Pumping makes SO sick

amparker1984 · February 2013

My SO is super supportive of breast feeding. We both hope to be very successful.

I am being induced tomorrow night and I am trying all if the natural ways to coax our little guy out on his own.

Yesterday I hooked up to the pump to start the natural hormones flowing. SO was sitting beside me and when we started producing it made him gag. He had to leave the room. We laughed at first. It was so unexpected for the both of us. I threw a blanket over me and continued. After a few minutes I asked if he wanted to see again. Hoping he was a little more prepared. He was game like I said he really wants this for our DS as well so I removed the cover and he had to run to the restroom where he got sick. Again we laughed it off and talked about how it's something he will have to get over.

Right now I plan to take baby steps and overtime he won't be so sensitive to it. But now it's got me thinking... What if he can't handle the site of me BF our son. I will have to use a cover all the time even at home. Or he or I would have to leave the room. Neither of us wants that. This is OUR home. Not to mention it might make me feel alone and the stress might make it harder to BF.

I'm really scared now and could use some advice. Has this happened to you? What did you do?

almostjennifer · February 2013

It never made him sick, but he never sat and watched me either.

SunshineMuffin · February 2013

I'm not sure why you pumping is a spectator sport. Why does he have to watch?

lc&jw · February 2013

Sorry he had such a strong reaction. Things may be a little different once LO is on the breast nursing and your SO can't actually see what's coming out vs. right now with the pump. Did pumping lead to any contractions?

amparker1984 · February 2013

SunshineMuffin:
I'm not sure why you pumping is a spectator sport. Why does he have to watch?

He doesn't HAVE to watch its not a spectator sport your comment was rude and uncalled for. I asked for advice. If you don't gave anything then move along.

amparker1984 · February 2013

SunshineMuffin:
I'm not sure why you pumping is a spectator sport. Why does he have to watch?

He doesn't HAVE to watch its not a spectator sport your comment was rude and uncalled for. I asked for advice. If you don't gave anything then move along.

amparker1984 · February 2013

lcjw:
Did pumping lead to any contractions?

A little. Did not get to do it very long. People showed up unexpectedly. Will try again later today. Ill let u know of any contrax. Ur supposed to do it for about 3 hours with breaks.

wifeofadam · February 2013

DH thinks it looks uncomfortable and gross. He just ignores me if I'm doing it. Honestly, I just think it's something they get used to, but I don't think they ever will want to watch you do it. I mean, I've pumped for years of my life, but it still looks horribly uncomfortable and strange when I watch another woman do it.

ilysarahd · February 2013

I don't have experience since I'm a FTM but this it what I think!

Don't be scared! The more stressed you are the harder it can be to BF. You know your doing what's best for your LO and he knows it too! It's good that you guys can joke about it, It's going to take time for him to get used to the idea of BF. I also get what your saying about not wanting/needing to cover up at home(seems silly to have to do so). They say men can't really grasp any of it until the baby has arrived, that's when they make the connection to their child. I think it's going to take your LO being born for him to be able to handle you BF.

ally2011 · February 2013

I think it is great that you are so committed to BFing and wish you the best.

That said, why is pumping something your SO needs to witness? I don't ever intend to pump in front of my DH. I think BFing is a little different as it looks different and has a bonding component to it. However, I would not care if DH never saw that either.

This may be unpopular, but I think sometimes ladies (I am not saying this is you) want their spouses and SOs to be involved in every little thing which in my opinion is not necessary and is sometimes hurtful to the romance side of a relationship. I still want my husband to see me as his sexual wife when it is all said and done with and I am not sure watching me pump would contribute to that. That is just my 2 cents and I am sure there are families for whom that works fine. I personally think a little mystery and bodily function privacy is fine and welcomed I strongly believe the best home for a baby is one in which the parents still put their relationship first, are in love, and the baby/child knows it....that may look different for different families, but the core principle is the same....though I realize this is a little off topic for this thread

wifeofadam · February 2013

Maybe instead of pumping you could involve him in the nipple stimulation. It could be fun for him and just as effective.

kelly321 · February 2013

+adamwife+:
Maybe instead of pumping you could involve him in the nipple stimulation. It could be fun for him and just as effective.

Yes

I'm pretty sure that's the only reason pumping is supposed to help bring on contractions, anyway. Might as well do it in a way that's more enjoyable for him if it's all the same to you :-)

Runaway22 · February 2013

kelly321:
+adamwife+:
Maybe instead of pumping you could involve him in the nipple stimulation. It could be fun for him and just as effective.
I'm pretty sure that's the only reason pumping is supposed to help bring on contractions, anyway. Might as well do it in a way that's more enjoyable for him if it's all the same to you :-)

All of this.

Also, OP, I really doubt your honey will be disturbed by the sight of your baby at your breast. That looks sooo much more natural than pumping (because, well, it is, lol). Don't let his freaked-outness over seeing you pump discourage you - it's wayyy too early for discouragement in that realm Also, like PP said, stressing now will only make it that much more difficult to BF when your LO is here.

Just relax, and don't pump *in front* of your SO (DH? Sorry, can't remember) for now. I am sure you will adjust nicely in time to this whole parenting/boobs are for food thing

ggatlanta · February 2013

ally2011:
This may be unpopular, but I think sometimes ladies (I am not saying this is you) want their spouses and SOs to be involved in every little thing which in my opinion is not necessary and is sometimes hurtful to the romance side of a relationship. I still want my husband to see me as his sexual wife when it is all said and done with and I am not sure watching me pump would contribute to that.

All of this. It doesn't mean he is less committed to BFing your LO if he is grossed out by things that look kinda gross.

Even the staunchest BFing advocates are likely to agree that watching a woman pump is a close second to watching her tweeze an ingrown hair.

I'd wait to worry that he'll be bothered by breastfeeding. You've got enough on your plate now without borrowing trouble! Good luck with your induction / contractions. (And if pumping works, please share your secret with those of us who fear a late baby!)

beanersmommy · February 2013

Just curious-- how many weeks are you? I wouldn't try to induce labor unless I was 40weeks.

amparker1984 · February 2013

Just to be clear I am certainly not making him watch. I just want to be able to sit in our living room together and watch a movie, relax and take care of business.

Just because I would prefer not to cover doesn't mean I won't.

My concern is how he will deal with BFing. Hopefully as u all have suggested it will be different when our son is here. But if there is a problem I am trying to find ways to get in front of it.

And we certainly can chaulk my snap to one of the ladies up to hormones. I also walked out of a prenatal massage before we got started today. Ugh.

I am 40 w tomorrow and have a scheduled induction medical so jus trying to get him out on his own. Ill be sure to update if it works.

Thanks ladies for your advice

Heartstrings13 · February 2013

I agree with those who said not to worry until you start breastfeeding. It is a totally different animal. The entire mood and look of it different. He may have a strong response to pumping because it is so clinical. To see you breastfeed may not be an issue at all. By worrying now, you are potentially causing yourself undue stress. There really isn't anything you can do now to desenstize him unless you try having him read articles / watch shows that talk about and show breastfeeding mothers.

pitterpatter129 · February 2013

I giggled at this. Men are so funny. My DH watched me pump for two years. If your SO doesn't like it, he can leave the room. Breastfeeding the actual baby and pumping are two entirely different things too, so I wouldn't worry about that. For the people who are planning on hiding away to pump, good luck with that. I sat shirtless, with a baby on a boppy next to me, watching TV and crying (bawling) while trying to pump enough to supplement for a few months at first. I was so worried about properly feeding the kid, I couldn't have given a damn what anyone around me thought. After giving birth in front of DH, pumping will be nothing. My DH always said the sound of the pump, that womp, womp sound, made him feel sick to his stomach though. That might have something to do with it. Just wait until you spray him with milk during sexy time...

ally2011 · February 2013

amparker1984:
Just to be clear I am certainly not making him watch. I just want to be able to sit in our living room together and watch a movie, relax and take care of business. Just because I would prefer not to cover doesn't mean I won't. My concern is how he will deal with BFing. Hopefully as u all have suggested it will be different when our son is here. But if there is a problem I am trying to find ways to get in front of it. And we certainly can chaulk my snap to one of the ladies up to hormones. I also walked out of a prenatal massage before we got started today. Ugh. I am 40 w tomorrow and have a scheduled induction medical so jus trying to get him out on his own. Ill be sure to update if it works. Thanks ladies for your advice

You can sit in your living room, watch a movie and relax before or after pumping....it is not necessary for that to be a group activity And as others have said, BFing is different than pumping so I would not worry that his reaction to one would be the same as for the other. As I already said, my DH will never see me pump. And if BFing bugged him, I would just use a cover at home, I would not care.

You will figure out something that works for you all, don't stress....things like this tend to work themselves out. Good luck!

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