Well, the time has come...

atcwag · January 2013

Hello ladies! I've been lurking this board for a while because I am committed to a drug-free childbirth as long as it continues to be a safe situation for baby and myself.

I just found out on Wednesday that I am expecting #1. I'm very excited, but nervous and a little scared all at the same time. I know it's very early, but I am hoping for a healthy 9 months.

I am going in with a "medication is not an option" mindset from the very beginning. I'm not even going to entertain the idea. I'm also commited to breastfeeding.

A close family member is the nurse in one of the local OB/GYN offices and she gave me the lowdown on the "natural birth friendly" options in my area. I am planning a hospital birth with an OB/GYN and will not be employing the services of a doula. I am committed to advocating for myself and also making sure my DH is a supportive partner. A close friend is also a L&D nurse in the hospital where I am delivering, so I am hoping she will also be my advocate and give me tips on how to "work together" with the hospital to achieve my goals.

I'm looking for any and all advice you all have and also book recommendations. In lurking, I know I should read up on Ina May...Childbirth/Breasfeeding. Anything else that is a "must read"?

vintagejjane · January 2013

That's great that you are so confident in your choice! I would suggest to make sure that you have someone in your corner who knows what you want and can be an advocate for you. When the time comes during labor, sometimes it's hard to be convinced to do something you normally wouldn't want done. It's nice to have someone there who knows exactly what you want and helps make sure things go the way you want them to (unless it's an emergency of course) Good luck and it sounds like you're off to a good start!

aintmeamanatee · January 2013

Welcome, and congratulations! I recommend that you learn anything and everything you can for the next 9 months. I read Natural Childbirth the Bradley Way, even though we went with Hypnobirthing, this book was very helpful. I liked the Hypnobirthing book, but the classes were amazing!

Stay away from shows like "A Baby Story" that in my opinion, do nothing but breed fear (99% of them are so over dramatic!). If anyone starts to tell you a pregnancy horror story, tell them, "Shhh, my baby is listening" with a serious face. You get some fun reactions and people stop filling your head with stories.

Join prenatal yoga or another community where you can socialize with pregnant women. Us pregnant ladies can sit around and share pregnancy stories all day, but people that aren't pregnant might now be as willing to listen to constant baby banter. Its great to have a couple of women to compare symptoms and bounce ideas off of.

mb314 · January 2013

Congrats! While childbirth classes are not a prerequisite for a natural birth, I found our Bradley classes to be really helpful. They really explained how to be informed on the major issues and interventions and how to advocate for yourself.

PansyPants · January 2013

Congratulations on your pregnancy!

My advice is to relax a little. You're 4 weeks pregnant and at the very beginning of this new adventure. Be careful that you don't become so committed to a choice that you don't reach the goal of a med-free birth.

I agree with PP that you may want someone in your corner to advocate for you during labor; I feel that someone shouldn't be the husband. Husbands have a lot on their minds and don't need to add bouncer/advocate to the list of things they need to do. That's doubly true if you're relying on him to be your main support. He should be informed and he likely will speak up, but having support for him will free his energy to focus on encouraging you.

We had a doula last time and I honestly didn't plan on calling her. I wanted it private and just dh and I. But the time came when he wasn't enough and I'm glad she was available for us. You may not need a doula but I strongly suggest having somebody who can come at a moments notice and help with being your voice and renewing the strength that wanes after hours of hard work.

Again, my advice is to relax a little and don't rule things out so early. You may do exactly what your opening post described but having such rigid goals can cause you to be inflexible to positive changes.

Oh, and read Birthing from Within. Its not a guide or method so much as an idea and suggestions of what has worked for others. I also did Bradley classes and the book last time, they were very helpful for the first time around.

pinksweetpea2 · January 2013

Congrats on your pregnancy and good luck with everything.

iris427 · January 2013

Welcome!

I think you need to be careful of completely writing off any option. Sometimes even with our best intentions and preparations, things go awry, and I would hate to see someone feel like it was a personal failing if they did end up with an epidural (or whatever other medical intervention they had sworn off). It's great to have a goal but I think being able to advocate for yourself even if things aren't going according to plan is the most important thing.

GL

Celyn · January 2013

Congrats! The Birth Partner is a favorite book of mine. Educate yourself on methods of relaxation. Some people can grit and bear it by sheer determination, which it sounds like you have, but there are many ways to make laboring more comfortable. Penny talks about many of them in that book.

aylafsu88 · January 2013

Welcome and congrats. I loved the Bradley classes and my H enjoyed them too. They really trained him how to be a supportive coach and educated him on childbirth. I thought they were well worth the money. I also loved the book "A thinking womens guide to a better birth by Henci Goer. It had a lot of information on standard hospital interventions, why they are done and how to avoid them.

starbuck12 · January 2013

Congrats momma! Your resolutions about natural birth are strong, and that's fantastic. I'm the same way, I know exactly what I want and I've spent the last 9 months researching and making sure that my husband is not only informed of what we want for the birth of our first child, but that he knows how to be the most supportive birth partner to me as he can. The one thing I would say is that you should write all your resolutions in a birth plan for all those who will be involved in the birth of your baby, it seems to help make things more solid. Also, while you don't want to plan on things that you don't want to happen (C-sections, induced labor, etc.) it is a good idea to do as much research into those things as you can, just as much, if not more than the research you do into things you want. By all means, stick to your guns, momma, and plan for the best. But, if things don't go according to plan (and they might not because birth isn't perfect Sad

) then it's best to know what all the options are for plans B, C, and D. That way, if you have to make decisions that weren't a part of your plan, you're making informed decisions that you've researched and aren't having to make when you're in labor! Good luck to you on your new journey!!!

Bonnesetter27 · January 2013

Congrats! I am a lurker here but I wanted to say that it is great to know what you want but sometimes things are out of your control. I had the mindset that I was going to breastfeed no matter what but my lo was dehydrated and I had no milk so I had to supplement. I cried for weeks about not being able to EBF, even though I was still pumping and giving formula. I just want you to be flexible and know that you will make the best choices for your baby, this way you won't be disappointed if something is out of your control.

Lina1030 · January 2013

You have a strong head on your shoulders!! Keep that attitude and trust your baby and body

Look into Hypnobirthing....it was amazing for us. I know you don't want a doula....but maybe something you want to reconsider....I am sure your husband will be an amazing support, my husband did not understand why I wanted one, but after the fact he was very grateful to have her there...she supported both of us.

OldGlory · January 2013

Congratulations and Good Luck!

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