Blended Families

Open letters

Dear BM2,

The girls are only at our house every other weekend if that. There is no reason you need to text them 50 times a day. When they don't answer it isn't anyone in the houses fault but the girls. They are ignoring you. When they are busy with their siblings they are not in a hurry to respond to your "hey" text.

Sincerly,

Hoping you find something to do

Dear H,

I love you. I know the new job stinks and you are having a hard time but keep applying and you will find the right fit. I am so in your corner.

Love always,

Wife

Add your own!

Re: Open letters

  • Dear BM,

    If you want cooperation from DH please stop name calling and telling him he is selfish.  You get more bees with honey, try to keep that in mind, m'kay?

    Dear SD1,

    What's with the attitude?  You are 8, not 16, please stop acting like an adult.  You are a child, have fun!

    Sincerely, 

    Me



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  • 8+9 are the worst ages, imo.  I thought it was just oldest SS, but middle one is going through it now.  It's like they just learn how to be mouthy or sarcastic, and they don't know how to filter it.
    Stay at home mom to a house of boys: two amazing stepsons, 12 and 9, and our 4 year old.
  • imageJ&A2008:
    8+9 are the worst ages, imo.  I thought it was just oldest SS, but middle one is going through it now.  It's like they just learn how to be mouthy or sarcastic, and they don't know how to filter it.

    Yup.

    Mama of 2: one who grew in my womb, both who grow in my heart.
  • Dear MIL,

    We will NOT be going on vacation with you guys this summer.  I have told you this, your son has told you this.  Do NOT continue to try and go around us to our 9 year old child.  She does not make the money that would pay for that kind of trip, and you using her to manipulate those of us who do is disgusting and says a lot about your character, lady.

    If you mess with my children I will make it so you never see them again.

    Sincerely,

    Daughter in law

    Mama of 2: one who grew in my womb, both who grow in my heart.
  • Dear BD,

    If you want a better relationship for our kids do not have your wife answer or send me emails or texts. You are their father!! If you don't have time make time they are your kids. If you are trying to make a relationship between her and I just stop she ruined our 16 year friendship when she married my ex husband. It is her bed let her lay in it.

    Sincerely,

    Me

    Dear DH,

    I miss you and even when you are not with me I know you are here for me always. I know I am spacey sometimes but I will get better at this housewife stuff remember it is new to me :) And I will find the damn tablet but I swear you must have packed it in your stuff and forgot.

    Love,

    Your Loving Wife

     

  • imageJ&A2008:
    8+9 are the worst ages, imo.  I thought it was just oldest SS, but middle one is going through it now.  It's like they just learn how to be mouthy or sarcastic, and they don't know how to filter it.

    Glad to know we aren't the only ones dealing with this.  It's like she's trying on some new things.  It's all come part and parcel with a newfound interest in clothing and what she's wearing, along with doing her own hair and trying different styles out.  Are we already entering tween-dom?



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  • Dear BD

    Please do not make promises to your children you have no intention of keeping.  Stop letting your wife take complete control of your life, she is not paying your child support not matter what she says.  It is your credit and possible jail time not hers.  I send you both texts about the situation and you never respond. I am not doing that anymore because it is not working....Man up grow a pair.

     

    Me

  • Dear BM,

    You really need to get your life together.  CS will not last forever. 

    It is not our, or anyone else's, responsiblity to handle your problems.  Stop imposing on other people to do everything for you just because you are a single mom.  There is not one single thing in your life that you did not make the way it is. 

    Learn to put your DD first, and set a good example.  She is learning terrible habits from you.

    Sincerely,
    Fed-Up

    Dear DH,

    What were you thinking?!?  Wink

    Love,
    Your Wife

    Warning No formatter is installed for the format bbhtml
  • imageFutureMrsWittig:

    imageJ&A2008:
    8+9 are the worst ages, imo.  I thought it was just oldest SS, but middle one is going through it now.  It's like they just learn how to be mouthy or sarcastic, and they don't know how to filter it.

    Yup.



    I don't know about you, but my hypothesis is that it has something to do w all those Disney Chanel and teen nick shows like victorious, shake it up, etc. All the kids on those shows have such attitude and that is where my dc is picking it up from I think. Those shows are banned in my house now.
  • Dr BM,

    Please stop lying to your children about your finances and money in general.

    1) You did not loose their inheirtance because of the market crash, you bought a poool and pool house.

    2) We did not NOT pay to send SS to you for your Christmas Visitation, YOU CHOSE not to pay for him - as per the court order...not to mention you did not pay your half of the summer visitations costs or your spring breaks (two of them).

    2. b) Please do not forget to remind them of the new hardwood floors, new siding on the house, the riding lawnmower for 1/4 acre lot, and the new dinning room/living room furniture you bought DURING those three years....

    3) You are not poor.  You make just under $42,000 and live in an extremely low COLA area.  You have the Government Health Insurance.  You have no car payment and you bought your $102,000 house with $40,000 from the sale of your previous house (you know the one...the marital house that DH bought and paid for with ONLY his salary).

    Now if you are actually POOR, that poor planning is not OUR fault nor is it up to us to pick up your slack?

    4) YOU HAVE NOT PAID CHILD SUPPORT FOR OVER 4 YEARS.  PERIOD.

    5) which brings me to final point - not only can you NOT claim SS on the taxes (you arent supporting him, so no way are you getting the credit), even if you DID,

    why  are you telling him that he would get $4000 towards a car if Dad let you claim him?  You wouldnt even GET THAT MUCH, let alone actually GIVE HIM any of that money...your track record (remember that inheritance?) tells us grown-ups that wont happen.

    Sincerely

    StepMother who no longer keeps her mouth shut about these things. Its gonna be fun when SS talks to you next? How are you going to explain the above points?

    DH

    If YOU drop something and you are between the dropped item and me, why is it MY FAULT for not a) letting you know you dropped it and b) picking up YOUR dropped item?


    Same thing goes for YOUR lost items.  I know I have a bad memory for things like this, so I am very very very very careful to NOT MOVE YOUR ***.  So if you cannto find YOUR WEDDING RING, your SOL, not me.  

    This pattern of dissasociation is starting to wear on our marriage. 

    Your not so loving wife

    file:///Users/Ilumine/Desktop/Family%20Portrait%20for%20gift.jpg
  • imageSigir:
    imageFutureMrsWittig:

    imageJ&A2008:
    8+9 are the worst ages, imo.  I thought it was just oldest SS, but middle one is going through it now.  It's like they just learn how to be mouthy or sarcastic, and they don't know how to filter it.

    Yup.

    I don't know about you, but my hypothesis is that it has something to do w all those Disney Chanel and teen nick shows like victorious, shake it up, etc. All the kids on those shows have such attitude and that is where my dc is picking it up from I think. Those shows are banned in my house now.

    Ours too.  Disney has become such a disappointment in the last several years.

    Mama of 2: one who grew in my womb, both who grow in my heart.
  • Dear SD, Thank you for being you!  Wish we could have you ALL the time.  Hang in there, things will get better!   Love, Me

    Dear FI, Can't wait to make you a daddy again!  Can't wait to be your wife.  Love, Me    PS: please stop smoking. :)

     

    Dear BD, Seriously?!? Get a clue on how to raise our special needs son.  And please stop feeding him fast food as he is overweight already.  Sincerely, Me 

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  • imagemccall0113:

    Dear SD, Thank you for being you!  Wish we could have you ALL the time.  Hang in there, things will get better!   Love, Me

    Dear FI, Can't wait to make you a daddy again!  Can't wait to be your wife.  Love, Me    PS: please stop smoking. :)

     

    Dear BD, Seriously?!? Get a clue on how to raise our special needs son.  And please stop feeding him fast food as he is overweight already.  Sincerely, Me 

    Can I ask you what special needs your son is?  I have a good friend who's son is downs and they are having a horrible problem with his weight.

  • Dear BD,

    Stop saying how much you miss DS when you didn't even call during the week he was sick with the flu and pneumonia at the same time. I am not the bad guy, you make zero effort to see him and that is why he doesn't to go to you when you come to pick him up. Also, your GF's kids are not more important than your own son. You keep changing plans to accomodate them and screwing DS over in the process. Keep it up and you will never have a good relationship, and I wouldn't care in the least. Also, pay the damn child support. I have no sympathy for you raising your GF's 3 kids that aren't yours, plus the new baby. That is no excuse not to support your child.

    Sincerely,

    Not the b!tch you make me out to be

    Dear FI,

    You don't need to be so angry with BD about how much of a bad dad he is. His life is screwed up enough, karma obviously got him. Just sit back and enjoy the great family life we have without worrying about BD.

    Love always,

    your soon-to-be wife

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    image
  • (non BF)

    Dear Ex guy I used to date,

    I can't help but secretly laugh when you told me today that your wife, the mother of your two children got drunk and had sex with TWO of your friends at your new years eve party while you were sleeping.  But I am happy that you are working on your marriage.  I certainly couldn't do it.

    Dear H,

    I thought it was super sweet of you to pick up SS from his Mom's to bring him over and help him with his math homework.  You did this after you woke up for work at 1:30 am and had to be up again at 1:30 am.  You are a great father.  I would of hired a tutor and i am sorry that I made that suggestion to you.

    Love,

    M

     

  • Dear 15yo,

    Thanks for being you. You make me laugh when your brother is on my last nerve, and I am truly appreciating the time we get to spend together since your dad and brother don't like horror movies. How about we go see Mama after tubing next weekend?

    Love, The 2nd Ginger Hunter

     

    Dear 11yo,

    You're a cute mini-me of your dad, but you have to stop trying to use that to your advantage because it's just not going to work anymore.  We took you to the grocery store to buy foods you like to eat -- please stop saying you're going to starve unless I feed you Taco Bell. I am not listening anymore. Also, thank you for my cool Doctor Who shirt that you gave me for Christmas (I'm still getting compliments when I wear it to work.) You're going to love tubing next weekend!

    Love, The Weird One

     

    Dear SO,

    I Iove you and your kids.  Please stop giving in to BM every time she guilt trips you into giving up a weekend. I miss them when they aren't with us (and because a TV show premiers is not a good excuse. WE HAVE CABLE!) Thanks for hanging out with me and Pops all day, I know you would have rather been playing PS3. I LOVE YOU!

    Love, Your Clinger 

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  • imageSigir:
    imageFutureMrsWittig:

    imageJ&A2008:
    8+9 are the worst ages, imo.  I thought it was just oldest SS, but middle one is going through it now.  It's like they just learn how to be mouthy or sarcastic, and they don't know how to filter it.

    Yup.



    I don't know about you, but my hypothesis is that it has something to do w all those Disney Chanel and teen nick shows like victorious, shake it up, etc. All the kids on those shows have such attitude and that is where my dc is picking it up from I think. Those shows are banned in my house now.


    I noticed this too. I even told my SS those kids have bratty attitudes and he agreed.

    For us 56 was miserable but now SS is so fun at almost 8. He learns something new everyday and asks so many questions. I love it. I tell all my friends I wish they could come from the womb 8 years old. Maybe it's different if they're girls. An 8 year old girl would make me nervous!
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  • imageSigir:
    imageFutureMrsWittig:

    imageJ&A2008:
    8+9 are the worst ages, imo.  I thought it was just oldest SS, but middle one is going through it now.  It's like they just learn how to be mouthy or sarcastic, and they don't know how to filter it.

    Yup.

    I don't know about you, but my hypothesis is that it has something to do w all those Disney Chanel and teen nick shows like victorious, shake it up, etc. All the kids on those shows have such attitude and that is where my dc is picking it up from I think. Those shows are banned in my house now.

    I totally agree with you here! I never even knew what was on all of those channels until my SKs moved in with us last summer. SS, 11, and SD, 7, don't have much for attitudes and, when they are a little snarky, we make sure they know it's not accepted in our household. HOWEVER, I teach grade 6 and spend a lot of time around 11 - 13 years olds and HOLY MAN!!! I now understand where a lot of their phrases, sarcasm, and tone comes from. It's like they walked right off the set of some of those shows. Whatever happened to the innocence of Saved By The Bell etc? lol

    Happily married to my Snorkelbutt - 07/31/10

    BFP #1 09/02/11  M/C 09/12/11 8w6days
    BFP #2 07/18/12 Baby S born on his EDD 03/23/13

    SS - age 12...SD - age 8...DS - 13 mos.
  • Dear BF,
    Maybe you could start making CS payments since you owe $16,791 in arrears and you have been working for 5 months now making good money,Preferably before you plan your wedding (to a girl you just met 4 months ago), plan a Disney vacation with our DD when you have supervised visits that don't allow you to leave the state with her. When you came around after you partied like a rock star, forgot all about our beautiful little girl & ended up in jail & a 6 mo rehab, the rehab you were in advised you to stay clear of any sexual/dating relationship for atleast two years & to build a bond with your daughter that didn't see you for too long. If you're going to ignore all that advice, what good came out of you tormenting & confusing her by leaving her to question why you didnt want to see her.
  • imagekali55:

    Dear BM,

    If you want cooperation from DH please stop name calling and telling him he is selfish.  You get more bees with honey, try to keep that in mind, m'kay?

    Dear SD1,

    What's with the attitude?  You are 8, not 16, please stop acting like an adult.  You are a child, have fun!

    Sincerely, 

    Me

    I am having the same problem with my 8 year old D. Fighting over clothes at 7 something in the morning doesn't start the day off great after being up half the night with our 5 month old DS.

  • imagejenjen930:

    Dear DH,

    What were you thinking?!?  Wink

    Love,
    Your Wife

    ^^ Seriously my thoughts on a weekly basis.

    Dear BM,

    It's been 7 years, time to grow up Buttercup.  You've been playing the "woe is me I'm a single mom boo hoo" card for far too long.  Get a job and quit using the fact that you choose to volunteer in K's class every frigging day as an excuse to not work and provide for your daughter. You're 30 years old now, grow up and act like it.  Show your daughter what a self sufficient successful woman looks like.  Maybe if you started setting a better example for her, K would stop looking to me to be that positive female role model for her and then you could stop feeling so threatened by my involvement.

    And seriously, Disneyland passes are not more important than moving out of Gma's house and giving K her own room and bed.  Get your priorities straight!!

    Sincerely,

    Tired of Shaking my Head at Your Dumb Choices

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  • Dear ExW,

    I desperately wish I could understand your actions.  I am thrilled it appears you are no longer abusing pain medication and you and your DH are happy.  Alienating your DD from her father is not going to be a good thing, in the long run.  It make placate her now, but in 10 years, she may start questioning your statements.  I wonder how you will justify blocking any and all communication with her father.  He is desperately trying anything to have contact with her.  Please, please for DD's sake, remember that she didn't ask for you to have an affair and take her half the country away from her home and father.  

    Cordially,

    Not your competition

    Dear DH,

    I know you're tired.  I know you're frustrated.  I know you're terrified this is not going to end well.  I understand and I'm trying to help.  I've never been in a situation like this before and I'm trying to figure out the appropriate steps.  I love you and I support your decisions.  Please, keep in mind we have a marriage too.  At times, it feels as if we spend more time talking about your ExW than anything else.  Can we have some time together without the drama?  Maybe an hour?

    Love,

    Your Wife

    p.s. Please take out the garbage when it's full, not two days after I take it out of the garbage can.  It's annoying

    Dear SD,

    I know you're mad.  I know you feel abandoned and you don't understand why all of these changes happened to you.  I understand that and my heart breaks for you.  I also know you're eight years old and none of this makes sense.  Please, please, please try to remember your daddy loves you more than anything in this world and beyond.  He misses you and doesn't want to take you away from your home.  He wants to spend some time with you.  New places are scary.  He and I will do everything we can to make it easier for you.

    Love,

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