Since you have a couple older children, I want to know how you handle chores. We really don't have SD do really any chores besides clean her room. Since I'm a SAHM, I take care of most cleaning, but I feel she's at an age of some sort of responsibility. If I've ever asked her to do something here and there, she's game with whatever. She really has no schedule from our home to her mother's, so it's difficult to create a chore schedule. That's a whole other issue... Do your two oldest have specific chores all of the time or do they rotate? I also have a rule in place that if she doesn't take her dirty clothes to the laundry room for an extended period of time, she gets to clean them herself.
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Re: ***PSD***
E does a bunch of chores. He helps me empty the dishwasher sometimes but not always. He cleans the toilet in his bathroom and the powder room once a week. He will sometimes do the master bath and basement toilet if I am busy. He vacuums his room and the babies and the hallway as well as sweeps and vacuums or Swiffers the entire first floor and finished part of our basement once a week and as needed in between. He is also responsible for helping to walk the dog and feed the dog, fish and hermit crab. I fold his laundry and he carries it to his room and puts it away, he also is responsible for putting it in the laundry basket and helping me sort it. He sets the table and sometimes helps me cook and usually when MH is doing things out in the yard that don't involve the lawn mower or weed whacker he goes out there and helps as best he can.
ETA: I forgot about dusting. He dusts the first floor and his room and is required to help with Lola as needed.
We struggle somewhat on being consistent. but here it is:
Other random things they help with sometimes
matching socks
folding laundry
vacuuming
dusting
garden work
shovel the driveway
I do not have them:
clean toilets or use any harsh chemicals
mow the grass (way to steep for O)
use the snowblower
wash laundry
use the stove, oven, knives when I'm not around
I have to say Oliver is really good at helping when asked or reminded. Sometimes I don't bother with Audrey because it is easier just to do it myself.