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So frustrated

jenjen930jenjen930 member
in Blended Families

So I posted last week about SD's bad grades.  This weekend we discovered that she had 3 missed assignments in a matter of a few days (we see her grades online - but they sometimes update several assignments at a time).  So DH tried to contact BM to talk to her about this - literally all weekend.  He finally talked to SD Sunday afternoon, but BM never bothered calling him back.  She texted him towards the end of the night thanking him for bringing his concerns to her attention and telling him to email her with further concerns and she will get back to him as promptly as possible. 

First of all, she never, ever responds when we email her.  We have been trying to get her to email for a long time (cuts down on arguing - and provides a written record) but she just hasn't cooperated.  I honestly think she was being a smart aleck about it for that reason in fact.  But the problem is she didn't answer the specific question he asked her:  "What are we going to do about the missing assignments?".  Ugh.  She just doesn't care.  It's so frustrating.

No real point to this post I guess.  Just venting.

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Re: So frustrated

  • socloudy99socloudy99 member

    Since your SD is school age your DH may need to start addressing this directly with his DD. BM not seeming interested doesn't make SDs grades any better. Your DH discussing with her that he is checking the grades often, is disappointed that she is missing assingments, and what he expects school wise may go a lot further. He can ask her what she is missing and her plan to get it corrected then check up with her at that time. Sometimes kids do better just because they know someone is looking.

    If she is asking for email try it again. As frustrating as it is sometimes you have to try something 20 times in a blended family before it works. Sometimes it is just control so if the email is "BMs idea" she may do it this time.

    GL!

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  • jenjen930jenjen930 member
    imagesocloudy99:

    Since your SD is school age your DH may need to start addressing this directly with his DD. BM not seeming interested doesn't make SDs grades any better. Your DH discussing with her that he is checking the grades often, is disappointed that she is missing assingments, and what he expects school wise may go a lot further. He can ask her what she is missing and her plan to get it corrected then check up with her at that time. Sometimes kids do better just because they know someone is looking.

    If she is asking for email try it again. As frustrating as it is sometimes you have to try something 20 times in a blended family before it works. Sometimes it is just control so if the email is "BMs idea" she may do it this time.

    GL!

    He has discussed it directly with SD.  That is what I meant when I said he finally talked to her Sunday afternoon.  It just would be nice to have some consistent consequences/rewards at both houses.  We cannot do this on our own when we only see her twice a month.  She blows off our consequences because they only last a few days at a time then she's back to Mom's house and everything is fine again.

    We did email her again.  No response.

    I guess I just needed to vent.  Thanks for trying to help, though.

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