Late Term and Child Loss

another update and i am broken

So a little while ago i posted that i was pregnant again after loosing my 15 mo old son connor and how i was terrified something would happen to this baby...well it did. I lost the baby. I went in for the first sonogram and there was no heartbeat. I was 10.5 weeks. I am still going through the miscarriage now. I had to take medication to induce the miscarriage. I am completely broken. I have lost two children in 4 months. First my beautiful son connor dies in his sleep at almost 15 mo old and then my rainbow baby..my hope that life would get better dies before we could meet. I have spiralled down my grief and am starting all over i feel. I just dont know how to move on from this. I wonder how much more i can take. I cry all the time and i miss my connor more every waking moment. He is my most perfect angel but id give anything to have him back...id give up any future children just to have him back. But i cant so we wanted to have more children and lost that baby too. My son brayden is my only salvation.

Holly
Mommy to brayden,4 and connor 6/2/118/29/12

Re: another update and i am broken

  • Im sorry for your losses. This is a good place for comfort as we all have been or are where you are. My heart goes out to you and your family.
    Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers Daisypath Anniversary tickers image Me - 41 DH - 28 **** Proud mom to Christopher, dob 7/15/92 **** Nathaniel dob 1/18/05 -1/18/05 (8 mos) in heaven **** bfp 8/26/10 m/c 10/14/10 at 7 wks. **** D&C 10/15/10 **** Cycles 1-4 BFN's **** Cycle #5 - 100 mg Clomid **** IUI #1 - 04/23/11 and 4/24/11 - 5/8/11 IUI #1 = BFFN BFP 10/14/11 - EDD 6/22/12** Stick little one Stick! Athena Jane 5/31/12 - 8/28/12
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  • I am also very sorry for your losses. Please continue to be gentle with yourself and your family. Lean into them for support. Lots of T & Ps your way.
    Lilypie - (qptF)


    Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers 
    "Elsie Irene was born sleeping at 35w 6d on December 8, 2012. Mommy and Daddy miss you sweet girl."


  • I'm so sorry for your losses.  My son was 36 days old when he became an angel in his sleep.  All of your feelings are completely rational.  I remember sitting in the ER when they were trying to bring him back and telling God to take me, take DH, take my dog or anyone else but bring him back. 

    Wishing you peace and love.

     

    In memory of Corbin Scott 10/28/11-12/3/11. Heaven got another angel the night you left this world behind Heaven got a little better the day it took you away from me Missing you tonight, see you again sometime For now I'll close my eyes and dream of heaven tonight I'll love you forever I'll like you for always Now and Forever My baby you'll be

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    corbinsmommy.blogspot.com


     

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  • I am so very sorry for both of you losses. Please feel free to come here and find comfort among women who understand your pain.

    ((HUGS))

    BFP #1 12.24.07 - DD born @ 39w1d on 08.26.08
    BFP #2 08.04.11 - DD born still @ 37w3d on 03.25.12

    Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers

    --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

    TTC #3 since May 2012

    BFP #3 12.29.12 - CP @ 4w2d on 01.02.13
    BFP #4 10.17.13 - CP @ 4w2d on 10.23.13

    BFP #5 04.06.14 - MMC 05.07.14

    No longer trying to conceive.

    image    http://oi40.tinypic.com/15czrid.jpg     image

  • I am so sorry that you are going through another loss and for the loss of your sweet boy, Connor.  We are all here for you.  ((hugs))
    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker

     Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers

    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker

    BFP#1 - 11/27/09 EDD 8/5/10, DS1 arrived 7/24/10 via emergency c-section.

    BFP#2 - 6/18/12 EDD 2/23/13, sweet baby girl born sleeping on 10/4/12 at 19 weeks, 3 days.

    BFP #3 - 1/18/13 EDD 10/1/13, natural mc on 2/2/13 at 5 weeks, 4 days.

    BFP #4 - 8/29/13 EDD 5/12/14, our sweet rainbow, DS2 born 4/29/14 via c-section

  • I'm so sorry for your losses.  It's just so unfair.
    Mom to Eliott Alexander, born sleeping at 37 weeks on 8/13/10. Most of us only dream of angels - I held one in my arms.
    BFP #2 - EDD 2/26/12 M/C 6/28/11 @ 5w2d
    BFP #3 - EDD 4/7/12 M/C 8/2/11 @ 4w2d
    Too beautiful for this earth
    BFP #4 - EDD 12/09/12, Lucille arrived 11/26/12
  • Holly,

    I am so sorry you are suffering so much right now, and I am deeply sorry for your losses.

    I recently had a miscarriage after loosing my daughter (she was stillborn) and it brought back all the emotions I felt right after her loss.  It made me want her back even more.  

    Please know we are all here for you to offer support in any way possible.   

    Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers 

    BFP #1 Jan. 2011 - mmc Mar. 2011 
    BFP #2 Aug. 2011 - My sleeping angel Stella, born April 21, 2012 
    BFP #3 Nov. 2012 - mmc Dec. 2012
    BFP #4 April 2013 - mc May 2013
    BFP #5 Sept. 2013 - EDD 5.24.14
  • I'm so sorry for your losses Holly. I wish I had more words of comfort or could give you a hug right now. As the others said, we are here to offer as much support as we can. You and your family are in my thoughts. *hugs*
    ________________________________________________________________________________


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  • I'm so sorry for your losses. ((hugs)) I wish I could say something that would make you feel better..there are just no words. Please just know that you are not alone and we'll be here for you anytime you need to talk.

    Jillian Rose- born 8/26/12 at 24 weeks. "It broke my heart to lose you but you didn't go alone, for a part of me went with you, the day God took you home"
    I love you always, my beautiful girl.

    Hysteroscopy 3/1/13 Dx: Unicornuate uterus

    || <a href="http://www.fertilityfriend.com" style="font-size:smaller;" >Ovulation TrackeMy Ovulation Chart

    BFP 3/18/13- Please be our Rainbow, we love you so much already.

    6/4/13-Found out we're having a BOY!!

    10/30/13-He's here!! Happy Birthday, Ryan! We love you so much! xo

    Lilypie - (Bfmg)

     

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