New BMB is depressing

Stewartandmaura · January 2013

I guess I joined our Oct '11 board late in the game, definitely after the first tri. It seems like on my new bmb (aug13) there are 2-3 announcements every day of m/c.

It's so sad! And then it makes me overemotional and paranoid. Our first appt isn't until next week. I think I'll just stick around here until then so I don't freak out.

jonnygurl76 · January 2013

M/c aren't contagious!

Elsa1984 · January 2013

I tried to have a friend join Oct '11 way back in the beginning and the miscarriage posts were happening every few days or once a week. So sad! She ended up leaving because she said seeing them so frequently on the board was making her nervous.

Elsa1984 · January 2013

jonnygurl76:
M/c aren't contagious!

This is true. But seeing posts about them on a regular basis...you feel awful for what they are going through and feel sad for them.

mrsgabus · January 2013

Stewartandmaura:
I guess I joined our Oct '11 board late in the game, definitely after the first tri. It seems like on my new bmb (aug13) there are 2-3 announcements every day of m/c.
It's so sad! And then it makes me overemotional and paranoid. Our first appt isn't until next week. I think I'll just stick around here until then so I don't freak out.

No matter where you go there will always be miscarriages.

I totally know how you feel and wish you the best next week

Stewartandmaura · January 2013

jonnygurl76:
M/c aren't contagious!

I know.

And I know the "right" thing to do is to be supportive to those mamas, not to run and hide.

vitan · January 2013

Unfortunately, we saw it here too at the beginning.

punkin05 · January 2013

I didn't realize you are going to be an August 2013 momma too! I definitely understand where you're coming from. My appointment isn't until the 30th, so I get a little pang of nervousness when I see one of those posts. I'm also incredibly sad that it seems to happen to so many lovely ladies.

Stewartandmaura · January 2013

I guess even though you're told how common it is, it never really felt that way to me until I started seeing all the announcements. Naive, yes. Maybe I was living in the world of rainbows and unicorns.

And my biggest apologies for being a spoiled brat to those of you who have gone through it.

Creedon778 · January 2013

Maura I was going to post the same the same thing! It's so depressing! I also wondered if it was the same thing on here back in the day. I really only got involved postbaby.

My ob appt isn't until feb 7 which is another 4 weeks away. Ugh.

LCass · January 2013

Maura, you don't have to apologize at all. Honestly, I've had the same feelings about my new BMB and considered not going back until 2nd tri. It brings up a lot of anxiety, as well as some bad memories of my own m/c. I try to show my support for those women, but there are times when I just can't open the thread (although sometimes I can go back later and then post my condolences).

laabeja · January 2013

Neat to see even more Oct 11 moms on the Aug 13 board! I was around during the beginning (but more of a lurker) the first time and it was the same here. That said, I feel just as nervous this time around as I read the m/c posts. Ugh. I feel bad for those women, but want to run and hide my head in the sand.

diego299 · January 2013

I didn't join Oct BMB until LO was 8months old bc I wasn on IF, PAIF etc. So when I got KTFU again I joined June 2013 immediately. Unfortunaltely my tme on that board was really short but it was hard seeing all the m/c announcements. I understand your need/desire to avoid it and don't fault you at all! Good luck!

aliciaroset · January 2013

I remember feeling both sad and very very lucky when we started seeing m/cs here. I will say that I think that the BMB might not be exactly representative of the rate of m/cs in the world, since many of the women who end up on these boards have tried to get pregnant and/or had prior issues with pregnancy.

That said, the main thing I took away from all the m/c announcements we had was just to feel so lucky that I was still pregnant and so sympathetic for the women who were going through it. Before that m/c was really abstract for me, but knowing when in my pregnancy women were experiencing losses somehow made it more real for me.

BeesMomma00 · January 2013

Stewartandmaura:
I guess I joined our Oct '11 board late in the game, definitely after the first tri. It seems like on my new bmb (aug13) there are 2-3 announcements every day of m/c.
It's so sad! And then it makes me overemotional and paranoid. Our first appt isn't until next week. I think I'll just stick around here until then so I don't freak out.

Obviously... because you would know that this topic is pretty taboo to discuss on TB and can get you some serious flaming. Probably better that you mention it here and NOT on your new BMB.

Yes, loss is heartbreaking. But for others to whine and complain about it when they are still happily with child... just bad taste.

I'm not flaming you, just calling attention to what you obviously weren't around to understand.

Stewartandmaura · January 2013

BeesMomma00:
Stewartandmaura:
I guess I joined our Oct '11 board late in the game, definitely after the first tri. It seems like on my new bmb (aug13) there are 2-3 announcements every day of m/c.
It's so sad! And then it makes me overemotional and paranoid. Our first appt isn't until next week. I think I'll just stick around here until then so I don't freak out.
Obviously... because you would know that this topic is pretty taboo to discuss on TB and can get you some serious flaming. Probably better that you mention it here and NOT on your new BMB.
Yes, loss is heartbreaking. But for others to whine and complain about it when they are still happily with child... just bad taste.
I'm not flaming you, just calling attention to what you obviously weren't around to understand.

Really? You're not?

But it's okay, I deserve it. It was insensitive of me to write that post, especially to those mamas who have experienced it. That's why I apologized.

BeesMomma00 · January 2013

Nope, not flaming. I see how my tone could have come across poorly but it's really just fact. Had you been on the board during the 1st trimester, you would have been through this and REALLY seen some flames. As a matter of fact, I wouldn't be surprised if this exact thing happens on your new BMB. Because someone will say it and the sh!t will fly. Someone may even try to pre-empt the post by warning of it's bad taste. This happened on May 2013 and yet, the post came up and it hit the fan.

I don't get angry or upset which is why I don't consider calling you out "flaming". I actually didn't see your apology until after I had posted. My bad for not reading the full thread. Sorry.

PS... Congrats on the baby and H&H pregnancy to you!

andthatmakes4 · January 2013

I was a mom on the Aug 13 board until I miscarried on Jan 1. I agree it is scary and depressing to see all of the posts! Sorry you've had to see so many.

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