Restaurant Success (and our lack thereof)

LER091811 · January 2013

For the first 6 months or so, instead of ever going out to restaurants with other couples we would just go to each other's homes for dinner to avoid this issue. But my husband and I *do* like going out to eat about every other week on a weekend night so we've been trying to do this now that my daughter is a bit more aware.

However, her restaurant etiquette is like the worst behavior she can create. She hates staying in the small area around the table, gets bored, and then by the time our food comes will literally be screaming at the top of her lungs. She rejects her toys, even really exciting toys she rarely sees, and just screams. I nurse her but she doesn't fall asleep or relax for much more than a few minutes.

Anyone have any tips on "training" your baby to tolerate restaurants better? I know the books I have read on French parenting say that toddlers can tolerate restaurants with the right training but I'm not sure what I can do to get my daughter used to it. Any toy ideas or anything you've done that works?

jennyelf · January 2013

Our LO (now 8months) went to a ton of restaurants over Christmas holidays as we were traveling, and he did really well. I think what helped is that he's been sitting in a high chair with us at dinner since he was about 3 months old so he's kinda used to the routine of being put in a chair and having to sit there while we eat. Once he hit 6 months, we started giving him food too (we're doing BLW) and that helps as it occupies him for a while as he plays with it or eats it. Also, while we're waiting for our food, we typically hold him and interact with him so as to reduce the amount of time he's just sitting in a chair.

So perhaps sit her in a high chair at home during meals. Give her some food to eat and play with as well, and put her in the high chair once food arrives, giving her attention and out of chair time beforehand.

mben1119 · January 2013

DS loves to go out to eat. Some things that we do that make it successful are:
-Go early in the day. Anything after 5ish, and it is meltdown city.
-Make sure LO is hungry. That way, they can eat off of your plate and be entertained throughout by eating.
-Go for walks periodically. A change of scenery does wonders.

danslilgrizzly · January 2013

L, I know F isn't crazy about food just yet, but we do a lot of what the other posters have said. Make sure to go out with people who adore her

. A lot of the time Abel is content being passed around and getting to spend some time with each person at the table. If we are going to dinner I will bring his purees and also let him eat from our plates, drink water from our glasses etc. I'm sure she'll get used to it after awhile.

khill86 · January 2013

I do the same as PPs. I have DS on my lap until the food comes. Then he goes in a high chair. We do BLW, too, so I give him some food off my plate and all is well. It's pretty much the same way we handle meal time at home, so other than all the exciting things happening around us, it's not much different than any other meal.

cmurphy09 · January 2013

jennyelf:
Our LO now 8months went to a ton of restaurants over Christmas holidays as we were traveling, and he did really well. I think what helped is that he's been sitting in a high chair with us at dinner since he was about 3 months old so he's kinda used to the routine of being put in a chair and having to sit there while we eat. Once he hit 6 months, we started giving him food too we're doing BLW and that helps as it occupies him for a while as he plays with it or eats it. Also, while we're waiting for our food, we typically hold him and interact with him so as to reduce the amount of time he's just sitting in a chair.nbsp;So perhaps sit her in a high chair at home during meals.nbsp; Give her some food to eat and play with as well, and put her in the high chair once food arrives, giving her attention and out of chair time beforehand.

This. However I think it is going to be more difficult for you guys since this is a new inconsistent experience your LO isn't accustom too.

It sounds like she's over stimulated too. So maybe 'less' is more, try to configure a way to make the situation comfortable for your lo, instead of brining in more new things in an already seemingly overwhelming circumstance. I put keep DD in her stroller, with toys she's familiar with, have some solids for her as well as a bottle. GL

kpearse99 · January 2013

jennyelf:

Our LO (now 8months) went to a ton of restaurants over Christmas holidays as we were traveling, and he did really well. I think what helped is that he's been sitting in a high chair with us at dinner since he was about 3 months old so he's kinda used to the routine of being put in a chair and having to sit there while we eat. Once he hit 6 months, we started giving him food too (we're doing BLW) and that helps as it occupies him for a while as he plays with it or eats it. Also, while we're waiting for our food, we typically hold him and interact with him so as to reduce the amount of time he's just sitting in a chair.

So perhaps sit her in a high chair at home during meals. Give her some food to eat and play with as well, and put her in the high chair once food arrives, giving her attention and out of chair time beforehand.

This!! As soon as he started eating solids, at 4.5 months, he's been sitting in his high chair for every meal. We recently started taking him to restaurants and he's been doing amazingly!!! We also try to plan it around his dinner time, 5:30, so that he can eat too with us, which occupies him pretty well!!

DavidStamps · January 2013

You should definitely turn your dining room/kitchen into a restaurant and start practicing etiquette at home. If he doesn't have to be quiet or calm at home during dinner he won't know what that means when you are out in public. Make a habit or setting an example at home and I'm sure it will rub off when you are out and about.

telyn · January 2013

Except for some hardcore flirting, LO is great going out to eat-now.

At 3 mo, she was a terror the one time I tried with her- unless she was nursing under a cover, she was screaming. So I started eating meals with one hand holding her. That was a bad plan.

We started small. LO had been coming to the table nearly every night since birth, but she was really just sitting in my lap or with hubby so I could wolf a few mouthfuls. So, we started small. I put her in a front-facing carrier while I ate on a stool. If she started to fuss, I would bounce a little and then offer her a toy or a carrot or something to play with, if she reached for my plate I would say "say please" then pause and give her a piece of what she wanted, say "say thank you" (then watched her like a hawk because she wasn't eating solids yet). Then, as she got to be a sitter, I put her in her highchair for a few minutes at every dinner with something interesting for her on the surface- pureed food mainly, which at that point was more like finger paint, but what ever. Then the whole meal in the high chair- now she wanted to eat the food, so in addition to feeding her purees, I would sometimes give her pieces of our meal large enough to suck or gnaw on, but not large enough to swallow.

When she got good at sitting for the whole dinner, we started going out for Sunday lunches- sometimes we would walk around when she started getting fussy, but we tried to continue the dinner at home vibe- very low key, but sitting the whole time. We went to places that weren't slammed with people, we tried to sit outside if the weather was nice because A) fewer people sit outside the tables tend to be further apart outside C) noise doesn't carry as well outside and D) dropped food is easy to clean outside.

If she went into full fuss, we would leave. We would cancel our order, or ask them to box it up to go if we had already gotten our food.

Last night we went to our first dinner- it was Tuesday, so not a whole lot of people. I nursed her a little before we left, so she wouldn't be starving. I gave her a roll to play with while we waited for our food, gave her some of my sweet potato (which she more or less mushed around on her plate) Fed her a few mouthfuls of the potato and gave her some pieces of steak (which she doesn't eat, but sucks on). She even tried some of hubby's Caesar salad! She got a little loud trying to get stranger's attention and she got a little messy trying to feed herself, but we cleaned up the table before we left, gave the waiter a generous tip and it was great! We'll do sporadic dinners like this for a while before we try a Friday/Saturday night place and we'll wait a bit before trying anything "fancy" but this low key strategy is working for us.

Again, it went slowly. We didn't try to barrel on if she was really bad- we would just leave and try again later. It's easier now but I don't know if that's just because she is better with people now or if it's because she likes to eat now. Our LO really just likes to be doing whatever you are doing. When we read, she wants to try to hold the book. If we are walking somewhere, she wants to get down and walk. She can't do these things yet and it frustrates her to no end, but we let her try to do as much as she can by herself and assist her to do the rest, and that goes for eating in a restaurant. She sits at the table just like us, "eats" the same food as us and it seems to be better for her.

Now if I could only get her to drink through a straw! She sees our cups and her sippy cup and KNOWS it's different so will bang her cup on her highchair until we let her "drink" from our cups. She needs a poncho for this! She can do the bottom of the straw, but not the top. And once you give her a drink from the bottom of the straw, it becomes a game and she doesn't want to stop until shes spitting up water.

Want a personalized experience?

Restaurant Success (and our lack thereof)

Re: Restaurant Success (and our lack thereof)

Choose Another Board

Search Boards