Lurker Question

MaybeMommies · January 2013

Hi, all. I have been a lurker for quite some time now. I've never posted because I'm currently not in the adoption process at all. However, a situation recently came up and I figured what better place to get some information/advice than from you ladies. So, here goes...My best friend's father and stepmother are currently in the process of adopting a sibset of two somehow related to the stepmother, from foster care. They were asked a few months ago to consider also adopting the bio mom's next child who is due in a few weeks. They agreed and everything was set and ready to go. However, they recently decided that taking on a third baby would be too much and have changed their minds. They haven't informed the case worker so another family hasn't been found no other family is willing to take new baby either. I'm sure you can see where this is going. What would it take for me to be considered a possible placement for this baby? Would a "referral" of sorts from my friend's family have any bearing at all? I know this is a long shot considering I am no where near approved for fostertoadopt, we're all from a different state than the birth mom, and I'm single and not even close to be related!. I just hate the thought of this baby girl not growing up knowing her siblings or them knowing her my friend's stepmom has no intention of telling the older two they have a sibling if a stranger adopts her. So what are your thoughts? Any chance at all at rushing me through the homestudy, etc and being considered before other unrelated waiting families or a complete waste of time? Yes, I know I sound crazy : Also, forgive formatting. I'm mobile.

bongii · January 2013

i would contact the agency and talk with a case worker. they might be interested in keeping the siblings close so it could work in your favor? and if not then at least you know.

[Deleted User] · January 2013

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MaybeMommies · January 2013

Bio mom signed away her rights for her oldest and TPR was signed a few months ago on the second. The state is immediately taking this next with no plan to reunify. As far as crossing state lines, I am in the same state as my friend's parents just on a different county. I would love to adopt the new baby but I'm not as educated on the laws and whatnot. I didn't know if I could be put at the top of the list since there would be a relationship with the siblings.

IRR · January 2013

ashb15:
Bio mom signed away her rights for her oldest and TPR was signed a few months ago on the second. The state is immediately taking this next with no plan to reunify. As far as crossing state lines, I am in the same state as my friend's parents just on a different county. I would love to adopt the new baby but I'm not as educated on the laws and whatnot. I didn't know if I could be put at the top of the list since there would be a relationship with the siblings.

There really is NO list if the bio mom agrees she wants to place with you. Also you do need t get your homestudy completed before any placement could happen. I would talk to the agency and see what it would take to make that happen. When is she due? Perhaps the parents taking the other two would take the third short term if your HS hasn't been completed. GL.

Foster1Mom · January 2013

I do not know that as CW would even speak with you about it. The unborn child is not in care and confidentiality. I would see if the couple that has the siblings could mention the possibility to the CW and see if they are receptive and what steps you would need to take. Good Luck

MaybeMommies · January 2013

I know it's a long shot but it makes me feel better that you guys didn't tell I was nuts for even thinking it was a possibility : Btw, bio mom will never consent. Although, she won't really even be given the option. They're not sure exactly when she is due but they're guessing beginning of Feb.

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