Not buying off the registry

Jessegirl13 · January 2013

Hey all,

I have a shower to attend on the weekend and have discovered all the gifts on the registry in the price range i would spend are have already been bought. Should I get a bunch of small random things off the registry or something she didnt register for that i found really helpful when i had my baby? Which would you prefer if it was your shower?

thanks!!

BeckyTheEngineer · January 2013

Personally, I'd probably prefer the off registry item. I was making it up as I went along back when I registered, and didn't really have a clue what I would really need. A lot of my favorite and most used gifts were things I never thought to register for.

mrshall10210 · January 2013

It's not a lot of fun, but maybe just get her a gift card? You could get one of the small things and a nice card to put with it. Surely there'll be something she didn't get that she could put the money towards.

RockyR12 · January 2013

mrshall10210:
It's not a lot of fun, but maybe just get her a gift card? You could get one of the small things and a nice card to put with it. Surely there'll be something she didn't get that she could put the money towards.

I second the gift card idea. It might be nice to have it to put towards more expensive items that aren't purchased.

RoxyLynn · January 2013

Choose a gift from your experience or get some small items - either is great. Gift cards are no fun to watch people open, even if they are useful.

Jillwithani · January 2013

Going off the registry is awesome, but not necessary. As PPs said you could get a gift card or maybe see if you know anyone else invited that would go on in a bigger gift together?

JaynieByrd · January 2013

Maybe you can supplement one of the smaller registry item(s) with something on her registry that she might like extras of, like diapers or wipes?

a13049 · January 2013

I think either is fine. You could do a combo, purchase a smaller item or two from her registry then pick something out that was useful for you or an outfit. Or pick out a small item or two then add a gift card. I know people love to get the cutesy stuff, but picking up some of the not so glamorous small items off the registry then adding a cute outfit or toy can really help out the new mom.

rhubarb123 · January 2013

Jillwithani:
Going off the registry is awesome, but not necessary. As PPs said you could get a gift card or maybe see if you know anyone else invited that would go on in a bigger gift together?

This. I most likely would give a gift card instead of something I pesonally found helpful with baby. The reason I say that is because maybe it wasn't on her registry because she already has it or someone has given her one.

cinderin · January 2013

I would buy a couple smaller things up to the amount you are looking to spend.

Or a cute outfit and a gift card to wherever she is registered to get to your total.

SunAndRain · January 2013

There was not a single off-registry gift that I received that I don't cherish or was not incredibly useful. Of course I had the basics covered, but my mom friends know about all the little things that made life SO much easier.

I say go with something you found useful!

MsAmeera25 · January 2013

I think if you are going to go off the registry just include a gift receipt just in case she already has the item. There is a lot of items that weren't on my registry because we had 2 work showers between my husband and ,I ppl bought a lot of useful things but I still ended up getting 3 diaper genies and wipe warmers etc Include a gift receipt and you should be fine.

wittyschaffy · January 2013

Another vote for "useful" item - with a gift receipt. That way, if the MTB already has it, she can return it for something else.

Crispity · January 2013

discobelle:
BeckyTheEngineer:
Personally, I'd probably prefer the off registry item. I was making it up as I went along back when I registered, and didn't really have a clue what I would really need. A lot of my favorite and most used gifts were things I never thought to register for.
I agree. I had friends who were experienced Moms who gave me some of their favorite things. They ended up being some of my most useful gifts.

This! I had no clue what I needed when I was registering. It was great to get things that my friends had found useful.

Spacebunny19 · January 2013

I would, if I was the recipient, prefer the random little things on the registry vs. something not on there, no matter how much the giver found it was useful. It's possible she didn't register for it for a reason (has it, doesn't like whatever it is, etc.) and here there are items left on the registry, so if you don't get those items, odds are she'll spend the $ to go get them herself.

My suggestion would be to get a cute basket or other container, and fill it with those random little things. I know I'd love something like that.

BakerMommy · January 2013

I'd go with something you found useful [and maybe even include why you like it] with a gift receipt. Can't go wrong!

eav2c · January 2013

Either or. I sincerely appreciated the gifts that weren't on my registry and ended up using them more than things that were.

mabjcb19 · January 2013

I'd go with a bunch of little things that a new Mom will go through a lot of, nooks, socks, bibs, lotion, soap. If they don't seem like enough add a giftcard. If I go with a bunch of little things I try to find a small basket to put everything in and decorate it to jazz it up.

caladpi02 · January 2013

This happened to me for a friend's shower. I bought her clothes for the 9 to 12 month and 6 to 9 month range. I generally buy clothes for this timeframe if I can't find a registry item or if what I get needs to be beefed up. 9 months seems to be a timeframe for which new moms need clothes.
I know people are suggesting diapers and wipes, but I have never seen those items on a registry or given at a shower.

Adam&Eve2 · January 2013

I would get the off registry gift. The registry is just a suggestion not be all end all. And after I had DD I found some things really useful and others just a waste of money.

If I get invited to a shower I always check the registry but will usually buy them something I know will be useful/make life easier.

ChevyFam717 · January 2013

Did she register for baby medicines? A lot of people forget this... baby orajel, baby motrin, gas releif, boogey wipes, first aid kit, benadryl, suncreen etc. Useful items that people don't think to register for and can be put in a cute basket or something...

If you get something you love make sure you include a gift receipt in case she already has it or someone else get it too...

Gift cards are SO nice in case there is a big item they need that they don't receive (or if they maybe didn't register for them out of preference - - like a pump). Maybe get a small gift to open in conjunction with a gift card??

stephweinstein · January 2013

mrshall10210:
It's not a lot of fun, but maybe just get her a gift card? You could get one of the small things and a nice card to put with it. Surely there'll be something she didn't get that she could put the money towards.

This. I would prefer a gift card from the store where I registered. IMHO, if I were the recipient and I wanted what you're thinking of buying I would have registered for it. At the very least buy the thing you think may be helpful but get it from the store she registered from so she can return it with ease.

526SadieSadie · January 2013

You could do small, random things in a basket or maybe a gift certificate for a prenatal massage? I got one at my shower and it was pretty fantastic.

If you had a little more time I'd say go look on Etsy and have something made but that won't work if the shower is this weekend.

tilsonc · January 2013

Buy size 1 diapers and wipes. I loved getting diapers and wipes at my shower!!

Happy2BPregnant · January 2013

mrshall10210:
It's not a lot of fun, but maybe just get her a gift card? You could get one of the small things and a nice card to put with it. Surely there'll be something she didn't get that she could put the money towards.

This!

Or, is there someone you could go in with to buy a bigger item?

kellyrn9956 · January 2013

I personally would prefer the small things off my registry. I registered for them for a reason and would much prefer that to an outfit. One of my favorite shower gifts to give is a basket of small but wanted items. Although gift cards are great for the recipient you very rarely see them given at showers.

CloudBee · January 2013

kellyrn9956:
I personally would prefer the small things off my registry. I registered for them for a reason and would much prefer that to an outfit. One of my favorite shower gifts to give is a basket of small but wanted items. Although gift cards are great for the recipient you very rarely see them given at showers.

Agreed. She spent time picking out and/or researching all of those small items. I loved receiving a bunch of the small items from my registry at my bridal shower.

shoptilyoudrop · January 2013

Since you've already "been there, done that", you have great experience with what baby needs! I know that I used and loved some of the off registry items people got me based on their own experience. It was mostly stuff I never even heard of! So I say go for it and give her something that you found indispensable. It's way more personal than a gift card, and she'll always remember you for it.

CNJ4EVA · January 2013

I agree with PP about the gift card idea, I think it's the best way to go. Also, maybe pick up a cute outfit or two so the guests still have something to oooh and aaah over.

bananers · January 2013

Spacebunny19:
I would, if I was the recipient, prefer the random little things on the registry vs. something not on there, no matter how much the giver found it was useful. It's possible she didn't register for it for a reason (has it, doesn't like whatever it is, etc.) and here there are items left on the registry, so if you don't get those items, odds are she'll spend the $ to go get them herself.
My suggestion would be to get a cute basket or other container, and fill it with those random little things. I know I'd love something like that.

This, word for word. I haven't had my baby shower yet, but I remember one of my favorite bridal shower gifts was a cute basket with all kinds of small odds and ends from our registry in it.

I guess it would also depend on the MTB. While it's true that some FTMs are clueless, others put a lot of thought and research into every last item on their registry, and any help fulfilling those items is much appreciated!

Lndzy13 · January 2013

Spacebunny19:
I would, if I was the recipient, prefer the random little things on the registry vs. something not on there, no matter how much the giver found it was useful. It's possible she didn't register for it for a reason (has it, doesn't like whatever it is, etc.) and here there are items left on the registry, so if you don't get those items, odds are she'll spend the $ to go get them herself.
My suggestion would be to get a cute basket or other container, and fill it with those random little things. I know I'd love something like that.

Ditto this exactly, as I'm looking at my registry right now and the majority of things are left on it, and my final shower is in 2 hours. =( We put things on the registry because those are the items we wanted- even small things like toy rings and swaddle blankets.

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