with the weight comments, that I just want to stay in my house for the next couple of weeks. Sorry about the rant but just looking for some advice on how to deal with people and their comments?

lifewrite · February 2013

I'm so sorry peoples comments are getting you down. Sad

People really just don't think about what they are saying. If it was my mother though I'd be completely honest and tell her how you're feeling and that comments like that make it worse.

sarahensz · February 2013

That's what I love about the staff in the doctors office. They never say stuff like that.

526SadieSadie · February 2013

I don't know why people think it's ok to say things like that to pregnant women!!! It's so incredibly rude, I'm sorry you've had this experience.

Annelea · February 2013

I think people dont realize what they are saying or they think they are funny. dont listen to them! i had a coworker who kept calling me chubby, granted she is way bigger than i am even at 38 weeks so i dont think she had room to talk but she has always been catty and rude so i just decided her opinion does not count because in the end all i want is a healthy LO and if it takes a few extra pounds, so be it!

TMWarren85 · February 2013

I had lost a lot of weight a few years before I got pregnant 75 lbs but still struggle with image and eating issues, it will always be a struggle for me. I gained 70 lbs with DD and it was really hard, to the point that I didn't enjoy my pregnancy at all. One day my mom comes over when I was about 7 months pregnant and started singing "fatty fatty two by four" thinking it was endearing... I broke down. No one realized, with the exception of DH how much I struggled with my weight gain. It wasn't until after that I relayed that to my close family to prevent it from being an issue next time around. It took almost a year, but I lost I all.
I know it's difficult, especially since you worked so hard to lose the weight to begin with, but here's the thing you've done it once so you know why it takes and how to do it again. There are a lot of women who gain a lot of weight during pregnancy and have no idea how to get it off. You're almost there, just give it time. One thing I had to keep telling myself was that it took ten months to gain all that pregnancy weight, it could take just as long to get it off, just don't give up.

highlights · February 2013

I lost a ton of weight before I got pregnant, and have gained all but 4 pounds back (with 10 weeks left to go).

It's hard. the same thing happened with my last pregnancy, and I was finally down to my pre-pregnancy weight when I got pregnant again. I think the best thing to do is stand up for yourself when people make cruel comments and let them know how much it hurts.

lsleeper22 · February 2013

I'm only 34 weeks and I can already relate to this, lol. When everyone says to me? "WOW! you've really popped" or just simply ?Woww?? and the inflection and surprise in their voice alone says it all, it sometimes gets to me too. We can only be mentally tough for so long before these repeating comments get the best of our slightly unstable emotions at this stage. The only thing we can do is try our very best to stay focused on our LO's and remember this is temporary. I have no doubt I will be in hideaway for the last few weeks as well. Try to stay positive.

angieeaton · February 2013

See I feel the same way. BUT i've only gain 15lbs and am 36weeks and when I tell people or people c me and know im pg they look @ me and think/say What r u 4months. Its like no I'm due in 4 weeks.

I get so mad @ people now cause I hear this almost every day

MelTwe · February 2013

I feel like the " wow, you've really popped comments" refer more to your bump specifically and not general weight gain. The size of your bump and how you carry the baby are not in your control, so I don't see the point in taking offense to this. To me it's independent of weight gain. You're pregnant, not overweight. It's a different mentality.

If anything, I would think that if that's where the majority of your weight gain is going, it'll be more likely to have it go down much quicker after delivery. I know I'm on track to gain slightly more this time around, but feel smaller overall because I have a big baby and extra amniotic fluid, which will cause me to weigh more. Try not to sweat it. I really don't think anyone is trying to be offensive.

kksmitha21 · February 2013

Ugh I feel your pain. My boss just walked in my office and said when are you due? I said March 17th he then says are you sure your not having twins because your HUGE. I just smiled and said no just one big ass baby in there thanks. But I really wanted to kill him.

Annaeliz84 · February 2013

I'm so sorry that people have been getting you down. I certainly understand crying fits! Maybe when someone says something that gets you down, focus on the fact that you ALREADY LOST 60 POUNDS! This time around, it's 45 and half of that (or more!) is a baby and the stuff that go along with that. Losing 60 pounds is no small feat. If you've already managed that then you can definitely do the 20-30 after baby! Next time someone says something that upsets you, I hope focusing on what an amazing job you've already done, helps those comments roll off your shoulder.

Good luck and hang in there!

OhBaby+2013 · February 2013

So I'm a pretty straight forward person, so when I got this comments, which I got a lot as I gained 60 lbs, I would say "wow, you sure know how to make a girl feel good!" and people almost always started back tracking, to which I would then say "maybe you don't realize it but you basically just called me fat". Some people don't realize they are being ignorant so I would always try to enlighten them. Hang in there and don't worry about what anyone says.....good for you for losing the 60 lbs....you will be surprised at how much you will lose after baby comes.

sowhatwhocares · February 2013

sfochler:
So I am 38 weeks pregnant and have gained 45lbs during pregnancy. Before I got pregnant I had lost over 60 lbs, so gaining back the weight has been extermly hard as is, but now whenever I see anyone (family, friends, strangers) and it doesnt seem to matter where I go all people say is "wow look how big your are", "you have really popped", "are you sure you arent having twins" etc., and the past week or so I have been have a really hard time dealing with the comments and found myself in a crying breakdown today when my mother said look how much you have popped in the last couple of days. I know that its all apart of having this wonderful baby but I just so overwhelmed with the weight comments, that I just want to stay in my house for the next couple of weeks. Sorry about the rant but just looking for some advice on how to deal with people and their comments?

Sorry, no advice, but I've gained as much as you, and I'm 32 weeks. since you have lost weight before, you can lose the post-baby weight for sure. Go easy on yourself, mama! *hug*

ShawMich · February 2013

People are rude. Don't listen to what they say.

spklasvegas · February 2013

I honestly think people do not think before they open their mouth. I have the opposite problem. I am sick and tired of people saying I don't look big enough for how far along I am. How much frickin' weight do they think I should gain? I also get sick of people trying to touch my tummy!

AFBTB · February 2013

I'm sorry that happened to you. Some people seriously have no brain to mouth filter. Try not to let it get to you, I know, easier said than done. I've had the breakdowns over these comments as well. Try to focus on the fact that you are growing a healthy baby, and nothing else matters.

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