August 2013 Moms

Just not in the mood

Ok so this may be serious TMI but DH and I have only had sex once since getting pregnant! We had a hard time getting pregnant and he was super paranoid the first 12 weeks, not to mention I was on progesterone suppositories until 11 weeks, since then it seems that either he is too tired or I am. I worry that it's been so long that we just both have lost the urge. How sad?! He's so understanding about what my body's going through but I'm starting to feel that a huge piece of our relationship is missing!
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Re: Just not in the mood

  • Honestly I have no desire at all to have sex. Haven't for a long time either.Thankfully my husband is patient.

     

     

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  • I'm right there with you.

    DH is very understanding so I'm happy about that.
        DS born 8-16-2013
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  • I completely understand.  My sex drive is zero.  I was hoping after the morning sickness let up, I would feel more in the mood, but that just has not happened yet.
    ChasingMyRainbow1
    My Blog: Chasing My Rainbow
    BFP#1 DS 8/28/1996
    BFP #2 5/30/2011 BO 7/13/2011 @ 9w6d
    BFP #3 12/20/2011 MMC 1/26/12 @ 9w1d
    BFP #4 DS2 8/21/2013
    BFP #5 DD1 2/19/2015

    BFP #6 EDD 6/24/2016 It's a girl!!
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  • Also in the same boat! The last time we did it was when we conceived in November.  My DH was pretty paranoid the first trimester, we found out about our 1st loss the day after we had sex for the 1st time in that PG.  He knows that having sex didn't cause the MC ( I had a missed MC and the baby had died a few weeks earlier), but he hasn't been up to doing it.  I've been so very sick that it was the last thing on my mind too!  I think the first few times you may just need to do it even if you aren't in the mood to sort of give your libido a jump start!

    BFP #1 4/10/12 D&C 6/5/12@ 12.5wks EDD 12/17/12
    BFP #2 9/10/12 CP 9/19/12@ 5.5wks EDD 5/21/13
    BFP# 3 12/3/12...Lukas James born 8/15/13
    BFP# 4 8/4/14 EDD 4/13/15

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  • It's normal to feel that way.

    H and I use to have sex about everyday. Once I became pregnant, I was too nauseous. Once I started to move past the morning sickness, I fell and fractured my tailbone. So my poor DH has been without for a long long while! Bless his heart, he is so patient and understanding.

             

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  • Totally understandable. As long as the two of you keep an open communication about the situation, I'm sure things will pick back up sooner or later. Sex is one of those things where the more you have it, the more you want it. Just be honest and understanding with each other.
    "The cleaning, the scrubbing will wait til tomorrow,
    For children grow up, as I've learned to my sorrow.
    So, quiet down cobwebs. Dust go to sleep.
    I'm rocking my baby and babies don't keep."
  • I have absolutely no desire to have sex, and unfortunately my DH is acting like a child about it. He also sits on his ass as soon as he gets home from work while I am doing chores and working until I go to sleep at night, so not only am I exhausted because I'm pregnant, I'm exhausted from busting my ass every night. Sex is not going to be in the picture until he starts pitching in. 
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  • Can totally relate! My husband won't touch me with a ten foot pole. He is totally worried about having sex and that it will hurt the baby. No matter how much I tell him it won't he doesn't seem to get it. Although Ive been too tired to have sex I'm hoping he will come around one of these weeks!
  • We haven't had sex since we found out that I was pregnant. I have zero desire and DH has been very understanding about it. I feel bad, but I am just not feeling it!

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  • I wish that was kind of the case for me I'm like an addict right now DH can't keep up so I get moody. I hear for some your libido boosts in the second tri
  • Same boat here.  It also doesnt help that my hubby is only home for 10 days a month, and of course those 10 days are generally when I am feeling the most tired and just not in the mood at all. 

    I am lucky enough that he understands.  He is happy with just a good old fashioned cuddle on the couch which is always nice.  Smile

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  • WHEW!  So glad I'm not alone!!  I keep waiting for that 2nd tri desire to kick in but so far....no where in sight!
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  • I think a lot of us feel like this! Personally, I'm just now getting back to actually having any kind of desire, but I'm at that stage where I still just feel fat and not attractive, so its hard for me to really get into it :

    Me: 28 DH: 33

    DD: Born 7/30/13, 2 years old

    TTC #2: August 2015


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  • I was nauseous and uncomfortably bloated most of the first part of the pregnancy, and then I had spotting one morning after we'd had sex and it freaked us out enough to abstain for awhile. Between that and a yeast infection (oh the joys of pregnancy hormones) we haven't done the deed very much either. I think eventually you just need to go for it and your body will respond and get into it. 
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