I Feel Like A Bad Mom

rsideemd · February 2013

LO still sleeps in her swing, is rocked at bedtime, and has a bottle immediately before she's put down for the night. Every article or book I see says all of those things are wrong and I shouldn't be doing any of them.

Maybe it's the hormones (that time of the month) talking, but it just makes me feel like I'm a terrible mom and I'm screwing up.

I've tried to change some of these things in the past, but it hasn't worked yet... so we're doing what does work for us.

Just venting I guess and wondering if anyone else ever feels like this.

CdnFarmGirl08 · February 2013

My LO does all of that as well (except the swing- has always hated it). He will only fall sleep if he is nursing and has to be rocked to sleep in his carseat for some naps.

I've stopped worrying about it- he's happy and so am I. I'm not changing things right now that are working for me. There were times that I thought how I was "screwing him up" later and have realized that he will be ok in the long run.

You're doing fine. Stop beating yourself up over it- you are taking care of your child and she is healthy and happy!

ndruley · February 2013

Don't feel bad! DD will be 6 months tomorrow and tonight was the first night I haven't nursed/rocked her to sleep! She does sleep in her crib but that was totally on accident when H's Aunt put her down in it one night while visiting and it was the first night she had slept for 4 hours straight so figured we would keep doing it!

You have to do what is best for you and your LO. Don't let anyone else make you feel like you are doing something wrong!! Just my opinion.

Jimsgirl5821 · February 2013

I feed/rock DS to sleep and I did it with DD to. She learned to STTN. She is 3 now and she has a glass of warm milk, is read a couple books and given a kiss goodnight and she falls asleep on her own. I sometimes think I should get DS to self sooth to sleep, but I remember I didn't ruin DD this way

itsmevkb · February 2013

At some point you'll hit your stride as a mom and realize that being rocked to sleep or sleeping in a swing has never stopped a child from learning to walk, talk, read, or grow up to be a great human being. In the big picture of life these are very, very, very small things. Whatever works for your child is what's right.

lexmtown · February 2013

itsmevkb:
At some point you'll hit your stride as a mom and realize that being rocked to sleep or sleeping in a swing has never stopped a child from learning to walk, talk, read, or grow up to be a great human being.nbsp; In the big picture of life these are very, very, very small things.nbsp;nbsp; Whatever works for your child is what's right.

Well said. Living in the moment and doing what works for us. Seems like every time LO gets in a routine something changes or he wants something different any way. I used to worry that I was nursing him to sleep too often and now he barely does it. Got to go with the flow. :

erin922 · February 2013

DD had to have a bottle then rocked to sleep for every nap and bedtime and did only sleep in her swing until about 4 months old when I went back to work and she had no choice but to sleep in a crib. Eventually she didn't have a bottle for naps or bedtime, but I rocked her to sleep until she was probably a good year old. I didnt have to wean her from the bottle at bedtime or rocking to sleep, i think both just kind of ended on their own somehow. I didn't care what people said, I enjoyed that quiet time with her. She is now 3 and goes to sleep on her own with no problems. DS refuses to fall asleep in my arms and I have to say I kind of wish he would so I could have that quiet time with him too!

Heavenisaplace · February 2013

Stop reading those stupid articles. You are NOT a bad mom.

laurakaz13 · February 2013

We rocked DD until 11 months and she had bottles before bed until around 19 months. She has slept 12+ hours a night since 3 months and is the happiest, most easy to deal with toddler in the world.

But yeah, I guess I'm a bad mom. Indifferent

Newsie96 · February 2013

I have always thought, "there has to be some sort of instinct involved in raising a baby, and not all by the book" and our pediatrician agrees. You know what your baby needs, you know him or her best! If the baby needs to be rocked, rock him. If he needs to sleep in a swing, go with it. (My daughter take every morning nap in her swing.) As long as your LO is happy, don't stress. Our doctor says you can't spoil a baby, they have needs, not wants, at this age.

Kissty · February 2013

I am so glad I am not alone. I was telling DH that I needed to keep trying putting him down awake (when I try he gets so upset). Hubs asked why he likes to be rocked. He says when he's old enough to understand go to bed we'll deal with it then. After thinking about it and joking that I'd rock him to sleep every night until he went away to college, I realized Hubs is right. I like rocking him to sleep and knowing he is enjoying it too. He sometimes wakes MOTN, but he can put himself back to sleep so I guess I haven't ruined him yet. Just keep doing what you're doing and I'll keep doing what I'm doing. Love those babies and we'll keep rocking until they will no longer allow it.

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