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April 2012 Moms
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NBR, "thank you" card etiquette

MegSowersMegSowers member
in April 2012 Moms

I need the "norm." Growing up I always had to write thank you cards anytime I received a gift, money, etc on any occasion. So fast forward- now married, baby, etc. I have still continued to write thank you cards for anything for me, us, baby. This Xmas it occurred to me that I get very few thank you's in return (not the point; I don't care), but it made me think what the norm is. Growing up I lived far from my extended family, so I could never say thank you in person. But I've continued to write cards even if I do say thank you in person, too. This Xmas I was able to pretty much say thank you to everyone in person. I decided not to write thank yous. DH never wrote thank yous for Xmas or Bdays, unless something was sent to him that he couldn't say thank you to in person. Ok enough rambling...

What is the etiquette? Do you send a thank you even if you thanked them in person? 

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Re: NBR, "thank you" card etiquette

  • sharrison88sharrison88
    For birthdays and Christmas, we don't normally do thank you cards. I never have. If we have out of town family who give gifts, we always called them to thank them. I'm thinking for LOs first birthday, which will be a bigger "organized" event, I will probably write thank you's.
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  • schmoodschmood member

    With my family (immediate and extended), we pretty much always send thank you notes, even though we see each other frequently and have the opportunity to say it in person.

    With DH's family, they rarely send thank yous. 

    I'm in the midwest, if that matters. 

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  • KatFCoKatFCo member

    I grew up doing thank you cards for major things--like showers or wedding gifts. Birthday and Christmas the people were thanked in person.

    With DD, I wanted her to start doing thank you cards for out of town family gifts and DH said his family would think it was strange. I want her to learn to do them, but i need to get more into the practice.

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  • SteelCity44SteelCity44 member

    I also grew up writing thank you cards. We weren't allowed the spend the money/play with the toy/wear the outfit until the thank you card was in the mail. But that was because the gift was mailed to us. We've never written them for gifts given in person. My SIL writes thank you cards from the kids for every.single.occasion. I feel like it's a nice gesture, but not always necessary when you see the person when they deliver the gift.

    I'm glad you mentioned this, because I've had a couple of music programs in the last week, and I need to write thank you cards to all of the teachers that helped out! My principal has on multiple occasions told me that I don't need to write her a card for every single program, but I told her that my mom wouldn't approve of that statement. Granite, no one ever writes me a thank you card for giving up half of my free time to organize and put on the performance.

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  • jcsntms06jcsntms06 member
    For baby, bridal, birthday's, and when family give $ just randomly I send out a written thank you, but I don't do that when it's for Christmas (because normally I see them and I just tell them thank you). My hubby has never written a thank you card (he probably doesn't even know they exist!).
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  • mkwtmkwt member
    Oh this is one of my pet peeves.......I was raised that if someone spent their hard earned time and money to get you a gift the least you could do is send them a quick thank you card.  I send out thank you cards for everything execpt Christmas or birthday, but I usually tell the people in person anyway.  One thing that really gets my goat is when you send me a facebook message as a thank you, really??? really???  I do not find that acceptable. My mother in law says she is okay with facebook thank you, she says why send a card, I am just going to throw it away after I read it, save the money.   Totally disagree, it is a respect thing for me,  my DD will be raised the way I was and she will send out thank you cards.
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