Is This Normal? Battling At Mealtime

patchen30 · February 2013

Let me describe the scene 3x per day: I put a variety of things on LO's tray, he takes two bites, throws everything on the floor and screams. I pick it up, repeat. I add something else that I know he usually likes. This keeps him occupied for a little bit, then he throws everything on the floor again and screams. By the end of the meal my floor, DS and the highchair are a TOTAL mess and I'm ready to cry. I finally let LO out when I feel like he's consumed enough to constitute a meal.

Today after lunch he'd consumed: 1 bite of strawberry, 3 licks of cream cheese, 5 bites of a cereal bar, a large slice of pear, 10 sips of apple juice, 3 bites of a puree, 4 oz of milk, 1/2 and animal cracker and 3 Ritz crackers.

DS is very small - not even in the 5th percentile and always has been - so I don't expect him to eat huge meals. He's also always been a difficult eater, w/ milk, purees, etc. But w/ table food it's just SUCH a mess.

I see all these kids who gobble down their food happily and ask for more and I'm so envious. Am I doing something wrong??

Chunstad · February 2013

C loves throwing food off his tray. I find that if I stop trying to feed him and busy myself with something else, he'll eat some of his food on his tray. I try not to have a reaction to his food throwing. I stole an idea from someone else here, and have him 'help me' clean up his mess after he's done. He stands by me while I wipe things up and talk about what I'm doing.

jwls84 · February 2013

This is why I hate dinner time! Everything goes on the floor. I try givin him new things, things I know he loved, but nope it all turns in to floor food! Drives me nuts but I too have noticed of I stop focusing on him throwin the food on the floor and ignore the behavior, which lets face it is easier said then done some days, he does eat and stop throwing! I try to do d a balance between engaging him at dinner while ignoring his behavior, but it is hard! Hopefully thy grow out of the food throwing stage soon because I am done with it!

RoxRing · February 2013

Well at least you get him to take those one or two bites. E looks at it, scrunches up his face and refuses it. Sometimes I give him extra frozen french fries in hopes to fill him up. He's also below 5th percentile and won't eat smoothies or bread products. I hear they don't eat well between 1-2, so I'm just going with the flow and will introduce what I'm eating, but make sure I have his standbys ready. Oh, and it's frustrating, but the more I tell myself this is just how it's going to be the easier I take it.

cantalopes24 · February 2013

Its pretty normal. They are looking to see what happens when they do certain things so my advice is to just kind of comment "Oh thats yucky, we dont put food on the floor" the first couple times and pick it up and throw it away. If he keeps doing it say something like "Oh you must be all done, come help Mommy clean up the big mess you made" and have him pick the stuff up off the floor and throw it away or get a little hand held sweeper and a dust pan and have him help clean it up.

I picked up something like this at the dollar store but I also just saw them in Target. Lo holds the dust pan and E sweeps because he loves to clean up.

Scramblersmom · February 2013

I do not know what you have or have not tried but here is my suggestion to take or leave. I would give him his food and let him eat. If he throws it on the floor then he doesn't eat and I would say something like "Since you threw your food on the floor you must not be hungry" and then take him out of his high chair and leave it alone until the next snack/meal. Only let him eat in his high chair for all meals and snacks and try to give them around the same time each day. Do not let him eat anything else outside of regularly scheduled snack or meal times or outside of his highchair. I would think that within a few days he will learn that he must eat at meal/snack time or he goes without until the next meal/snack time and the problem should stop.

Again, this is how I would handle it in my house so take or leave what you wish. I am sorry you are having such a hard time and I can see why you are so frustrated. Lots of hugs to you!

blu-eyedwife · February 2013

Are you putting all of that on his tray at the same time?

For some kids (and I know it's true of mine) a large amount in front of them can be overwhelming, so they start "getting rid" of the excess. Some do arm sweeps of the food, some throw it.

I've found that for us, sometimes only putting 1-2 items on his tray at a time helps. Like 2 strawberries. It's hard to say what goes on in a home when people are posting, but it could be that these people whose kids gobble everything up and ask for more are doing something similar. I know that's how it happens in my house.

We also have him hand us food he isn't interested in and I'll remove it from his tray and not try to give it to him again. That way he learns he doesn't have to throw it. For instance, he used to love mango, so for snack this weekend I cut him a couple slices, leaving the rest off his tray. For some reason he's very anti-mango lately, so he wasn't happy about the slices. He started shaking his head no violently, so I put out my hand and asked if he wanted something else. He handed them to me, and I went and got him some applesauce instead.

karinothing · February 2013

DS has recently started doing this. I use this strategy.

He always eats what we eat, except I make sure to make one of the things we eat something he likes. So I will add side dishes I know he likes (peas and carrots or whatever). Then I give him the food. He makes the choice what to eat. Lately this has been one bite of somethign before saying all done and throwing food across the room. ::sigh::

Anyway, I do not make him an extra meal. From, what I read toddlers do not have to get a balance meal each meal. They balance their diet in a week instead. He eats at daycare and is meeting all his milestones and growing so I am not worried (I won't make extra meals unless he is losing weight).

I haven't had him help pick up, but I tihnk that is a great idea!

wilsontl19191 · February 2013

If I put the food in a bowl and hand him a fork or spoon, he will eat it. If it's on the tray, he usually will not touch it. Weird ss kid! Hahaha!

LCass · February 2013

I don't think you're doing anything wrong. Lily LOVES food and she still throws things on the floor regularly and pitches a fit over mealtime every couple of days. I feel like until they can communicate what they want better, we're all just doing the best we can, which is offering a variety of food and hoping they eat some of it. Sounds to me like your DS actually ate a decent lunch. I'm sorry it was such a battle, though.

Scramblersmom · February 2013

canadiansciencegeek:
karinothing:
He always eats what we eat, except I make sure to make one of the things we eat something he likes. So I will add side dishes I know he likes (peas and carrots or whatever). Then I give him the food. He makes the choice what to eat.
This is us. I find that focusing less on how much she's eating actually results in her eating more.
Also, DD recently started eating for 5 minutes then screaming/gesturing that she wanted out of her highchair. This went on for a week. Then one day I took off the tray and sat her at the table. She's been happy as a clam ever since. (A lot still ends up on the floor - but the screaming has stopped.) Toddlers are weird.

That is an excellent point. We give DS his food on a plate and he sits in his highchair at the table without the tray. I recall now that we tried this hoping that things would go smoother and it seemed to help.

amyc216 · February 2013

My DS is really picky too. A lot of times he won't even try the food we have! I'll start at him with the spoon and he just starts shaking his head or blocking his face with his hands. Or he will be ok until he sees bread and then that's all he'll eat. He doesn't really throw his food, but sometimes he will take his piece and sneakily drop it on the floor. It's hard b/c sometimes I don't know how much he actually ate.

Nita2603 · February 2013

It sounds a lot like the stuff happening here. I wouldn't worry.

CMonkey515 · February 2013

DS will throw his food if I give him too much, or too many different kinds at a time. Kind of like what Blu said, I think he gets overwhelmed. What I do now is I only give him a few bites at a time of one particular item. I keep doing that until he loses interest and starts throwing it. I then move on to the next kind of food and do the same. Then the next, etc. When we've gone through all of the items I'll start over and offer the first food again. Sometimes he'll eat more, sometimes he's done. It's kind of a pain, but it works for us. He eats much better this way.

Elsa1984 · February 2013

Gator does that every time she has a tooth coming in. Right now she has her eye teeth coming in and refuses to actually eat anything. She nibbles on things and throws them around but doesn't actually finish anything.

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