Not Announcing on Facebook

famba · February 2013

Anyone else not announcing on Facebook? What are your reasons for not doing so?

BelhurstBride · February 2013

It's just not me.

Cristine · February 2013

I didn't plan on it. I'm very paranoid about something going wrong so I was content to wait until the baby is actually here. My mother however announced it on her page this morning so I may have to rethink things.

goatgirlnyc · February 2013

Nope.

But in the spirit of full disclosure, I don't have a Facebook account. I guess I should save this for the "Unpopular Opinion" thread but I hate Facebook. I just don't get it. I mean I GET it but...it's just not for me. I'm telling everybody by telephone or in person.

beanbag2013 · February 2013

I probably won't. I'm just not a big poster. H and I are in the process of telling all our friends and family now so a fb announcement won't be necessary. Although, I will be posting pictures of my little angel once s/he's born.

MommyAmes2 · February 2013

I know several people who didn't put their pregnancy on facebook until around 20 weeks. They just didn't post much and didn't want to announce.

Eventually though people knew and it was hard to keep it a secret from the "facebook world." People would post on their walls and such gave it away anyway.

kateisgreat · February 2013

I won't be making a FB announcement. I'm not going to hide it if anyone makes a comment or posts a picture that shows me with a bump, but anyone who needs to know that I'm pg will be told directly by either me or DH. FB can find out when I post photos of the baby.

kajordan09 · February 2013

I won't be either. I'm more of a private person and would rather tell my friends and family in person. For those I won't see in person, they will get a phone call or an email. I'd rather make it much more personal than blast it on FB.

catskitch · February 2013

we're not either. I will probably post a photo when the baby is born, but that's about it. We don't really post that much, and DH doesn't even want pics of the kid when it's born either.

people we talk to outside of fb know already, so the people who don't know are not close close friends.

brockerln · February 2013

We're not announcing on FB. DH likes to keep our lives pretty private. I also have 400+ friends on FB, many of whom I do not speak to on a regular basis and I do not feel the need to share this with them. However, we've pretty much told all of our family and friends at this point. I may need to private message a few friends on FB who live out of state or out of the country of the good news.

I figure that the rest will find out when we have the newborn pics up.

iriscarmendiaz · February 2013

brockerln:
We're not announcing on FB. DH likes to keep our lives pretty private. I also have 400+ friends on FB, many of whom I do not speak to on a regular basis and I do not feel the need to share this with them. However, we've pretty much told all of our family and friends at this point. I may need to private message a few friends on FB who live out of state or out of the country of the good news.
I figure that the rest will find out when we have the newborn pics up.

Same here. I've got nearly 300 "friends" on Facebook. Many of them are people who I have either friended them years ago and forgot about or I am mildly curious to see how they are doing. I did most of my announcing by phone (a couple by IM) since I live 3,000 miles away from everyone I know. I specifically asked everyone (except 1 person I forgot) to keep it OFF Facebook. She *my cousin) went ahead and posted it and tagged me in it. I asked her to please untag me and she threw a fit and hasn't spoken to me since. If I'm not posting my own news on Facebook, what makes her think she has the right to do so?

In any case, many people follow me on Facebook but I never hear from them at any point in the year, so I'm not interested in posting my private life there for them to gawk at. When I made my wedding invite list, I didn't invite anyone (including family) who hadn't spoken to me in any form over a year, so why should near strangers know my good news?

Cosmic+Love · February 2013

kateisgreat:
I won't be making a FB announcement. I'm not going to hide it if anyone makes a comment or posts a picture that shows me with a bump, but anyone who needs to know that I'm pg will be told directly by either me or DH.

All of this. I am on Facebook, but I don't normally post.

cnthrdlywt2bwZ · February 2013

I probably will down the road. Up to this point, mostly just family knows and a few friends but until I've told my best friends I'm not rushing to post online.

I'm not a big poster but my relatives use it a lot to talk to me. I'll do it eventually just so my family knows it's okay to say something publicly.

virginiamama85 · February 2013

We won't be specifically announcing, but at some point it won't be a secret anymore and I am sure people will post on my wall asking about it. I generally don't post much on facebook, but don't go out of my way to keep things a secret either, if that makes sense :-)

piperjayne · February 2013

I never announced last time. My mom tagged me in a picture when I was about 6 months along and that was the first most of my Facebookonly friends heard of it.
I'm still.undecided on what I'll do this time.

JilllyBean · February 2013

I am not going to. I just feel weird about doing it. Kind of AWish, but I don't mind when people do, I like seeing them. haha. I actually locked my FB wall and restricted tagging so no one can mention it until I am ready. We are telling people in person now and I don't want that to be ruined.I have like 800 FB friends. I need to cut it down, seriously.

monaclemere · February 2013

It's just NMS. I don't enjoy the amount of attention something like that brings. I'm just not a big "announcer" in general. If people ask me if I'm pregnant, I'm far enough along that I'm willing to admit it. However, I don't go around blurting out the news. (except to my parents and siblings)

Laurakat81 · February 2013

I'm not. After 3 years of losses and fertility treatments I've been on the other side of this and I know how hard it is to see people announcing left and right on FB, being completely blindsided, and reminded that it might not ever happen for me. Or heartbroken over how I should have been announcing my last pregnancy, or celebrating a first, or second, or even third birthday. It's tough and through the process I've gained a ton of friends going through the same thing, some have already had kids, some never will, and everything in between, and I refuse to play a part in adding a little extra heartache to their day, when they already go through so much.

Those I'm closest to know I'm pregnant so I see no need to throw it in anyone's face which is what it feels like on FB, you can't escape it. And when loss and IF are so hush-hush you really just never know what someone else is dealing with.

Me&MrBee · February 2013

I'm not really into the attention part of it. One of my friends posted every little thing from how she couldn't stand the people on the bus effecting her "pregnant nose" to how swollen her feet have been. I felt like some of it was uneccesary, however isnt half the crap posted on there uneccesary anyhow? SO I guess whatever, I just dont think its for me. The important people know already and the rest im sure will figure it out.

Kay522 · February 2013

We have decided not to announce it on FB. It just isn't my thing. I don't really like attention. I won't really care if I get outed on FB, but I won't be the one to announce it.

Kay522 · February 2013

I have a friend like this too! She posted a picture of her bump every week! She would also start every status she posted with, "This preggo...." It was very annoying. I eventually had to block her.

SwittyMcGee · February 2013

I'm not announcing on FB. I just don't want to announce that way.

I actually shut down my account last week; my extended family already knows about the pregnancy, and I don't want anyone outing me, intentionally or accidentally. I haven't decided if I will reactivate my account after the baby is born.

Kay522 · February 2013

Kay522:
I have a friend like this too! She posted a picture of her bump every week! She would also start every status she posted with, "This preggo...." It was very annoying. I eventually had to block her.

Sorry I meant to quote Me&MrBee.

EmeraldSea · February 2013

I'm not "announcing" in any over the top way. DH likes the idea of doing something clever but really, anyone who needs to know will find out from us.

I don't like when people post photos of U/S on Fbk (and even worse... the pregnancy test!), as it is just too personal for me. We don't plan to post a million pictures of our baby when he/she is born either. So really, we may do a facebook status or just wait until I'm tagged in a photo with a bump.

Facebook gets on my nerves but bc I live so far from family and friends, it really is an ideal way to stay connected.

kahlan82 · February 2013

I did. I am only "friends" with close friends and family. DH and I's immediate and extended family live 10-24 hours away from us, and many of our close friends don't live in our state (lots of moving in our families). I want to be able to keep them all in the loop with info. and pictures, so I am using facebook to do this. I wish our families lived closer but we make do.

Ladydianna · February 2013

iriscarmendiaz:
brockerln:
We're not announcing on FB. DH likes to keep our lives pretty private. I also have 400+ friends on FB, many of whom I do not speak to on a regular basis and I do not feel the need to share this with them. However, we've pretty much told all of our family and friends at this point. I may need to private message a few friends on FB who live out of state or out of the country of the good news.
I figure that the rest will find out when we have the newborn pics up.
Same here. I've got nearly 300 "friends" on Facebook. Many of them are people who I have either friended them years ago and forgot about or I am mildly curious to see how they are doing. I did most of my announcing by phone (a couple by IM) since I live 3,000 miles away from everyone I know. I specifically asked everyone (except 1 person I forgot) to keep it OFF Facebook. She *my cousin) went ahead and posted it and tagged me in it. I asked her to please untag me and she threw a fit and hasn't spoken to me since. If I'm not posting my own news on Facebook, what makes her think she has the right to do so?
You can un tag yourself from her post. And I would change your settings to require permission to tag you or post something to your page.

MrsSteSte · February 2013

We're not doing a big announcement. But now that we've started telling friends and my mom has the ok to talk about it, I know it's a matter of time before it creeps onto my wall. I'm not really concerned, if it happens it happens.

Sascha3 · February 2013

I did. I don't think of having a baby as private...I am happy for the world to know. I have a very extended network of friends that are from my home state, or have moved away from where I live now, or were old coworkers or other friends that I was very close to at some point in my life. I even have several people I was "online" friends with during my wedding planning from The Knot that I have stayed in contact with for 4 years. True, I may not be best friends with them, but I still like to share my news.

I really, really hate talking on the phone, nor do I have time to call every single person that is not a part of my daily life, but that doesn't stop me from wanting them to know. I am not an oversharer...I don't go on there and give gritty details about pregnancy or parenting. I don't go on there to complain. I keep all my posts light and funny.

BlueJewelM · February 2013

kateisgreat:
I won't be making a FB announcement. I'm not going to hide it if anyone makes a comment or posts a picture that shows me with a bump, but anyone who needs to know that I'm pg will be told directly by either me or DH. FB can find out when I post photos of the baby.nbsp;

All this. I haven't made a status update since October. I'm just not the type to post on fb much. I will post a pic of baby when they come or if I get tagged with a bump noticeable so be it, but I'm not one to be like, look at meeeeeeeee!, I'm pregnant!

I prefer to keep photos of DS off fb by only sharing a photo once every 4 months or so. Will do the same with this baby. I do not consider fb a REAL form of communication. I have online albums family and close friends can access if they want to see DS more.

With DS I did announce after the anatomy scan and felt a little weird after. So decided against it this time. Some people post their lunch everyday and every detail though. NMS.

fritz799 · February 2013

My best friend didn't. Her wedding pics were all over FB: So, at first, I thought she was paranoid about the pregnancy (we're both over 35). But then she didn't announce the baby's birth either. The baby is now four months old, and she hasn't posted anything about him.

She's lived all over the country and has friends scattered everywhere--so she said that it felt a little lonely when no one recognized the baby's birth on her page. Obviously, her closest friends knew--but the people she went to high school/college/law school with didn't. Some of her family didn't even know. And those who did (myself included) were reluctant to post out of respect for the behavior she'd already demonstrated.

fritz799 · February 2013

This. Entirely this:

Sascha3:
I did. I don't think of having a baby as private...I am happy for the world to know. I have a very extended network of friends that are from my home state, or have moved away from where I live now, or were old coworkers or other friends that I was very close to at some point in my life. I even have several people I was "online" friends with during my wedding planning from The Knot that I have stayed in contact with for 4 years. True, I may not be best friends with them, but I still like to share my news.
I really, really hate talking on the phone, nor do I have time to call every single person that is not a part of my daily life, but that doesn't stop me from wanting them to know. I am not an oversharer...I don't go on there and give gritty details about pregnancy or parenting. I don't go on there to complain. I keep all my posts light and funny.

BlueJewelM · February 2013

fritz799:
But then she didn't announce the baby's birth either. nbsp;The baby is now four months old, and she hasn't posted anything about him.nbsp;She's lived all over the country and has friends scattered everywhereso she said that it felt a little lonely when no one recognized the baby's birth on her page. Obviously, her closest friends knewbut the people she went to high school/college/law school with didn't. nbsp;Some of her family didn't even know. nbsp;And those who did myself included were reluctant to post out of respect for the behavior she'd already demonstrated.nbsp;

Well...that sounds a little dense.

Why would someone not put up any baby info on fb yet expect people to acknowledge the baby later On that particular platform? You get what you give on fb. You post stuff, you get lots of comments and likes, if you don't, less comments and likes.

I haven't posted anything about my pg on fb...and don't expect anyone to post anything on my page about it. I guess that's just common sense to me. If I wanted lots of fb chatter about it...I'd start it.

That is sad that a person could be lonely because of a neglected Facebook page though...sign of the times I guess? Kind of scary what our world is coming to.

EJPint · February 2013

I don't really plan to. Everyone I care about knows now, I'm not keeping it a secret from anyone else, I just don't see the need to make an announcement.

Maaaaybe I'll say something in a small status update when we learn the gender, but otherwise I'm not going to make a production about it. I don't update all that often, anyway.

amandarins · February 2013

No Facebook for me, just Instagram. Facebook has seemed to become a group of strangers and I don't really use it anymore.

BlueJewelM · February 2013

jessicaivana:
I find it annoying when people are constantly posting about their pregnancy and or children...that's why you have places like The Bump!

Me too! I couldn't imagine posting about DS everyday, multiple times a day. When my friends do it, it drives me bonkers. Plus I notice the fewer posts I make, the more of an impact my one post gets. Haha.

jenncamp · February 2013

I am almost 19 weeks along. We told family first, and we are just finished telling friends we see on a regular basis along with coworkers. We have been slow to tell people as I had a miscarriage over a year ago and we have gone through fertility treatments and genetic screenings. Now though as we find out the gender this week I will post that we are expecting along with the gender on facebook as I have family and friends who live in other states and countries and we use facebook to keep in touch. However, I am definitely going to wait until after we tell our parents, siblings and few close friends the gender. I think they should find out from us not from someone who saw it on facebook. Plus if any pictures of me being pregnant get posted on facebook, I would rather have people find out from my post not by someone else's post. However, this will be my one and only post about my pregnancy, and I will not be posting any pictures of the baby once he/she is born and will ask the same of friends and family. I think that it is just strange that when my child is 20 years old or so and has their own facebook account that their baby pictures will be on Facebook. I know I certainly don't want my baby pictures posted.

I have been using a website called www.momentgarden.com though since we shared my pregnancy with our parents and siblings (there is also an app for the phone). I have an account and upload ultrasound photos, photos of me and share any other news on the website. It looks like a timeline. Then you can share with people of your own choice through using their email address. They don't have to create an account and every time you add something new they get an email inviting them to look at it. They can comment on things you post or "love" them. In the end you can order a book if you like. I think I will use it when the baby is born too. Family and friends you share it with can also add photos of their own. I really like the website and can't say enough good things about it.

tashatashio · February 2013

We only wanted our close family and friends to know. My husband and I moved to California from England in October and found out I was pregnant a few weeks later. We literally told our parents plus 2 friends back home around 10 weeks and it spread like wildfire, because everyone started posted on our walls "Congratulations!" etc... We were a annoyed at first because we were wanting to mail cute announcements out. Oh well! We will mail out announcements when the baby is born to our closest family and friends. Everyone else who stalks us on on facebook will have to wait for the occasional photo.

corrinmiranda · February 2013

After a long debate and thought, I decided that I will only because I have some far away friends. But we are waiting for my 20 week ultrasound with a gender. Then we are going to do a little cute photo with my son since this is my 2nd. I wanted to make a one time post about it, but make it nice.

LLBlack21 · February 2013

Sascha3:
I did. I don't think of having a baby as private...I am happy for the world to know. I have a very extended network of friends that are from my home state, or have moved away from where I live now, or were old coworkers or other friends that I was very close to at some point in my life. I even have several people I was "online" friends with during my wedding planning from The Knot that I have stayed in contact with for 4 years. True, I may not be best friends with them, but I still like to share my news.
I really, really hate talking on the phone, nor do I have time to call every single person that is not a part of my daily life, but that doesn't stop me from wanting them to know. I am not an oversharer...I don't go on there and give gritty details about pregnancy or parenting. I don't go on there to complain. I keep all my posts light and funny.

I'm with Sascha. The important people knew first as did the people I see on a daily basis, but I thought it was kind of fun to announce on FB once I was far enough along for the major risks of miscarriage to go down. I may not be best friends with everyone on FB, but enough are people that I'd like them know about it (a lot of them are long distance friends), but I fully agree with not posting about every little pregnancy detail or problem. I think it's fun to see other people share their news, and it's fun to share my own special and exciting pieces of news like a pregnancy or a wedding, but I don't go overboard and rub people's noses in it posting all the time about every little thing! There are plenty of things about it that I don't share.

LLBlack21 · February 2013

"My best friend didn't. Her wedding pics were all over FB: So, at first, I thought she was paranoid about the pregnancy (we're both over 35). But then she didn't announce the baby's birth either. The baby is now four months old, and she hasn't posted anything about him.

She's lived all over the country and has friends scattered everywhere--so she said that it felt a little lonely when no one recognized the baby's birth on her page. Obviously, her closest friends knew--but the people she went to high school/college/law school with didn't. Some of her family didn't even know. And those who did (myself included) were reluctant to post out of respect for the behavior she'd already demonstrated."

I can understand being worried about the pregnancy and waiting until birth to announce it, but not doing even that and then expecting people to know what's going on or to reach out and acknowledge it it kind of presumptuous. How would people know that she hadn't told? And people who she had told would of course follow her cue.

Want a personalized experience?

Not Announcing on Facebook

Re: Not Announcing on Facebook

Choose Another Board

Search Boards