April 2012 Moms

When you go out...

When DH and I go out together for a night, I'm generally the one to get up with DS first thing in the morning, since I still BF him.  However, it would be nice if DH got up and let me sleep in after I BFed.  We were out last night, and I got up this morning with DS.  DH gets up to go to the bathroom, comes out in the living room and says "Well I'd like to go back to sleep for a bit.'  Well, no sh*t, I would too, but one of us has to be up with DS.  DH was gone all day yesterday skiing, so I kinda feel like he should be the one up with DS right now, instead of me!

My question is, when only 1 of you goes out for either a guys or girls night, who takes the early shift the next morning?  Is it the one who got to go out, or is it the one who stayed in with LO? 

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Re: When you go out...

  • I take the early shift (usually around 6a) every day of the weekend.  We usually decide before who's getting up for what shift during the night(he usually also wakes up at 12a and around 3a), so we split that.  On weekdays, I have to leave for work at 530a, and he doesn't leave until 8a, so he always gets Blake ready for the day.  I feel like I don't get enough time with Blake during the week, so I don't really mind too much.  It would be nice to sleep in every once in a while, but usually I'll try to catch an hour while he naps.  Hubby will sometimes sleep til 10 or 11a if I let him on Sundays, so it doesn't really equal out, but oh well. 
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  • Well I can't remover the last time one if us was away without the other, but we have a system for each day of the week so regardless of plans it is split who sleeps in. For example, I nurse on Saturday morning and go right back to bed...my spouse is on charge all morning. Since I have an early morning job ifs my one sleep in morning. For us it creates less conflict to follow a schedule rather than basing it on circumstance
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  • We never go out with each other or alone really. He'll sometimes hang out with some friends after work on a Friday night (he closes, so he's home late anyway), but he also works the next morning. We both offer to help out in the morning on weekends. He knows that if he was out with his friends, leaving me to watch Micah all night, that I'll be exhausted, so he'll make more of an effort to help out. It really all came from us just asking for help every now and then.
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  • DH and I don't really go out much, but we take turns with DS. Because on Mondays and Tuesdays, I take DS the whole night, on Sunday and Saturdays DH will get up with the kids in the mornings and let me sleep in a bit.

    For us, I think it would be whoever was on baby duty would be the one who got to rest later.

    Have you talked to your H about it?

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  • I think whoever goes out gets to sleep in. As long as the going out is equal.
    Married 07/2011 <3
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  • I  almost always get up early!  My DH goes to work at  2am, so I pull the night shift and get DD up and ready every morning.  If (which has been alot lately) DD is up during the night he will stay up with her on friday and saturday nights, and every other Tuesday night.  It is not fair, but life is not fair.
  • imagemkwt:
    I  almost always get up early!  My DH goes to work at  2am, so I pull the night shift and get DD up and ready every morning.  If (which has been alot lately) DD is up during the night he will stay up with her on friday and saturday nights, and every other Tuesday night.  It is not fair, but life is not fair.

    I guess the answer to your question.....I always get up early (I get up early anyway). 

  • Well, since this Friday will be my first girls night out since DS was born, I guess we'll see! :) Well, actually, I'll be going out after we put DS to bed, and he usually STTN. (Although lately, teething has been rough, and he's been waking once or twice, but can usually get him back to sleep within 30 minutes). DH works Saturdays and Sundays and gets up 515 am, so he'll just be going to sleep like usual (although with the monitor on his side of the bed) until I get home later, then I'm back "on duty".

    I pull every night shift/early am shift, since I'm lucky enough stay at home with DS. (Granted, we didn't have much choice, as childcare actually would've broken even with my previous full-time salary, and added gas money to and from childcare would've actually made it more expensive for me to keep working! But I also wanted to stay at home. So even though we took a big income hit, and we're not doing too well financially, I still love being home with DS and am so grateful that I am.)

    So anyway, I feel like DS is my job. Therefore, since DH has to get up for early shift work and work the weekends, I cover all nights/early days. Occasionally, if it's been a really rough day and DS won't take an afternoon nap [something he's been refusing to do lately], DH will offer to "take over" when he comes home so I can grab an hour nap. Then we both play/fix dinner/etc with DS and DH gives DS a bath while I pickup toys/straighten DS's room, then DH says goodnight to DS, and while DH washes the dishes (we don't have a dishwasher!), I read to DS and rock him/put him to bed. 

    On DH's days off during the week (when he's not working overtime or in school), I'll offer to let him sleep in, but he's not a big late sleeper; he likes afternoon naps better. Sometimes, if we're lucky, DS will take a nice afternoon nap, and then DH and I hop into bed together for a joint nap! :) 

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