2year old fit throwing

Captaint · February 2013

Help, ideas. I just had my second child and my two year old cries a lot and constantly throwing a fit. We have spanked, took toys away, payed no attention and used time out! Nothing seems to be working. Fyi: New baby sister, potty training, teething, just got rid of binky, and goes to daycare

sschwege · February 2013

I guess I would need more information than just this to really give you any advice.

But from the little you have told me it sounds like your LO has gone through a lot of changes. Have you considered making special time for just the two of you? Even something small like cooking together or something might make a difference.

kescalera · February 2013

sschwege:
I guess I would need more information than just this to really give you any advice.But from the little you have told me it sounds like your LO has gone through a lot of changes. nbsp;Have you considered making special time for just the two of you? nbsp;Even something small like cooking together or something might make a difference.nbsp;

This I see replacement "issues" ie 2 can't communicate sad mad etc about sharing mom dad, not bad issues Maybe some more focus on positive reinforcement plus special oneonone time would be worth a try

blowfish11 · February 2013

So you're spanking and punishing your child for having a very natural and normal reaction to huge changes in life?

*backs out of post*

ETA: You say you "pay no attention" to him when he acts up. That's exactly the opposite of what you should be doing. Shame on you, OP.

SingleMom31 · February 2013

It sounds like he's had a lot of changes with sister and daycare, and like you've taken away some of the ways he'd cope like his pacifier and time alone with mom and dad. Toss in that he's likely uncomfortable with teething, and I don't blame him for acting out. At 2, they don't have the cognative ability to reason out all those changes and express feelings of sadness or anxiety in any other way EXCEPT to act out. I doubt you'll get anywhere with an sort of punishment until you deal with his underlying feelings.

Like PPs suggested, you probably need to spend more time with him and give him more attention. My dad always took me grocery shopping on Saturdays... He'd get me breakfast out somewhere like BK or McDs... nowhere expensive, we'd go shopping, and then home. Sometimes we didn't have much to talk about, sometimes I'd scream through the whole store, and sometimes we'd talk a lot... It's one of my favorite memories. Anyway, my pt is that it doesn't have to be anything extraordinary... Just time.

LittleFish1 · February 2013

Those are a lot of changes! How would a misbehavior been handled before the sibling came along?

Not to judge, just a question, with all the changes that the 2 yr old is experiencing, why does the binky have to go away at this point in time? (I assuming this is the pacifier). I am assuming dental reasons with teeth coming in ... Would a few more months with the pacifier make that much of a difference?

ilenegrace · February 2013

Sounds like a typical 2 year old to me.... and it doesn't get any better at 3. Good luck!

freelancemommy · February 2013

When my toddler gets really upset, I will often say, "you seem really upset . Do you need a hug?" And more than 50 of the time she tearfully says yes, hugs me, and the tantrum ends. Maybe you should try that before you hit your kid.

itsmevkb · February 2013

My 19 month old cries a lot when he's not getting what he wants and out of frustration because he can't fully communicate with us. I get frustrated but I never hit him. What exactly would that teach him? To be scared of me or that it's okay to hit people? A child that little can't understand that you're hitting him to get him to stop crying and knowing that someone they love is physically hurting them is only going to make them cry more. I don't think time outs are a horrible idea, although I use them for misbehavior, not for when my son is obviously frustrated because of lack of attention or inability to communicate.

Since you just had a baby how about making that the only big change in your two-year old's life right now? I know you can't help the new babysitter but you can help things like letting him use a pacifier and delaying potty training for another six months or so. Teething can be helped with either natural remedies or use Advil or Tylenol. I think a little extra one and one attention could go a long way as well. Do you have a special bedtime routine that is just between the two of you? Can you take just him out for a shopping trip or something fun? Create a daily routine that has just mommy and me time in it somewhere.

I'm feeling a sad for your child thinking of them crying and just wanting your love and you hitting them instead.

kerribear1717 · February 2013

Yeah ... my 2 year old acts like that A LOT. And what works best is giving them attention because I'd say probably at least 90% of the time that is why he's acting bad.

I would certainly not want to have my kid deal with all of those changes at once. Makes your life hell as well as theirs. Give the binky back and stop trying to potty train would be my main advice. You can't do much about the others. I know some people swear by teething tablets but I've never used them myself.

Captaint · February 2013

I don't just hit my child. He got a spanking when he broke the safety cover of an outlet and could have hurt himself he did that way before baby. Yes, I do spend time with him one on one, just Friday we made applesauce. We live near a Walmart and sometimes we'll go play with the toys. I love taking him to Barnes Noble so he can play with the trains and read books. I pay attention to him but not when he's throwing his fit. I love my children, they are the best thing about me I would be nothing with out them. He and I pick up a saying from Daniel Tiger's Neighborhood"ugga mugga" !!! Thanks to some of you for your ideas and comments.

SingleMom31 · February 2013

Perhaps look at this article about discipline. If the outlet thing happened a while before your LO arrived, he was too young to even be punished for it. https://www.parents.com/baby/development/behavioral/whenshouldyoustartdisciplining/

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