October 2011 Moms

Hitting

Has anyone else's LOs started hitting? L has started to act out towards the dog and towards me.

I've realized that our dog must be a saint because he hasn't even growled at her when she grabs his ears/pulls his fur/hits his face.  He just sits there and takes it, and looks at me like he's trying to say "please get her off me Mom". 

I feel like all I've been saying all day is "L, no hitting, be nice to the doggy". I pull her away from the dog and make sure she is not distracted by anything else when I'm telling her this, but I know that she is only 15 months old, so how much can she truly comprehend?

Should I be doing anything differently to make her understand better? For the BTDT moms, what worked for you?

I'm nervous that our saint of a dog is only going to be able to tolerate so much of her bullying before he snaps. He is just a dog after all. 

In short.. help me! :-)

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Re: Hitting

  • You're not alone. DD has a set of plastic golf clubs. Earlier, she was running around with the driver chasing our dogs like a mad lady. She's a tad violent.

    She will also pinch and hit. I just grab her hands when she's doing it and tell her no, that's not nice, we don't hit, pinch, etc. I'm frustrated with it too.  

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  • I am in the same boat. Any advice would be great!

    DD pulls at the dogs face and like Shannon said, I'm worried he is going to snap. I separate them and tell her no, but she finds it funny.
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  • DD slapped me in the face one day. I was shocked, and she realized pretty quickly that she did wrong. She grabbed my face and kissed me. We usually say no in a very stern voice, followed by that's not nice.
  • Lily's rough with the cats, but not in a mean way.  Her love just knows no bounds.  Wink  One cat handles it really well (takes it or just runs away), the other is hit and miss (sometimes he almost seems to enjoy it, other times he'll snap at her but not actually bite her).

    We definitely went through a hitting, pinching and scratching stage recently.  She mostly does it to me, not other people (makes sense since we spend the most time together).  I hold her hands so she can't hit/pinch/scratch me, tell her no, that's not nice, that hurts mommy, etc.  Most of the time she seemed to think this was a game and then she would do it more, so then I would remove her from me and not let her get close enough that she could hit/pinch/scratch me.  She's mostly over it now (although she does hit objects like the couch or my computer when she gets upset with me sometimes).

    We also taught her to "make nice" - gently stroke a person's cheek.  We tell her that and "be gentle" when she's getting rough with us, someone else or the cats.  (Note: the "make nice" did NOT work well when she was in the scratching stage - she would claw at my cheek.)

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  • LBB hits - mostly when he's tired I've found.  We make him show us "gentle touch" and then redirect.  (Or if he's one of those spitfire moods, we just redirect.)

    He also goes after the dog with the hitting, but we always keep an eye on the two, and move him away before he can get close.  We don't even allow unsupervised petting - even though my dog wouldn't hurt a flea (ehhh, that's a lie.  He does go after spiders).  I just don't need to test the boundaries, y'know?  We also make sure my dog has lots of safe spots (couch/bed) that he can get to to avoid LBB.  I don't know what we're going to do when LBB can climb up on those spaces, but hopefully he'll be old enough to comprehend more at that time.

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  • imageLCass:

    Lily's rough with the cats, but not in a mean way.  Her love just knows no bounds.  Wink  One cat handles it really well (takes it or just runs away), the other is hit and miss (sometimes he almost seems to enjoy it, other times he'll snap at her but not actually bite her).

    We definitely went through a hitting, pinching and scratching stage recently.  She mostly does it to me, not other people (makes sense since we spend the most time together).  I hold her hands so she can't hit/pinch/scratch me, tell her no, that's not nice, that hurts mommy, etc.  Most of the time she seemed to think this was a game and then she would do it more, so then I would remove her from me and not let her get close enough that she could hit/pinch/scratch me.  She's mostly over it now (although she does hit objects like the couch or my computer when she gets upset with me sometimes).

    We also taught her to "make nice" - gently stroke a person's cheek.  We tell her that and "be gentle" when she's getting rough with us, someone else or the cats.  (Note: the "make nice" did NOT work well when she was in the scratching stage - she would claw at my cheek.)

    I could've written the exact same thing! Luckily, she hasn't discovered scratching (yet), but I'll make sure to watch out for saying "make nice" or "be gentle" during that phase lol.

    Not that I wish any of our LOs were hitting/scratching/etc, but it does make me feel a little more at ease knowing that L is not some crazy undisciplined toddler running around. She's actually "normal"! haha.

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  • The scratching was short-lived (thankfully) and mostly seemed to be because she suddenly realized she had finger nails.  If L starts that stage, my best advice is KEEP HER NAILS SHORT!  I have a tendency to let Lily's get too long, which sure as hell doesn't help.

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  • imageblu-eyedwife:

    LBB hits - mostly when he's tired I've found.  We make him show us "gentle touch" and then redirect.  (Or if he's one of those spitfire moods, we just redirect.)

    He also goes after the dog with the hitting, but we always keep an eye on the two, and move him away before he can get close.  We don't even allow unsupervised petting - even though my dog wouldn't hurt a flea (ehhh, that's a lie.  He does go after spiders).  I just don't need to test the boundaries, y'know?  We also make sure my dog has lots of safe spots (couch/bed) that he can get to to avoid LBB.  I don't know what we're going to do when LBB can climb up on those spaces, but hopefully he'll be old enough to comprehend more at that time.

    I definitely am going to try to take note of when she starts hitting more... I wonder if her being tired has anything to do with it... that would make sense IMO.

    Our dog's bed is on the floor, mainly because he's too big to have his bed on the couch (a little over 60lbs), and L usually doesn't go over to it, but I have caught her a few times trying to lay down on it lol.

    Also.. I'm not sure if this is helping or hurting the situation, but any time L hurts the dog (he yelped pretty loudly today when she grabbed his ear) I make sure to praise the dog and bring L with me to give the dog a treat.  Maybe that is more beneficial for the dog to realize he's being good than for L to realize she's being bad... I'm not sure.

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  • I hear ya! If someone had some magic to get the hitting to stop, please share! I say 'no' 'no hitting' 'that's not nice' sometimes I try to ignore it to see if he is just doing it to get a reaction and not reinforce the behavior with attention, that didn't work either! It's annoying and hope this is a short lived phase!
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  • DD doesn't hit fortunately, but she does like to harass the cat, grabbing his tail or his face or trying to step on him.  Telling her "no" doesn't stop it, I usually have to go over and get her to back off.  We tell her "gentle" and show her how to pet the kitty nicely instead.  Now if I see her heading toward the cat, I tell her to "be gentle".  That often seems to keep her from becoming too aggressive.  We use gentle a lot these days, in reference to other kids, books, kitties, etc.   
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