Using the word No..

wntrgrl83 · February 2013

Anyone else saying no to the LO's yet? Being stern/ with a louder voice if they are doing something that they shouldn't be? Anyone feel guilty after doing so?? I'm just curious because a lot of my girlfriends have mixed feelings on this topic

SteelCity44 · February 2013

I do it almost daily, and he absolutely knows what it means. Sometimes he chooses to obey, and sometimes he chooses to carry on his own way after acknowledging me. I usually only give him one or two with a pause inbetween/chance to stop the behavior before redirecting him. I'm not big on the "No, no, no, no no" kind of thing. What's terribly hilarious/awful is that now I hear him say "Uh, oh" right before he's about to do something he shouldn't. It gives me a moment to prevent the behavior if it's actually going to be dangerous and not just messy (grabbing a plug vs throwing everything off of the coffee table onto the floor again).

AmyJoy728 · February 2013

I do it! With twins, you are going to need something to help you redirect/get their attention as they aren't usually doing/abt to do something at the same spot lol.

Peepp79 · February 2013

I've said it a few times. I've gotten the look like shes saying, "what?" (with a cute face) . Also, I've used the first and middle name exclamation. That worked yesterday...hahaha.

Steel, that's funny about the "uh oh comment"..so cute

KatFCo · February 2013

I usually will call his name and say no. His big thing right now is playing with/pulling himself up on the TV stand and cable boxes. If I say somewhat loudly and sternly, "Caleb, no!" he'll sometimes stop sit back and look at me. Sometimes he doesn't pay attention so I clap to get his attention.

I'm curious, do you have friends who don't think you should say no to them?

wntrgrl83 · February 2013

KatFCo, I actually do. They tell me that it can damage them... and part of me feels guilty. I had to be stern this morning with DS and it ended up breaking my heart doing so, but I know they need to learn what is right and what is wrong....

KatFCo · February 2013

wntrgrl83:
KatFCo, I actually do. They tell me that it can damage them... and part of me feels guilty. I had to be stern this morning with DS and it ended up breaking my heart doing so, but I know they need to learn what is right and what is wrong....

Not teling a child no and not setting boundaries can damage them. Don't feel guilty for teaching your child safety and right from wrong at an early age.

Now, if you were getting out the switch or screaming at him, that would be a different story, but saying no? It's an absolute must and you're being a good mom by teaching him boundaries. Don't feel guilty.

gracefulash · February 2013

We started months ago. She now can shake her head no when she doesn't want something.

schmood · February 2013

We use NO all the time. However, most of the time, DS thinks the word is hilarious. Like he'll be going for a cord and we say "W, NO!" He'll stop, look at us, smile, laugh and then go right back to trying to get the cord. He knows to look when we say it, but does not obey it as of yet.

MMC0927 · February 2013

We tell her no, then tell her why... Like, "NO, A, that is boo-boos" if she is trying to do something that would hurt her. Or "NO, A, it hurts Mommy when you pull her hair that hard." We don't raise our voices, (in general - not even at each other), but we use a stern voice. She damn well knows what NO means... but she likes to blow me off sometimes. It's pretty cute that way she does it...

SteelCity44 · February 2013

KatFCo:

I'm curious, do you have friends who don't think you should say no to them?

There was a big debate about this on 9-12 awhile back, because some women would never use the word "No" with their LO for fear of it A: being their kid's first word, B: damaging their self esteem, or C: opening up the can of worms to have the kid start refusing things. Several of them wouldn't say "No," but would say "we don't play with ____ because it can hurt us. Here, why don't you play with ____ because it's safer."

I don't know about you, but I wouldn't get 4 words into that sentence before the kid has crawled to the other side of the room to find something else to do that he shouldn't be doing. "No!"

MMC0927 · February 2013

SteelCity44:
KatFCo:

I'm curious, do you have friends who don't think you should say no to them?

There was a big debate about this on 9-12 awhile back, because some women would never use the word "No" with their LO for fear of it A: being their kid's first word, B: damaging their self esteem, or C: opening up the can of worms to have the kid start refusing things. Several of them wouldn't say "No," but would say "we don't play with ____ because it can hurt us. Here, why don't you play with ____ because it's safer."

I don't know about you, but I wouldn't get 4 words into that sentence before the kid has crawled to the other side of the room to find something else to do that he shouldn't be doing. "No!"

The word NO sets boundaries, lets them know what they are doing is not okay. Kids need boundaries! I tell her NO, then go on... but always the stern NO. Like Micah, Athena would be at the other side of the room finding something else to do that she shouldn't be doing.

Sketchipyro · February 2013

schmood:
We use NO all the time. However, most of the time, DS thinks the word is hilarious. Like he'll be going for a cord and we say "W, NO!" He'll stop, look at us, smile, laugh and then go right back to trying to get the cord. He knows to look when we say it, but does not obey it as of yet.

This is exactly us! DD just looks at me and smiles a devilish grin like she knows but doesnt care. And its hard for me to keep stern when she does that because she's freaking too cute. At some point I know I need to stay stern but dang its hard to do right now.

KatFCo · February 2013

SteelCity44:
KatFCo:

I'm curious, do you have friends who don't think you should say no to them?

There was a big debate about this on 9-12 awhile back, because some women would never use the word "No" with their LO for fear of it A: being their kid's first word, B: damaging their self esteem, or C: opening up the can of worms to have the kid start refusing things. Several of them wouldn't say "No," but would say "we don't play with ____ because it can hurt us. Here, why don't you play with ____ because it's safer."

I don't know about you, but I wouldn't get 4 words into that sentence before the kid has crawled to the other side of the room to find something else to do that he shouldn't be doing. "No!"

Yeah, I guess I have met people like that; their kids took forever to understand how to obey because they had no idea what their parents were saying the first several months. Babies don't understand such complex sentences.

shealy12 · February 2013

SteelCity44:
I do it almost daily, and he absolutely knows what it means. Sometimes he chooses to obey, and sometimes he chooses to carry on his own way after acknowledging me. I usually only give him one or two with a pause inbetween/chance to stop the behavior before redirecting him. I'm not big on the "No, no, no, no no" kind of thing. What's terribly hilarious/awful is that now I hear him say "Uh, oh" right before he's about to do something he shouldn't. It gives me a moment to prevent the behavior if it's actually going to be dangerous and not just messy (grabbing a plug vs throwing everything off of the coffee table onto the floor again).

HAHA!! What a little stink!

We do tell Blake no sometimes. He's not crawling or walking (without assistance yet) - just scooting on his butt so he doesn't get into too much trouble. He's starting biting my shoulder sometimes, and I'll tell him 'No biting' He has to have some way of realizing that whatever he's doing is not right.

GAPeach68 · February 2013

KatFCo:
wntrgrl83:
KatFCo, I actually do. They tell me that it can damage them... and part of me feels guilty. I had to be stern this morning with DS and it ended up breaking my heart doing so, but I know they need to learn what is right and what is wrong....
Not teling a child no and not setting boundaries can damage them. Don't feel guilty for teaching your child safety and right from wrong at an early age.
Now, if you were getting out the switch or screaming at him, that would be a different story, but saying no? It's an absolute must and you're being a good mom by teaching him boundaries. Don't feel guilty.

This. In a few years you may not want to be friends with these people that can't tell their kids no. I have never heard something so ridiculous. How will a kid learn what they can and can't do? What is a parent for? Do these people think they need to be their kids "friends"? Crazy. On a lighter note, my little man tries to use his charm when I say "no" and literally grins at me in a flirty, "but I'm so cute" manner. How do they learn that so early??

MechanicMama1 · February 2013

I do.. Travis deff know what no means... Sometimes he grunts when I say it but usually he stops, then I direct him to something else.

wntrgrl83 · February 2013

Thanks for all of the replys. I definitely agree with teaching DS and DD the difference between right and wrong, and doing it the right way. I am very similar to what you have all written above.

mars724 · February 2013

I tell them no. and with two, sometimes it's a matter of safety, if i'm busy with one, they need to learn now when to stop doing something that's going to get them hurt.

I felt a little bad when I freaked and said no really loud once at Alex when she was about to eat some paint, then she cried. =(

marriedsisterofbride · February 2013

We have used no since Willow was around 7 or 8 months old not really sternly until recently. I believe the parents job is to protect their child and part of that is giving their children the security in knowing mom and dad are in charge.

BabyMakes6 · February 2013

Sketchipyro:
schmood:
We use NO all the time.  However, most of the time, DS thinks the word is hilarious. Like he'll be going for a cord and we say "W, NO!" He'll stop, look at us, smile, laugh and then go right back to trying to get the cord. He knows to look when we say it, but does not obey it as of yet.
This is exactly us! DD just looks at me and smiles a devilish grin like she knows but doesnt care. And its hard for me to keep stern when she does that because she's freaking too cute. At some point I know I need to stay stern but dang its hard to do right now.

All of this.

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