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Babies: 0 - 3 Months
RP - HELP! DS screams after/during eating
(Repost from breastfeeding with update from today at end)
Hi all, I really need some help. I'm losing my sanity here and am
thinking maybe formula will just be an easy solution although I really
don't want to FF. (Sorry, this will be long)
My DS is 6wk 3days old. For the last 2ish weeks, he has started screaming/crying at my breasts when they are empty. He never seems satisfied no matter how full my breasts are or how often he eats. He always takes both breasts at a meal and nearly always ends up screaming, unless I'm lucky enough to have him fall asleep nursing. He used to take about an hour to nurse and would always fall asleep, but now it's ~20 min for both breasts and when he's done he screams because it wasn't long enough to make him sleepy. He has never actually unlatched himself from my breast (again, unless he falls asleep which is getting more and more rare). His latch is great, never had any problems with that. Sometimes he does spit up what feels like the entirety of what he ate, and other times it seems like a normal amount (no amount of burping/not burping, unlatching periodically so he can get a breath, sitting him more upright, etc. seems to change this and it can be different at each feeding although large spitup always seems to happen after 1st breast taken, whether it's right or left). So we end every feeding with screaming and crying and he is nearly inconsolable. Is this just sleepiness? I really don't feel like he's truly not getting enough to eat; he's gaining weight and peeing great. He's a very oral child and nearly always needs something in his mouth; I'd be fine with him just sucking on my breast after it was empty in order to help himself get to sleep, but it seems like the minute it's nearly empty he just screams. Sometimes when he does this, I can squeeze a little more milk out. Sometimes he will try relatching a few times and then scream again, and other times he refuses to even try relatching and just screams. It is so frustrating for me as I feel that I can't keep my child content and every "bonding" session of feeding is dreaded because I know how they will end.
Other info:
my child won't sleep on his own (never has, even in the hospital);
sleeps on me all day and night. I've spent hours and hours trying to
get him to sleep in PnP or bassinet to no avail. He very rarely falls
asleep in swing, and might fall asleep in bouncer if you bounce it more
intensely with your foot the whole time. Since birth, he has been a very
wakeful and alert child and really struggles against going to sleep.
Sun. night he slept at my breast (he wakes and cries if I try to put my
shirt back down during the night); we slept okay 11-2:30ish, he woke
and ate, then slept until about 5am when he woke and ate and from then
until 8:30 he was nearly literally eating the whole time with
intermittent (~5min) sleeping, nibbling, then waking to eat a few gulps
again. At 8:30 I tried to do side feeding (which goes fine for us) on
the breast he hadn't been on all night, but he emptied that in 10 min
and started screaming. I felt that at the very least, after 3 hours of
eating, he should be satisfied this time - not true! I tried Dr. Karp's
"5 S's" and none of it worked. I finally got him in the swing where he
stared around for awhile and finally fell asleep about 30 min into it and stayed asleep less than an hour.
HELP!!! I need advice or someone to comiserate with. I am losing my mind with this, feeling like a terrible mom who can't console her child and never has as much as he wants to eat. Anyone experience this or have advice?
Update from today: Today since 11am he has slept 2x for 30 min each. He ate 5 or 6 times between 8:30am and 7pm, and I had to distract him highly at the end of each to stop the crying. I just tried to feed him and he ate for 2 min on left breast, turned bright red and screamed, then 3 min on right breast and turned bright red and screamed. I tried compressions, switching breasts, burping, pacifier, all to no avail. He refused to even go back on my left breast. However, I know both breasts still had plenty of milk; the right one even sprayed when I tested it. I just don't know what to do at this point. Our local breastfeeding group doesn't meet until Thurs. AM and I don't know if I can last that long.
Thanks for any help.
This discussion has been closed.
Re: RP - HELP! DS screams after/during eating
Have you had him checked for reflux? The screaming after eating and the not wanting to sleep (since laying down makes the acid go up their throat) sound like that could be the reason for the issues you are having.
Hey there!! I had the EXACT same problem....we did make the decision to transition her to Formula at 10 weeks for alot of reasons including the problem with her and I going crazy!! She does MUCH better now with the frustration, but if she's already starving, sometimes I have to leave the bottle nipple in her mouth for about 30 seonds while she's screaming before she'll take it...its like she's preoccupied with the crying and screaming and hasn't learned how to smoothly transition from crying to eating....
So, I'll usually try to preempt a screaming disaster by feeding her just before she becomes so ravenous that she's screaming mess....usually means prepping a bottle at about 2 1/2 hours after her last feeding and hoping she'll be hungry enough to start eating....it works really well for us...but there are times when I prep that early bottle and she won;t take it because she's not hungry enough...so it just goes into the fridge for a while.
There are still times that she literally goes apey during or after a feeding, sometimes she just needs to burp really well, but I think it's also because she's still learning to express what she needs and wants.....GOOD LUCK!!
Could you call the hospital you delivered at and speak to one of the LCs tomorrow? The first thing that popped into my head was reflux.
I think the whole sleeping thing seems like another issue that you probably want to break asap. Even if it is reflux, he should be able to sleep slightly propped in a swing or carseat with no problem.
Good luck!! Hope you get some answers.
I'm really sorry you are dealing with this. Newborns can be sooo tough. A few thoughts:
1. He might have reflux. Have him checked by the pedi and possibly experiment with AR meds to see if it helps.
2. He might be allergic to something you are eating. Try cutting out dairy to see if that helps. If not, slowly eliminate foods from your diet to see if he can tolerate anything but the mildest of foods.
3. I strongly recommend you see a lactation consultant ASAP. Call your local hospital or your pedi for recommendations. When my DD started behaving like this, it turned out my supply was decreasing. I started supplementing with formula (much as I hated to do it) and she had a total personality change and was the happiest baby in the world.
4. If you have a pump, try pumping and giving him a bottle to see if he takes it all in addition to nursing. If you have the heart, go ahead and try a little formula to see if he will take it in addition to nursing. I know you don't want to do this, but doing it once to see if he is eating enough is worth it.
5. Wanting to be held 24/7 is not uncommon. He will eventually outgrow it, I promise. I realize this makes life very difficult for you now, however. One thing to keep in mind - many babies turn a corner, so to speak, around the 9-12w mark.
I wish you the very best!!
TTC #2 since 9/09 --- mild PCOS; Endometriosis
IUI x4 = BFN
IVF = sometime in 2012
We had the same problem - I thought it was something I was eating that was making her gassy. I spoke with her pedi about it, thinking that she would ask me to do some type of elimination diet, and she said it sounded like reflux and put her on medication. That was last Thursday and by yesterday she was like a whole new baby - the fussiness and screaming at my breast mostly went away, and I can tell when she has discomfort.
And knock on wood, but her sleep has dramatically improved too. I'd definitely talk to your pediatrician. Good luck to you!