Some of your men are A-holey

Alaskamom1 · January 2013

So, i've been thinking this for awhile, so I'm just gonna come out and say it...some of your husbands/partners really suck. Over the past (almost) year, I've read some of the horrible $hit that a few of you ladies have posted and I can't believe that you even put up with it! I'm not going to bring up specific incidents but seriously it makes me so upset!! Am I the only one that has been blown away by some of the complaints that have been posted on here? If my DH treated me how some of you have been treated his a$$ would be out the door...anyone else think some of the dudes are a bit A-holey?

CnAnA · January 2013

That was somewhat random...

But yeah, I agree. I also take everything with a grain of salt. Not saying the ladies here aren't truthful, but I know I tend to exaggerate the severity of a situation when I'm pissed. So when I come on here and rip on Husband for doing something dumb, once I calm down things don't seem nearly so drastic.

Alaskamom1 · January 2013

Not so random - someone posted something a few posts below that a DH said and it blew my mind. So mean..

candaceleigh21 · January 2013

MH says and does some real ahole shiz but I totally felt bad for the girl in the FFFC post. Her husband actually sounded like a d!ck.

Rachelilly23 · January 2013

candaceleigh21:
MH says and does some real ahole shiz but I totally felt bad for the girl in the FFFC post. Her husband actually sounded like a d!ck.

I think you're probably referring to me. I am thinking it's

mostly DH being stressed and stretched so thin at work

that he's taking it out on me, but my productivity level is a

common argument in our house because we both went to

a top university and he thinks I have no ambition anymore.

He has a tough time understanding the demands of a SAHM

I guess. I wish he'd be a little more compassionate with

what I'm dealing with right now, but I could probably bend a

little too and set some goals for myself and work on them

slowly so he doesn't see me becoming a useless housewife.

He definitely has high expectations, but I know how effing

hard he works so I should make sure he sees how hard I

work, too! Make sense? If it wasn't me you meant, then

ignore, but I know I had a pretty big FFFC post that probably

highlighted him being a huge jerk.

candaceleigh21 · January 2013

Rachelilly23:
candaceleigh21:
MH says and does some real ahole shiz but I totally felt bad for the girl in the FFFC post. Her husband actually sounded like a d!ck.
I think you're probably referring to me. I am thinking it's
mostly DH being stressed and stretched so thin at work
that he's taking it out on me, but my productivity level is a
common argument in our house because we both went to
a top university and he thinks I have no ambition anymore.
He has a tough time understanding the demands of a SAHM
I guess. I wish he'd be a little more compassionate with
what I'm dealing with right now, but I could probably bend a
little too and set some goals for myself and work on them
slowly so he doesn't see me becoming a useless housewife.
He definitely has high expectations, but I know how effing
hard he works so I should make sure he sees how hard I
work, too! Make sense?  If it wasn't me you meant, then
ignore, but I know I had a pretty big FFFC post that probably
highlighted him being a huge jerk.

Yes!! It was you! I wanted so badly to write directly back to you yesterday but never had time to dig through the million posts again. I just want you to know that I sympathize with you on so many levels. I quit my demanding full time job to be a SAHM. MH has no idea what that entails. He has never
Brought up the bumb because he knows that this is my outlet but he has said other similar things. Just know that you arent alone and you dont deserve all the harshness no matter how stretched thin he is. know that I dont know you IRL but I am sure you are an amazing mother and I personally know that you work your butt off in a way that he or most people could never understand. Keep it up and know that we are all here for ya!

rakle99 · January 2013

I know when I need to vent I only complain about the negative. But that doesn't mean what I'm talking about is the norm. I assumed it was the same.

ChrisG83 · January 2013

rakle99:
I know when I need to vent I only complain about the negative. But that doesn't mean what I'm talking about is the norm. I assumed it was the same.

I agree with this. I have a great husband but he has a one or two jerk moments and if you are married to someone for 30 plus years each of us is bound to have one no matter how good your marriage is and how well you treat each other. Now if it's more consistent or even on a monthly basis then that's not good.

Rachelilly23 · January 2013

candaceleigh21:
Rachelilly23:
candaceleigh21:
MH says and does some real ahole shiz but I totally felt bad for the girl in the FFFC post. Her husband actually sounded like a d!ck.
I think you're probably referring to me. I am thinking it's
mostly DH being stressed and stretched so thin at work
that he's taking it out on me, but my productivity level is a
common argument in our house because we both went to
a top university and he thinks I have no ambition anymore.
He has a tough time understanding the demands of a SAHM
I guess. I wish he'd be a little more compassionate with
what I'm dealing with right now, but I could probably bend a
little too and set some goals for myself and work on them
slowly so he doesn't see me becoming a useless housewife.
He definitely has high expectations, but I know how effing
hard he works so I should make sure he sees how hard I
work, too! Make sense? If it wasn't me you meant, then
ignore, but I know I had a pretty big FFFC post that probably
highlighted him being a huge jerk.
Yes!! It was you! I wanted so badly to write directly back to you yesterday but never had time to dig through the million posts again. I just want you to know that I sympathize with you on so many levels. I quit my demanding full time job to be a SAHM. MH has no idea what that entails. He has never Brought up the bumb because he knows that this is my outlet but he has said other similar things. Just know that you arent alone and you dont deserve all the harshness no matter how stretched thin he is. know that I dont know you IRL but I am sure you are an amazing mother and I personally know that you work your butt off in a way that he or most people could never understand. Keep it up and know that we are all here for ya!

Thanks! I'm never going to stop posting just because he thinks

it's useless. Like you said, it's an outlet! He and I definitely have

our issues though and have talked about counseling but the timing

just never is in our favor.

Mrs.G123 · January 2013

Rachelilly23:
candaceleigh21:
MH says and does some real ahole shiz but I totally felt bad for the girl in the FFFC post. Her husband actually sounded like a d!ck.
I think you're probably referring to me. I am thinking it's
mostly DH being stressed and stretched so thin at work
that he's taking it out on me, but my productivity level is a
common argument in our house because we both went to
a top university and he thinks I have no ambition anymore.
He has a tough time understanding the demands of a SAHM
I guess. I wish he'd be a little more compassionate with
what I'm dealing with right now, but I could probably bend a
little too and set some goals for myself and work on them
slowly so he doesn't see me becoming a useless housewife.
He definitely has high expectations, but I know how effing
hard he works so I should make sure he sees how hard I
work, too! Make sense?  If it wasn't me you meant, then
ignore, but I know I had a pretty big FFFC post that probably
highlighted him being a huge jerk.

Your productivity level?!?!? Does your h think that the house cleans itself, or that the food cooks itself? Have you left him alone with the kids for a day? You should do this then harsh on him about his productivity level.

Sorry you are dealing with this but it's fucckingridiculous.

cardiganmom · January 2013

I'm not a SAHM but I've been on maternity leave for the least few months. My husband hasn't said anything negative about what I do during the day, but I went out with my girlfriends for the day, gone for 6 hours and he watched the baby. When I got back, I said, so do you see how hard it is to ake care of her and the house all day and he said he didn't realize how hard it'd be. Unless they're not put in the position, they don't know what it's like.

Rachelilly23 · January 2013

Mrs.G123:
Your productivity level?!?!? Does your h think that the house cleans itself, or that the food cooks itself? Have you left him alone with the kids for a day? You should do this then harsh on him about his productivity level.Sorry you are dealing with this but it's fucckingridiculous.

Yeah, it sort of is He just doesn't have an appreciation for a nice house. And I do keep the house nice and organized, and he has a fresh cooked meal every day. I really don't get why he complains so much. Hence the need for counseling. I keep saying we'll get to it, but it just never happens. I know we have to figure it out because it's definitely unfair. I have left him alone with the kids and he thinks it's easy, but he also doesn't nurse the baby, which is a lot more time intensive and draining than giving him a bottle like he obviously does when I'm not there. And he also doesn't clean. Sooooo he thinks I do nothing. His point it that while I'm sitting on my phone nursing the baby, I could be studying or learning something instead of being on here. I don't know why he cares so much what I do with the small amounts of spare time I have.

PixelPosy · January 2013

My DH is an a-hole at times and he knows it. Here is a conversation we had this morning... After being an arse all morning, he goes I'm just piling it on you today, aren't I? I responded with yep, if you're trying to make me cry keep going. He responds, I'm not trying to make you cry, I'm just trying to shame you into changing your ways. WTF?

But that's just a glimpse of him... he's at his worse when he's stressed at work, lack of sex, and sick... which we have all 3 going on right now. We've been together 10 years, it's just one of his personality quirks... it doesn't make him a bad guy, husband or dad though. If he was an a-hole 24/7 I wouldn't be with him.

Mrs.G123 · January 2013

Rachelilly23:
Mrs.G123:
Your productivity level?!?!? Does your h think that the house cleans itself, or that the food cooks itself? Have you left him alone with the kids for a day? You should do this then harsh on him about his productivity level.Sorry you are dealing with this but it's fucckingridiculous.
Yeah, it sort of is He just doesn't have an appreciation for a nice house. And I do keep the house nice and organized, and he has a fresh cooked meal every day. I really don't get why he complains so much. Hence the need for counseling. I keep saying we'll get to it, but it just never happens. I know we have to figure it out because it's definitely unfair. I have left him alone with the kids and he thinks it's easy, but he also doesn't nurse the baby, which is a lot more time intensive and draining than giving him a bottle like he obviously does when I'm not there. And he also doesn't clean. Sooooo he thinks I do nothing. His point it that while I'm sitting on my phone nursing the baby, I could be studying or learning something instead of being on here. I don't know why he cares so much what I do with the small amounts of spare time I have.

Dude. I'm sorry. This is so lame. Does HE learn Mandarin Chinese in his down time?!

Rachelilly23 · January 2013

PixelPosy:
My DH is an a-hole at times and he knows it. Here is a conversation we had this morning... After being an arse all morning, he goes I'm just piling it on you today, aren't I? I responded with yep, if you're trying to make me cry keep going. He responds, I'm not trying to make you cry, I'm just trying to shame you into changing your ways. WTF?
But that's just a glimpse of him... he's at his worse when he's stressed at work, lack of sex, and sick... which we have all 3 going on right now. We've been together 10 years, it's just one of his personality quirks... it doesn't make him a bad guy, husband or dad though. If he was an a-hole 24/7 I wouldn't be with him.

Um, I think we're married to the same guy. Sounds exactly

like the things DH says to me.

Rachelilly23 · January 2013

Mrs.G123:
Rachelilly23:
Mrs.G123:
Your productivity level?!?!? Does your h think that the house cleans itself, or that the food cooks itself? Have you left him alone with the kids for a day? You should do this then harsh on him about his productivity level.Sorry you are dealing with this but it's fucckingridiculous.
Yeah, it sort of is He just doesn't have an appreciation for a nice house. And I do keep the house nice and organized, and he has a fresh cooked meal every day. I really don't get why he complains so much. Hence the need for counseling. I keep saying we'll get to it, but it just never happens. I know we have to figure it out because it's definitely unfair. I have left him alone with the kids and he thinks it's easy, but he also doesn't nurse the baby, which is a lot more time intensive and draining than giving him a bottle like he obviously does when I'm not there. And he also doesn't clean. Sooooo he thinks I do nothing. His point it that while I'm sitting on my phone nursing the baby, I could be studying or learning something instead of being on here. I don't know why he cares so much what I do with the small amounts of spare time I have.
Dude. I'm sorry. This is so lame. Does HE learn Mandarin Chinese in his down time?!

Yep. The man loves to learn. He loves video games though too,

so it's not like he's productive 24/7.

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