So discouraging! -long

Robeano · February 2013

So as you all probably remember I had troubles breastfeeding, got Hannah's tongue tie released and we had gone a whole week of EBF. It was awesome...

So yesterday I went to a LC appointment, wanted to make sure my latch was good and see if she had any advice on weaning off the nipple shield. Well we weighed Hannah, well last week (on a different scale) she weighted around 10lbs 10oz. Well yesterday on their scale she weighed 10lbs 1oz. So it would appear she is not getting enough milk, very frustrating. So now I have to feed her, pump and supplement at least 1 oz of expressed breast milk, .

Well today I think I was literally either feeding her at the breast, pumping or giving her a bottle from 8am-12. And I am totally dry and the last time I tried to put her on the breast she refused and started crying, cue me crying

I am mostly posting this b/c I think keeping it inside will discourage me I really need encouragement right now. I have this irrational fear that b/c she refused the breast last time she'll totally refuse it. (my hubby pointed out that since I was completely drained she probably refused cuz there was no food there... he makes a good point but I am home alone by myself with a crying child, and I still have lots of hormones)

I'm just so discouraged cuz she is 4 weeks old today and all I've wanted to do is breastfeed her. Why does it have to be so hard? I mean she had a tongue tie, I have low supply. (yes they probably are related, but what if my low supply is due to my PCOS and it won't increase at all!?) Okay, I'm done. thanks for listening.

Dragonfly1226 · February 2013

I was on exactly the same plan when DS was first born because he had severe jaundice. It was bad enough to keep him in the hospital for two days. I remember feeling so overwhelmed and frustrated. It was like I didn't do anything but nurse him and pump! But the good thing is that he gained weight well. Also, I believe the whole experience really helped build my supply because I was pumping after every nursing session. I completely empathize. I know how much it sucks. But it will not be forever, and when you do go back to EBF your supply will be even better. Plus you may start to build a freezer stash. Hang in there Mama! You are doing a great job!!!

Married071709 · February 2013

No advice cause I'm still pg but I wanted to give you some ((((hugs)))).

topaz7777 · February 2013

I remember 3 and 4 weeks old being the hardest. I didn't have supply issues or latching problems, but DD nursed practically non-stop. It's common to have cluster feeding around then, it helps your milk come in. Nurse as much as you can, it gets better.

ELF4321 · February 2013

Did your LC recommend fenugreek or another herbal supplement to increase supply? Although my supply was almost non-existant, they actually did increase it when I took them, just not enough for me to really make a difference. Google More Milk Plus. It comes as a liquid you take by a dropper, or as capsules. The liquid is more effective, but tastes pretty bad.

Also, I assume she recommended some of the standards like almonds, oatmeal, and brewer's yeast tablets to increase supply, plus drinking a ton of water all day.

If you haven't tried those, I would start there and see if it helps. Good luck!

Robeano · February 2013

ELF4321:
Did your LC recommend fenugreek or another herbal supplement to increase supply?nbsp; Although my supply was almost nonexistant, they actually did increase it when I took them, just not enough for me to really make a difference.nbsp; Google More Milk Plus.nbsp; It comes as a liquid you take by a dropper, or as capsules.nbsp; The liquid is more effective, but tastes pretty bad.
Also, I assume she recommended some of the standards like almonds, oatmeal, and brewer's yeast tablets to increase supply, plus drinking a ton of water all day.nbsp;
If you haven't tried those, I would start there and see if it helps.nbsp; Good luck!

Thanks. I've never heard of More Milk. I'm on fenugreek, domperidone, lactation cookies. Drinking lots of water. Hopefully it workd

erkie · February 2013

Robeano:
ELF4321:
Did your LC recommend fenugreek or another herbal supplement to increase supply?nbsp; Although my supply was almost nonexistant, they actually did increase it when I took them, just not enough for me to really make a difference.nbsp; Google More Milk Plus.nbsp; It comes as a liquid you take by a dropper, or as capsules.nbsp; The liquid is more effective, but tastes pretty bad.
Also, I assume she recommended some of the standards like almonds, oatmeal, and brewer's yeast tablets to increase supply, plus drinking a ton of water all day.nbsp;
If you haven't tried those, I would start there and see if it helps.nbsp; Good luck!

Thanks. I've never heard of More Milk. I'm on fenugreek, domperidone, lactation cookies. Drinking lots of water. Hopefully it workd

Actually, I highly recommend More Milk Special Blend. It's got everything that More Milk Plus has, but also adds Goat's Rue. My LC said its especially good for women with PCOS. I have been taking it and it truly works. It's expensive 30 for 120 capsules Amazon, but well worth it in my opinion.

Robeano · February 2013

erkie:
Robeano:
ELF4321:
Did your LC recommend fenugreek or another herbal supplement to increase supply?nbsp; Although my supply was almost nonexistant, they actually did increase it when I took them, just not enough for me to really make a difference.nbsp; Google More Milk Plus.nbsp; It comes as a liquid you take by a dropper, or as capsules.nbsp; The liquid is more effective, but tastes pretty bad.
Also, I assume she recommended some of the standards like almonds, oatmeal, and brewer's yeast tablets to increase supply, plus drinking a ton of water all day.nbsp;
If you haven't tried those, I would start there and see if it helps.nbsp; Good luck!

Thanks. I've never heard of More Milk. I'm on fenugreek, domperidone, lactation cookies. Drinking lots of water. Hopefully it workd

Actually, I highly recommend More Milk Special Blend. It's got everything that More Milk Plus has, but also adds Goat's Rue. My LC said its especially good for women with PCOS. I have been taking it and it truly works. It's expensive 30 for 120 capsules Amazo
n, but well worth it in my opinion.[/
quote]
Oh thank you. I will look into that

IBackBevo · February 2013

I hate to even suggest this because I am sure you have thought of it, but have you considered supplementing with a little formula?

I didn't have a choice because my LO was IUGR, only 5 lbs, on preemie formula and weight loss just couldn't happen. But if you are worried about your LO not getting enough food, it just seems like this might be an option. Sometimes it doesn't have to be an all or nothing sort of thing. And even a few ounces a day of breastmilk has a beneficial effect.

TJ1979 · February 2013

Hey Robeano. (Sorry this got so long.) I'm so sorry you're having such a rough time. The early days of breastfeeding are SO hard. But I promise it does get better if you can just make it to the other side. As far as the weight, don't get too upset yet. Different scales make a big difference, different clothes can make a big difference, dirty diapers make a big difference, and time of day can make a big difference. If one weight was in the afternoon after she had eaten multiple times, and she had a dirty diaper, and was wearing clothes, and the second weight was in the morning when she hadn't eaten much, had a clean diaper, and no outfit on, it can make a pretty big difference. Did you do an actual weighed feeding? Weigh her before and after she eats (in the same diaper even if dirty, same clothes, etc.) and see how much she is actually transferring. You should be able to do this at the LC or your pedi's office, you can rent a scale from a hospital, or you can even buy your own. Watch Hannah - is she happy? Is she having good diaper output? Those are good gauges as to whether she's getting enough or not.

Remember, your boobs are not like a water balloon that gets filled and then gets emptied. They are more like a water hose. There is a constant supply there, sometimes it pours, sometimes it drips, but it's never empty. It is very normal for babies to cluster feed in the evenings, as they are trying to tank up for the night. It's also very normal to have a lower supply in the evenings, but it's fattier, richer milk that helps LO's belly stay full longer.

If you still have supply issues (i.e. the weighed feeding shows she's not getting enough), weaning off the shield might help. Just try latching her without it each feed, and then putting it on if she can't latch. Or, let her latch and get going, then slip it off. I had more luck and less side effects with the more milk plus than with fenugreek. I know how hard low supply can be on you. Breastfeeding is the hardest thing I have ever done. But you can do this. Huge hugs, and keep at it. You're doing a great job.

Are you on metformin for your PCOS?

pb_bride · February 2013

Robeano, first of all, LOTS of hugs to you.

Second, BF is hard work, like really hard! Even though we had no tongue tie issues, and my milk supply was okay, it was still really really hard for me. I can't tell you how many times DH came home from work finding me sitting on the couch in tears while nursing M. But it will get better, I promise you!

Third, if I remember correctly, did you post last week (or the week before) that you were back to pre-pg weight? (if it wasn't you, I apologize.) I'm just wondering if you are eating enough??? BFing needs an additional 500 calories a day, perhaps you're just so exhausted from nursing and pumping that you aren't eating enough?

And fourthly, I agree with pp that it is okay to supplement a little if you think Hannah is still hungry after nursing, just to give yourself a break. A friend of mine was nursing & pumping after every nursing session, & supplementing. This went on for 6 weeks, but now her LO is off all supplement. Your milk supply is still adjusting and it can definitely go up, so don't give up!

Finally, I won't pay too much attention to her "weight loss". It's not the same scale! I wonder why your LC didn't let you use the same scale. Also, can you do a weighed feeding at your next LC appointment? If you don't have another appt, is there a BFing support group meeting you can attend? There's one at my hospital and they have a scale at the meeting so we can do weighed feedings.

Hang in there, Robeano. You are doing a great job and things will get better!

Saraevh · February 2013

I didn't read everyone elses posts, but ugh. It is so frustrating. I went through one helluva time trying to breastfeed my DD and finally just threw in the towel once she hit 5 months. Constant trips to the LC, constant trips to the pedi for weigh ins b/c she kept dropping weight, feeding her, pumping, then feeding her and pumping again 24/7 which was ALL that I did. It was torture! I can't believe I even struggled like that for as long as I did. Looking back I wish I would have quit and enjoyed myself more during that time (NOT that I'm saying you should quit, I'm just trying to make you feel better by letting you know I have been there once before).

With my DS I mostly pumped. I would nurse him if he was fussy or I wanted him to sleep, but every other time I just pumped. I ended up getting a ridiculous supply by doing that (I stopped nursing/pumping altogether when he was 6 months old and my freezer stash is going strong and he will be 9 months old in 4 days). I personally found success with the pump, but I'd say keep trying. You're doing a great job. Really. It is just harder for some!

4legsRbest · February 2013

You have been given some wonderful advice! I only want to offer (((hugs))) and let you know you are not alone. It is so so so so so hard! Don't get too down on yourself and be sure to give her lots of opportunities to nurse, it will get better. And if it doesn't and you explore formula, just know you did everything you could and it isn't the end of the world - we should all be thankful that it exists!

Robeano · February 2013

Thank you everybody, I was crying while reading all your posts, having people to talk to who understand is a big deal. I needed that encouragement!

sbrowns08 · February 2013

I'm really sorry. Breastfeeding is so stinking hard.

My best advice would just be to put your baby to the breast as often as possible. It's the only way I know of to truly build your supply for the long haul.

Hope it only gets better from here!

Whales124 · February 2013

Oh I'm so sorry you are going through this because I know exactly how you feel! Just keep trying and working with the LC if you can, that way they can keep an eye in her weight. It will be okay if you have to supplement, but I know that's not what you want to so right now and that's okay. Hang in there!

Mrs.AmyDylan · February 2013

First, huge hugs.

Pumping, while a total pain is not the enemy. My supply skyrocketed when i pumped.

Im going to agree with weighed feelings.

How is the diaper output?

Are you on a nipple shield? I was told it can cause problems with supply.

Get her on the breast as much as possible. Her mouth on your nipple stimulates your body to adjust your supply.

More hugs! You can do it!!!

diana.filipi · February 2013

I've never had any big issues bf and yet there were occasions where either kid would refuse the breast even though I was pretty sure they were hungry. I just tried to assume they were just fussing and weren't actually hungry.

Hugs and hang in there and make sure they use the same scale to weight next time. Relax if you can. Have a glass of wine, take a bath as soon as baby chills out, drink a glass of water and give it a go when baby stops being chill again.

She has gained weight. Production waxes and wanes even for those with no issues that they know of. Some weeks there's TONS and some weeks things can seem light. For instance, once I got my period back my supply would always drop that week. Just pointing out that a dip in supply due to the tongue tie issue doesn't bode or foretell failure right now. This may just all pass and be a blip!

Hang in there mama. I'll be thinking about you.

imoverit · February 2013

I want to throw those scales out the window. They are all different. In the NICU our little one was weighed A LOT and even if the nurse reweighed him a second later it would be off by ounces. Anyway it sounds like you are doing all you can. BFing is super hard. Keep at it mama if its what you really want to do. I had the hardest time in the beginning with NICU time, low supply, and LOs jaw being out of place. After 2 months I was finally able to EBF. You will get there.

Lferr417 · February 2013

Only advice I have is to let your lo ween her self off the shield. I desperately wanted to sop using it and tried to ween him and he wasn't having it. But about 2 weeks ago he was refusing the shield so I took it off and after a minute of struggle he latched and hasn't looked back since!! She'll let you know when she's ready to drop it. : it's a pain in the buns but some women in the bfing group I go to used a shield the whole time ...

erkie · February 2013

Mrs.AmyDylan:
Are you on a nipple shield? I was told it can cause problems with supply.

From what I researched, the old rubber shields caused supply issues, but the new silicone ones don't. Personally, I had to use one for the first month or so. We were able to transition to just nighttime use around 5-6 weeks and now we don't need it at all. Other women I know used theirs for months or even the whole time they BFed. Robeano- you will know when/if its right to transition off the shield. I thought she'd always need it, and then one day she latched herself on before I could grab it!

Also, have you tried compressions? This site has good info on intake for babies and how to use compressions to increase supply.

https://www.breastfeedinginc.ca/content.php?pagename=doc-BC

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