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Choosing God Parents

ehicksehicks member
in Babies: 0 - 3 Months

My husbands side of the family isn't super religious. He has a brother but he doesn't attend church, so obviously he wouldn't be a great choice. I feel bad that we can't use anyone on his side, but I believe that god parents are a big part of a child's life, so I don't want to choose just anyone.

For DD1 we picked my brother and sister-in-law. They attend church regularly and discuss religion in their house to their kids, so I think they are a good example. Also I am the god mother to their two kids.

Is it odd to pick the same people for both kids? I figured I would have them be DD2s god parents but I didn't know if I should give someone else the chance, since it is so special.

I have one girl cousin on my side of the family and we are super close because we are the only girls. She is only 19 but she is really smart and responsible, goes to college, and attends church. She even goes to a catholic college.

Her oldest brother is really close with me too. I am the youngest in my family and he was born after me, so I always treated him like a little brother. He too went to a catholic college, goes to church weekly... but 2 years ago he had a lot of personal issues. He got caught up in a bad group of friends and started using heroin. Once the family found out we had an intervention and got him sent to a rehab where he did extremely well. He has been clean for over a year, went back to school for counseling, and goes back to the rehab monthly to mentor the younger kids who are there and struggling. He really took his experience and turned it into a positive thing and I'm super proud of him.

I was thinking of having these two as DD2s godparents, but I wasn't sure since they are young and we did have these recent issues with my male cousin.

WWYD? Should I just have my brother and SIL be the godparents or allow someone else to step into the role? 

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Re: Choosing God Parents

  • rjeller32rjeller32 member
    I don't think it's weird to have the same god parents for two children, in fact, I prefer it because the duty of God Parents is to actually take our place if we pass on, and I wouldn't want my children to go to two different couples. But that's how my family views god parents, mine are like my back up parents since I can remember.
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  • aklessigaklessig member
    We have the same situation as you only it's my family who are not members of our church. We went ahead and picked my husbands sister and her husband. No one in my family was offended and they respected that we take choosing godparents so seriously. So I would go ahead and go with your bro and sil.
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  • candr09candr09 member
    I'm not religious AT ALL but I feel like the god parents should be two people who share your religious views and can help you in guiding your children. I wouldn't count out your cousins based on age or the past drug problems. I work in drug and alcohol treatment and have seen plenty of people turn their lives around after drug addiction. A lot of people actually use religion to help them get through it and their faith gets stronger through the program.
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  • rnfromtnrnfromtn member
    None of our siblings are religious, so that knocked all of them out.  We choose our Godparents based on how highly we regard them as people and their values.  I think of Godparents as role models, not just religiously, but emotionally and socially too.  The people we picked are not highly religious, but have the same religious views as we do.  I became a Godmother when I was 19, and don't think I was too young at that time.  If you are close to your cousins, I don't see the problem in making them Godparents. 
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  • abbp23abbp23 member
    I also view Godparents as the back up in case something happens to me and DH. I wouldnt want my kids split up if we died.
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  • abbp23abbp23 member

    We have have ours set up that way in our living trust. Just going through the church doesn't give the godparents legal gaurdianship unless it is made legally docutmented from my understanding. Our attorney told use that if there is no legal document stating who gets your child that they will end up with a relative... which could mean a huge custody battle between family members after you are gone.

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