For those who aren't loving pregnancy.

pgermain11 · February 2013

Since I saw on the UO yesterday that there were people who I could relate to about being less than thrilled with the experience of pregnancy, I thought I'd ask for some perspective.

I was seriously disillusioned with pregnancy. I think it was partly due to the fact that when I saw other pregnant women, I would think about how they have this "special pass" in this time of their lives. A pass to be pampered, to be taken care of, for others to swoon over them and want to make them as comfortable as possible, whatever.. Maybe it was unrealistic expectations and it really is indeed "You're a big girl and can take care of yourself" kind of thing, but man am I having a reality check. As my gf said to me, "You should be frustrated that people won't let you do anything". (Note: That was her pregnancy).

I think the excitement of it all lasted for about 4-6 weeks after finding out I was pregnant. It was extremely fleeting. I might be feeling this way because I'm completely alone this weekend - DH is OOT with his father, my mother is with my sister in Cali, and my MIL (the only person I had left to lean on here) decided to leave to ATL. So it's just me.

Anyone else can relate to feeling like pregnancy isn't really turning out to be such a glorious thing any more? Besides the physical and emotional discomforts, how else do you deal with all the ups and downs? Anyone else went in thinking it was roses and butterflies?

TIA.

pepomntpat · February 2013

Well, I did like being PG with my first-other than the heartburn. I do feel like DH doted on me more. He came to every appointment, rubbed my back all the time. Not this time. Any excess energy he has goes to DD, which is good in a way, but I do miss the attention.

Now I even forget I am PG sometimes and then I get exhausted too easily or get a shot of RLP and it seems the only reminders I have that I am pregnant are painful ones. No one asks how I am doing or helps me at all. The only question DH asks about my pregnancy is if I've had anymore spotting. I want to punch him. DH is always OOT and it's just normal life caring for a toddler, except I'm tired and emotional. It is not at all fun.

I think it will get better when I can feel LO kick more and have a sweeter reminder that there is a baby in there. I did feel some significant movement during music class with DD this week and that really did bring a major smile to my face. And once the baby is here, well that really is all that matters.

If you really do need help with something, though, ask. You are allowed. I just told DH to carry the laundry basket upstairs. Maybe I"ll get a bonus and he'll fold the laundry, but I doubt it.

pgermain11 · February 2013

pepomntpat:
Well, I did like being PG with my first-other than the heartburn. I do feel like DH doted on me more. He came to every appointment, rubbed my back all the time. Not this time. Any excess energy he has goes to DD, which is good in a way, but I do miss the attention.
Now I even forget I am PG sometimes and then I get exhausted too easily or get a shot of RLP and it seems the only reminders I have that I am pregnant are painful ones. No one asks how I am doing or helps me at all. The only question DH asks about my pregnancy is if I've had anymore spotting. I want to punch him. DH is always OOT and it's just normal life caring for a toddler, except I'm tired and emotional. It is not at all fun.
I think it will get better when I can feel LO kick more and have a sweeter reminder that there is a baby in there. I did feel some significant movement during music class with DD this week and that really did bring a major smile to my face. And once the baby is here, well that really is all that matters.
If you really do need help with something, though, ask. You are allowed. I just told DH to carry the laundry basket upstairs. Maybe I"ll get a bonus and he'll fold the laundry, but I doubt it.

My DH acts like your DH now and this is our first. I can't even imagine a second. I forget often that I'm pregnant too bc it's not this glowy, fantastical, holy experience I kept reading about.

I also feel really guilty for feeling this way.

I do ask for help when I really need it. Usually he obliges, but most of the time, I just feel like a nag or a pest.

l5e3a2h4 · February 2013

When I found out I was pregnant I made a promise to myself to enjoy every minute because we fully intend on being one and done. That was before I had to get up from the dinner table to throw up, lose my breath putting on my shoes, get rubbed on my belly by random people and getting 100 different opinions on what I should be doing differently. Dont get me wrong, I still appreciate being pregnant and I will be very thankful when it's all said and done but right this minute I'm tired of it. I guess the trick is to keep reminding ourselves it will all be worth it. Just remember, you're not alone haha! Hang in there!

pepomntpat · February 2013

pgermain11:

My DH acts like your DH now and this is our first. I can't even imagine a second. I forget often that I'm pregnant too bc it's not this glowy, fantastical, holy experience I kept reading about.
I also feel really guilty for feeling this way.
I do ask for help when I really need it. Usually he obliges, but most of the time, I just feel like a nag or a pest.

LOL! Your DH is normal. Mine is the abnormal one. Everyone always said how wonderful he was and how attentive and what a great husband and dad. Which is all true, but I just figured that's how it's supposed to be. Apparently it is abnormal. Once you have a big belly and your DH can feel the baby kick I am sure he'll find it more interesting. Pregnancy is very abstract at this stage.

jennipalmer · February 2013

This is my DH's first baby but feels since I have been through it before I should be a champ at it. Remind you my baby is almost 10 years old so I have forgotten few things not to mention I am 10 years older and freaking tired. He does get me ice cream and ask me how I am doing because he is away lots too. This time about 3-4 months!! But he is the type if I asked him to rub back or feet he would give me spa money LOL

aehamilton13 · February 2013

I'm in the same boat too. I thought I'd be one of those women who really enjoys being pregnant, but so far.. Not so much. Like others have said, I'm so thankful I am, and I know in the end it will be worth it, but right now I'm just sick and uncomfortable and tired. Maybe once we're feeling better and can feel the baby move, it will help!

pgermain11 · February 2013

You know I don't expect any man to understand anything of what's going on, but I do expect compassion at least. It's not just him though. It's just everything...

I'm looking forward to the baby and not the remainder of this pregnancy. I'm not sure how to deal with it really.

sparkymcgeee · February 2013

You all know this is not my favorite thing to do. Pregnancy is hard. Acknowledging that doesn't make us less appreciative or bad moms. It just makes us honest. There are moments I love. The kicks are incredible. The heartbeat and ultrasounds are amazing. Of course having a beautiful baby at the end of it makes it worth it. So it's not ALL bad. This is a hard point. You've been pregnant for a few months. Your over the initial excitement and everything but you can't feel baby much yet so it's still a bit abstract. It gets better before it gets hard again.
And just as confirmation sprout just gave me a good kick. I do love that.

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