Navy wives come in... — The Bump
Military Families

Navy wives come in...

Hi ladies! I have a few questions if you don't mind. DH is very seriously considering enlisting in the Navy in the very near future. We have an 11 month old. We have talked to different military families about different things, but none of them had families when they enlisted. The big question I have is regarding when DH is in tech school. My understanding is that we wouldn't be eligible to live on base with him during that time? If this is the case, is it common for spouses and children to live near where their spouse is in tech school (if they are in one of the longer programs)? I'm not sure how long he will be in school, and I am sure it depends on what he is studying. I hope my question makes sense. Also, if you could give me any insight regarding being a Navy wife. I appreciate it!!! TIA 

Me (33). DH (37). DD (2.2012). MCs x4. After 4 years & 7 months, due 4.2018!


Re: Navy wives come in...

  • I'm a Marine wife and although we don't have a baby yet I can tell you how the process went for us. We were married about a year and a half before he enlisted. And it took about a year for all of his training to be completed. Since we were married before he enlisted, he received BAH the entire time we were apart. It was based off of the zip code where I was living. So basically he was receiving and extra 1400 a month to support his dependent (me). With that being said, your husband will receive BAH as well. What you decide to do with that money is up to you.

    As far as I know, MOS schools have to be longer than 6 months (not quite sure on the number) for you to be able to go with him. That doesn't guarantee that he will be assigned a house on base. You are more than welcome to find an apartment and use the BAH to pay for it. I've known spouses to do this. And it also doesn't guarantee that he will be able to come home every night or weekend either. My husband had a lot of events he was "voluntold" to do so he didn't have the freedom he thought he would. I know all branches are different but the Marines are a part of the Navy so I can't see them being much different. For us, with my job and his base pay plus the extra allowances, I was able to visit him monthly. My best advice, and I mean this in the best possible way, if he joins the Navy you will have to get used to not having him around. Their job comes before everything. It's hard at first but it gets so much easier. I love our life and where we are and I wouldn't change it for the world. Being a milso has its ups and downs and you'll be surprised at how strong it makes you. 

     My husband is crash/fire/rescue (basically a firefighter) so he works odd shifts. He's gone 15 full days out of the month, 6 months out of the year. His school was 4 months long so I didn't find that it'd be worth it to move with him. I just sucked it up and stayed at home until he got his orders. I wish you luck though!! Let me know if you have any questions.  

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  • I think it is that the Navy will not move you to his tech school because he'll only be there for a short while. That being said, I think he can choose to live where he wants at that point (govt or private housing). So you could move with him (at your own cost).

    We aren't enlisted, but I've got a few friends who were. So I hope I'm remembering their situations correctly. 

    Gabriel 09-11-2012 No dairy, egg, peanuts, tree nuts
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    DH deployed since July 22
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  • Some of whether you can live on base is probably housing company related. Lincoln Military Housing won't accept applicants with orders less than a year at the location.
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  • I am enlisted in the navy. Just got out of my A School a few months ago which is what you are referring to as tech school. The school has to be 6 months or longer and he would have to get on doing the paperwork right when he gets there to make sure its approved. If you do not end up staying with him he will stay in the barracks they provide and you are not allowed to stay the night. Most barracks will not even allow a female in his room wether you are his wife or not. He will have time that he can go in town and may even be allowed an over night on the weekend.
    When I went to school I left my husband and son at home till we could move to my permanent duty station. He came to visit me once when I got a weekend free. Other than that I didn't have much time to hang out so it would have been pointless to have them move.
  • I'm an almost Navy wife, since my husband just enlisted and is leaving for bootcamp in June. This is what we have been told:

    His first contract was for a job that had a 12 month A School (or tech school). We were told I could move with him and we could have base housing because it was a year long. 

    Now he has a new contract for SWCC, and his school is about 9 months long, but divided into shorter sections (4 weeks here, 5 weeks there). We haven't had a very clear answer as to whether I can go with him, though it's looking more like "no". I think the reason is that SWCC training is a lot more intense than most other schools, so family would be too much of a distraction.

    Our baby is due just before he leaves for SWCC training, so I'm really bummed that he really won't see his own kid until he/she is almost a year old! But, since he will probably be deployed that long anyway from time to time, I'm just taking it as his first deployment and practicing living as a Navy wife!

  • imagecarlavz:
    I'm an almost Navy wife, since my husband just enlisted and is leaving for bootcamp in June. This is what we have been told:His first contract was for a job that had a 12 month A School or tech school. We were told I could move with him and we could have base housing because it was a year long.nbsp;Now he has a new contract for SWCC, and his school is about 9 months long, but divided into shorter sections 4 weeks here, 5 weeks there. We haven't had a very clear answer as to whether I can go with him, though it's looking more like "no". I think the reason is that SWCC training is a lot more intense than most other schools, so family would be too much of a distraction.Our baby is due just before he leaves for SWCC training, so I'm really bummed that he really won't see his own kid until he/she is almost a year old! But, since he will probably be deployed that long anyway from time to time, I'm just taking it as his first deployment and practicing living as a Navy wife!


    The first thing you will learn is that you can't really plan for anything in the military. If he is "contracted" now that doesn't mean that it is written in stone. I've known guys getting their MOS changed involuntarily of course a couple weeks before graduation from bootcamp! Recruiters are meant to sell the military...and they often stretch the truth as well. My husband was told that deployments are only 7 months and you get a 14 month period afterwards where you're not deployable. Complete BS. There is a unit that leaves early next year and they get back at the end of next month...just an example. SO many things can go wrong, there can be injuries, and waits for training...it can be a long and drawn out process. I found out in a letter at about week 11 that my husband scored high enough on his final tests to qualify for his MOS. week 11 of 13 for Marine Bootcamp So basically don't have your heart set on anything until it actually happens...
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  • You never can plan to far ahead being military wife. The military even had a bit of a say so in my wedding date!! And got one weeks notice on his last deployment that was a hell of a week. My husbands school was something like 2 and half years but we werent together then. I wouldn't worry to much about base housing you probably can find something cheaper in the area and have money left over. I am not in San Diego anymore but there they take all your BH which I think with dependent is almost $2000. My rent was $1500 and included all utilities so it was better for us to live off base. In school they get time off just like a normal job so if you want to live close to him rent a small place until he gets orders. Every rental property has a military clause if you have to move before lease is up.

     

  • My advise to you and your LO to stay put where you are until he gets his orders to his first duty station which he will find out DURING tech school. This way, the Navy will completely pay for your move and your belongings. It will be less stressful for everyone. Usually during Tech school they have to live in their barracks anyway (lots of check ins, rules, etc.) So you wouldn't get to see him much, if at all, anyway, and you would be living in a new environment with a little kid, with probably half of your stuff, by yourself with nothing to do. I don't advise it. 


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