Asked if I was "expecting" a baby shower for #2

bundlesofjoy · January 2013

LOL! I saw the post yesterday about repeat baby showers and then last night my mom carefully and delicately tried to broach the subject of whether I "expected" a baby shower for my second. The kids are only 5 years apart and I kept EVERYTHING from DS. At first I didn't know what she was getting at, but once I realized, I quickly reassured her that no, I didn't see a reason to have a second baby shower. If people feel inclined to give a gift it is at their feelings and discretion but that I am not expecting anything other than happiness about my LO and a healthy baby. She was so relieved. I just laughed. She then said she wanted to get me stuff for the baby anyway which I responded, great, let me know if you need suggestions!

I have started an amazon wishlist but it is more for me then other people and I haven't told anyone about it.

I Love my Dave · January 2013

I don't think you are suppose to have two showers

bundlesofjoy · January 2013

Agreed, for my first it was planned by my girlfriends and mom before I even got to thinking about it and we had a blast so I didn't even have time to decide my feelings on it really. But this one, naw, I would feel uncomfortable about it actually.

Erinm278 · January 2013

I side eye people who have more than one baby shower. I didn't go to DH's cousin's second shower.

BCsSweetness · January 2013

I had one with DD and another with DS... but it was only because they were different genders! I had EVERYTHING for girl and nothing for a boy! I was very thankful for the second one.

This time, I'd like to have a small one just because my youngest is 7 and we've gotten rid of pretty much everything. We have special baby clothes, but not much. I'm definately NOT expecting it, but it would be lovely.

BelhurstBride · January 2013

Erinm278:
I side eye people who have more than one baby shower. I didn't go to DH's cousin's second shower.

Ugh, I kind of hate to admit it on here but so do I. I've only ever actually heard of them happening on here; I don't know anyone IRL who have had two.

BCsSweetness · January 2013

somerandomchick:
BCsSweetness:
I had one with DD and another with DS... but it was only because they were different genders! nbsp;I had EVERYTHING for girl and nothing for a boy! nbsp;I was very thankful for the second one.This time, I'd like to have a small one just because my youngest is 7 and we've gotten rid of pretty much everything. nbsp;We have special baby clothes, but not much. nbsp;I'm definately NOT expecting it, but it would be lovely.nbsp;
I definitely poo poi second or third showers even with a big gap or diff genders... It's your responsibility to buy them clothes and you shouldn't have a second baby if you can't afford it! And if you can afford to clothe them you don't really need a shower do you... I'm pg with my first and wavering on bring team green but I'm hoping to buy and register for lots of neutral stuff so it can be reused for 2nd baby later.

I think that is being slightly unfair. You don't know the back story or the state we were in when the second shower was thrown. I didn't ask for it. My DD was only 15 months old and honestly we didn't have the money to buy the extra things. DS was a COMPLETE shock! And yes, accidents do happen.

This time around is completely different, and if I don't get a shower, then I don't. But it would be fun to be with family and friends for the sake of being with them. It is certainly not expected.

+ASH+ · January 2013

BelhurstBride:
Ugh, I kind of hate to admit it on here but so do I. I've only ever actually heard of them happening on here; I don't know anyone IRL who have had two.

It's the opposite with me - before I came on here, I never knew it was "unacceptable" to have more than one. I've grown up with everyone I know always having a second (and sometimes third) shower. It's an acceptable tradition here. I've hosted a few myself. It's always much smaller - the guest list being family and close friends who would buy the gift anyway, so it's just putting all the gifts in one location at one time and having fun for a brunch or afternoon tea - but it's never "expected".

Kimmy9j · January 2013

My BFF who planned my wedding shower and baby shower a year apart asked to throw me a sprinkle.. Twice. I think she likes planning.

I declined and said if we could just get the girls together for lunch out I would love it.

Sometimes its the "Hostess" whose breaking ettiquette not the Momma

bundlesofjoy · January 2013

Kimmy9j:
My BFF who planned my wedding shower and baby shower a year apart asked to throw me a sprinkle.. Twice. I think she likes planning.
I declined and said if we could just get the girls together for lunch out I would love it.
Sometimes its the "Hostess" whose breaking ettiquette not the Momma

Ha ha! Sprinkle, love it!

+ASH+ · January 2013

Kimmy - I just had to say I LOVE the Willy Wonka meme in your sig!!! Every time I hear someone say "Birth Plan" I cringe and then laugh (happens when I'm watching A Baby Story a lot lol!).

Kimmy9j · January 2013

+ASH+:
Kimmy - I just had to say I LOVE the Willy Wonka meme in your sig!!! Every time I hear someone say "Birth Plan" I cringe and then laugh (happens when I'm watching A Baby Story a lot lol!).

Thank You! he makes me giggle.

knsh11 · January 2013

BCsSweetness:
somerandomchick:
BCsSweetness:
I had one with DD and another with DS... but it was only because they were different genders! nbsp;I had EVERYTHING for girl and nothing for a boy! nbsp;I was very thankful for the second one.This time, I'd like to have a small one just because my youngest is 7 and we've gotten rid of pretty much everything. nbsp;We have special baby clothes, but not much. nbsp;I'm definately NOT expecting it, but it would be lovely.nbsp;
I definitely poo poi second or third showers even with a big gap or diff genders... It's your responsibility to buy them clothes and you shouldn't have a second baby if you can't afford it! And if you can afford to clothe them you don't really need a shower do you... I'm pg with my first and wavering on bring team green but I'm hoping to buy and register for lots of neutral stuff so it can be reused for 2nd baby later.

I think that is being slightly unfair. You don't know the back story or the state we were in when the second shower was thrown. I didn't ask for it. My DD was only 15 months old and honestly we didn't have the money to buy the extra things. DS was a COMPLETE shock! And yes, accidents do happen.
This time around is completely different, and if I don't get a shower, then I don't. But it would be fun to be with family and friends for the sake of being with them. It is certainly not expected.

Didn't you still have everything from your DD?

nyki06 · January 2013

BCsSweetness:
somerandomchick:
BCsSweetness:
I had one with DD and another with DS... but it was only because they were different genders! nbsp;I had EVERYTHING for girl and nothing for a boy! nbsp;I was very thankful for the second one.This time, I'd like to have a small one just because my youngest is 7 and we've gotten rid of pretty much everything. nbsp;We have special baby clothes, but not much. nbsp;I'm definately NOT expecting it, but it would be lovely.nbsp;
I definitely poo poi second or third showers even with a big gap or diff genders... It's your responsibility to buy them clothes and you shouldn't have a second baby if you can't afford it! And if you can afford to clothe them you don't really need a shower do you... I'm pg with my first and wavering on bring team green but I'm hoping to buy and register for lots of neutral stuff so it can be reused for 2nd baby later.

I think that is being slightly unfair. You don't know the back story or the state we were in when the second shower was thrown. I didn't ask for it. My DD was only 15 months old and honestly we didn't have the money to buy the extra things. DS was a COMPLETE shock! And yes, accidents do happen.
This time around is completely different, and if I don't get a shower, then I don't. But it would be fun to be with family and friends for the sake of being with them. It is certainly not expected.

Even if you have an accidental pregnancy a baby really doesn't need that much. If you have enough clothes to go through and rewash, a place for baby to sleep, diapers, and either breastmilk or formula that's all a baby actually needs. I think we get caught up on all of the extras. Plus, people generally don't get you diapers and formula at showers because they aren't fun things to buy. I don't really care about whether or not people have multiple showers because where I grew up it wasn't looked down on but the idea that you need a shower to provide for your kid is a little silly to me.

scarletangel · January 2013

Kimmy9j:
My BFF who planned my wedding shower and baby shower a year apart asked to throw me a sprinkle.. Twice. I think she likes planning.
I declined and said if we could just get the girls together for lunch out I would love it.
Sometimes its the "Hostess" whose breaking ettiquette not the Momma

This. My SIL has wanted to throw me a 2nd shower from the moment I told her I was pregnant again. I told her I was uncomfortable with doing one if we had another boy, but maybe a sprinkle if it's a girl. Well, we found out it's a girl and she was so excited because now she gets to throw a shower. She actually said she was really sad when I told her I didn't want another shower. Needless to say, she is throwing a shower. I don't think she would have taken no for an answer. If it makes her happy, that is fine with me. I certainly don't need a shower, but a small celebration (just family) to celebrate a new addition doesn't bother me.

exhausted8 · January 2013

My coworker is pregnant and throwing herself a second baby shower. Her daughter just turned a year a few months ago. I seem to be the only one at work side-eyeing her!

RumbleLina · January 2013

I have a friend who tried to tell me I needed to throw her a baby shower for her second child because she didn't have anything. Her daughter was not even 3 yet. Needless to say, I didn't and I did not feel bad about it either considering she kind of just expected it so rudely. She also expected her family to throw her one too, no idea if that happened.

AvidVertigo · January 2013

I don't expect one, I have nearly everything I had from DS. I did make a registry, mainly for the completion coupon I could use to get our double stroller and a few other things I would like to get 20% off with. If people ask, I will politely decline.

FWIW, I was just invited to a baby shower for a girl who is one her 4th child. I do not plan on attending.

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