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Baby in my bed advice

Ward0317Ward0317
in Attachment Parenting

My 8 month old just started wanting to sleep in our bed (he never really liked it before). I love having him close but he takes up so much room and he is a light sleeper. He is having a separation issue so he wakes up a lot and wants to be held all night. Im ok with that because he is only little once... but we are trying for another baby and I was hoping he would be sleeping decently in his own bed by the time the new baby comes. There just isnt enough room for everyone.lol

 Is it difficult to eventually get a child out of your bed and back in theirs?

Most people are not helpful. They just tell me to let him cry and I find that unexceptionable. I dont mind him in our bed but I think my husband does. He wants his "room" back 

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Re: Baby in my bed advice

  • ncbellencbelle member

    If you are happy with things in the moment...roll with it.  Both of my kids slept with me full time until 15 months or so when we started moving them to their own beds.  Now is not forever.

    If you aren't happy bed sharing, I'd check out the No Cry Sleep Solution for some ideas on helping baby sleep that don't involve CIO. 



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  • nosoup4unosoup4u member
    Both my kids transitioned to their own beds between 18 and 24ish months. But we didn't push it very much, either. It wasn't especially hard getting them to transition. But also, neither of my kids fully STTN until past two, which might be something to think about if you're wanting two under two.

    Good Night, Sleep Tight by Kim West has some gentle sleep training methods, too. hth
    DS1 - Feb 2008

    DS2 - Oct 2010 (my VBAC baby!)

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  • boogerbearoriginalboogerbearoriginal member

    I'm in the do what works for your family camp - so if bedsharing means everyone gets a good nights rest, then roll with it.

    I don't think an 8m old in bed will mean he will be there at 18. After all, babies grow out of lots of things, like their crib!, so it's not like what you do now dooms you forever.

    But, I would caution you that if you're planning for 2u2 there's a very good chance the older baby will still be getting up at night.  It's very common for LOs to not consistently sleep 12hrs straight until they are 2 or 3 years old.



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  • RioG1978RioG1978 member
    imagencbelle:

    If you are happy with things in the moment...roll with it.  Both of my kids slept with me full time until 15 months or so when we started moving them to their own beds.  Now is not forever.

    If you aren't happy bed sharing, I'd check out the No Cry Sleep Solution for some ideas on helping baby sleep that don't involve CIO. 

    ncbelle - did you find it difficult to transition them at that age?  I have a 7.5 month old very similar to the OP's baby, and while it is working well for us for now, I do envision having 2 under 2 (or close to that) so and curious how much harder it will be later on as opposed to now.

    My gut tells me it will be easier as a toddler rather than a baby experiencing separation anxiety but I don't know if that makes me crazy or not. :D

     

     

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  • Still free to be meStill free to be me member

    If space in your bed is a big part of why you want to transition, sidecarring the crib or putting another mattress right next to yours (or simply getting a bigger mattress) might help you all get better sleep. 

    We currently bedshare with our 7 month old and 3 1/2 year old.  The younger one sleeps on the bed with DH and I.  The older sleeps either in the sidecarred crib (which is intended for the younger) or her single bed, which is right next to the crib. 

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  • eav2ceav2c member

    I like ncbelles sentiment: Now is not forever. A great reminder for myself as sometimes bedsharing feels like it'll go on forever.

    I think there are many avenues you can try that are gentle such as the No Cry Sleep Solution, The Sleep Lady Shuffle, and the Pick Up Put Down Method.  I'm not a huge fan of sleep training, mostly because it seems like it was always a major setback for us, but many women on my BMB have had great success with the above mentioned strategies. Best of luck.

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  • katncrackkatncrack
    Our 18 month old sleeps with us and started at one year. She just sleeps better there and of course so do we. If she is in her crib she still wakes up at night. My feeling is that it could be years of this but as long as we are sleeping it is all good with me. However I don't have another one on the way.
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  • lynn08016lynn08016
    I'm looking for similar advice. My LO is almost 11mos and I am ready for her to move to the crib. She takes up a lot space and moves around a lot, which ruins my sleep! However, when put in the crib she only sleeps a few hours before waking. Now I feel like I have to choose between her sleep or mine. I cannot use the CIO method; I can't go through with it. I will try some of the suggestions listed, though.
    Ms. CLD
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