feeling miserable

GirlOn1stAnd10 · January 2013

Not regretting the adoption decision by any means but I feel like I've fallen into a serious state of depression the past few days. It was recommended that I see a counselor but at 175 for the first visit and 120 a visit after that, it's just not possible for me. What are my other options? Even our church wanys to charge me for counseling and I'm not sure what to do.

ycristina84 · January 2013

Have you asked the adoptive parents? If it was me, I would pay for my birthmom's counseling, specially since most agencies provide it. I'm surprised you APs haven't offered before...That said, there are city and state mental health services, for low income or people without insurance, where the co-pay can be as low as $15. You will usually have a lot of paperwork to get started, but it's worth it. I would just do a google search and see what free or low cost mental health clinic is in your area.

Ginny0211 · January 2013

Are you working with an agency? The agency we used offered free counseling and birthmother mentoring/support groups.

GirlOn1stAnd10 · January 2013

I want to avoid an agency at all cost. Our family has not had good experiences with them. Our AM is actually a school counselor, so I broke down and asked her about it, and she's sending me a list of counselors she reccomends. They already help us so much and I didn't want to ask for more but when I started crying over spaghetti I figured it was time to preserve my mental health. Luckily AM was willing to help me out :]

IRR · January 2013

Not sure what state you live in but AP's should be paying for your counseling whether you are using an agency or not. Seek the help you need and I am sure the AP's will find a way to pay for it.

sarahtoledo · January 2013

Just wanted to offer a virtual (((hug))). I have dealt with situational anxiety and depression and know that hormones can make it even worse. I'll be keeping you in my thoughts/prayers.

srmmm09 · January 2013

I'm a BM and I had counseling 6 mos prior to giving birth through 4 months post-partem. On top of some more adoption-specific counseling/training/head's up type stuff through our agency. It was so helpful for me to be able to process my grief in the stage I was in, to talk through it with someone who has no personal investment (so I could lay it all out there without fear that it will hurt anyone, or that anyone would think I had doubts just bc I was grieving).

I really think counseling was the second most helpful thing (the first being my new relationship with God; I became a Christian 2 weeks before I found out I was pg!). I really think it's why I have no pain seeing M, just happiness for him and his family.

GirlOn1stAnd10 · January 2013

sarahtoledo:
Just wanted to offer a virtual hug. nbsp;I have dealt with situational anxiety and depression and know that hormones can make it even worse. nbsp;I'll be keeping you in my thoughts/prayers.

Thank you so much :] I feel better after a good cry and some chocolate but I don't want to repress these feelings and then take them out on Harlow or FI or our AP. I want this to be as healthy as possible for everyone

mel1987 · January 2013

There are religious groups that provide free counseling for expectant mothers where I live. Hopefully there is something similar near you. I haven't even decided for sure the path I'm taking, but it's really nice talking to a third party about emotions and such. GL!!!

[Deleted User] · January 2013

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ellekae · January 2013

So sorry for how you are feeling! Ditto to what others have said.

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