XP: What made you decide to go natural?

CaraLynn91 · January 2013

Why did you decide this way?

I had an epidural with my DD because I was mainly scared of going into labor. I ended up having some back issues after she was born, which may have been coincidental. I just didn't want to risk it again. Also, I just want to know I can do it. My body IS made for this after all.

The only reason I ask what made you decide going natural because SO is kind of apprehensive about my decision. I'm not sure if it's just to fact of knowing he will see me in so much pain especially compared to last time, or what. I want to be able to comfort him, and maybe even show him some facts of why it could be more beneficial to not have an epidural.

tokenhoser · January 2013

I was more worried about a cascade of interventions (epidural slows labour, which leads to pitocin, which leads to a baby that is tolerating contractions badly, which leads to c-section) than about the pain. I've also heard too many stories of epidural complications, like spinal headaches or it not working fully anyway. For me, it made sense to go into it attempting med free and only add interventions if the situation warranted it. I had a great med-free birth and plan to do it again.

"The Business of Being Born" is the usual way women convince their SO.

JuneBug86 · January 2013

I didn't start off wanting a natural birth. In fact, at my first prenatal appointment I told my doctor that I wanted an epidural and whatnot. I was sure that I didn't want to feel that pain. I was actually really nervous about the birth experience and I knew I wanted that epi no matter what!

Then about half way through my pregnancy my whole perspective on all of that changed. I don't know exactly why, probably a combination of things. I just knew I wanted to go through labor without an epi and I wanted to do it on my own, and just do what felt right in the moment.

I had a pretty quick labor. It started on its own 4 days before my due date. It ended with vacuum assist because the cord was wrapped around DS's neck twice and again around the shoulders. I pushed for 2.5 hours and he didn't come out at all, and then we realized why once the vacuum pulled him out. My OB called it the "bungie cord effect". The cord had him tied into me.

I did it without an epi and it really wasn't that bad. It wasn't near as bad as I thought it would be. Of course it was painful, but it wasn't like "OMG, I want to die!" kind of painful. I have no fears doing it again.

beany02 · January 2013

I had never really thought too much about childbirth until i got pregnant with DD. About half way through my pregnancy, my gut instinct told me that there is something strange and unnatural about injecting something into your spine....I just think it cant be good for you. My body was made to birth a baby, so I wanted to birth my baby the way nature intended. I wanted the full experience, with no interference from doctors who treat childbirth like a medical condition that needs to be managed and controlled. I felt very protective of my body, my baby, and my birth experience. I didnt want some "stranger" (nurses, doctors, etc) involving themselves in me and DH's personal experience. I did have DD in a hospital with no drugs, but i had a bad experience with my episiotomy and I will be having our next baby at a birthing center. The only reason I didnt do a birth center with DD is because of pressure from family ("what if something goes wrong!??" etc etc etc)

When i first told family and friends that i planned on a natural birth, they all acted like i was crazy for not wanting an epidural.....that really bugged me. Injecting something into your spinal column is what's crazy! It's kinda sad how skewed our views are in today's world. There is NOTHING crazy about having a baby naturally!

aylafsu88 · January 2013

Honestly, I choose to go natural becuase I am afraid of needles so an epi scared the crap out of me. I am terrified of a c-section even more. When I was reading up on L&D I realized that induction and epis often lead to failure to progress which can lead to a c-section. Based on this info I decided that natural was the best way to go to avoid unnecessary interventions. I have a moderate tolerance for pain in general, so I prepared with Bradley classes and hired a doula. My L&D went great and it was not nearly as bad (painful) as I thought it would be!

KateLouise · January 2013

My initial reasons for wanting to go natural were I was scared of needles, I never take pain meds for headaches and stuff so it's not how I deal with pain, and I believed that my body could handle it.

It was later reading that made me want a natural birth to avoid other possible interventions, and to optimise bonding after birth/BF, and my own recovery.

FWIW I've had 2 beautiful natural births. Hard work? sure, but by no means too much to handle, and recovery afterwards was a breeze. I know a lot of that was purely good luck, but I think if you know why you want to avoid medication then it makes it easier to stick to that during labour.

horsevaulter · January 2013

I just want to be in as much control of the situation as possible. I feel like it is such a private thing to be completely exposed to the world I dont want some weird guy Dr all up in my parts making decisions for me. And the thought of being paralyzed from the waist down is terrifying to me. I want to be able to walk around and choose the best way that works for me to give birth by listening to my body. How can you listen to your body if you cant even feel it?

HK2mom4 · January 2013

After my first experience with all the medical intervention I had I did not want a repeat with all my other births! So ?

First and foremost be totally honest with yourself! Know your own body and its limitations! Then adhere to ?

Your attitude, yes attitude, that?s right attitude is an extremely important assets which you must have if you really; truly believe then want a tremendously successful outcome! You must believe whole heartily in the ability of your body to carry you on, the heart to back you up, a mind that controls all the pain and your own soul to follow through to that successful conclusion you so want! That all this is in your best interest! And that you can handle this (on your own) without so called interventions that will make it all come together - then making it all happen for you!

This does not only apply to child birth but, to a good life in general ?

clariknittist · January 2013

I'm going to let it rip, because I have really had to bite my tongue with lots of DH's family who even AFTER THE FACT have an opinion about me going med-free. (Why?! You asked, I told you what happened, you're still giving me crap?!?!) First of all, I did not want anything getting into my baby's little system. I know epidurals are considered "safe," but I just don't care. It doesn't feel safe to me - just check out the possible side effects... Secondly, my mom did it for me and for my brothers. I felt like I owed it to her in a way. I didn't want the cascade of events ultimately ending in a c-section for lots of reasons - I didn't want to be recovering from major surgery while learning to be a mother, among other things. I wanted to experience the whole thing, and I cannot describe the moment I felt him actually being born - the greatest moment of my life, by far. I wanted to know I was giving him the best start possible, and that includes the best odds at breastfeeding. And selfishly, I wanted to do it for myself - I wanted to rise to the challenge, and to smack everyone in the face who ever said "Just wait, you'll be begging for the drugs" - screw you, you do not know what I can handle!! I will admit, I was so touched my husband was out bragging about it to people the next day - I loved feeling like he was proud of me, and he's often said since then he feels like the baby is so healthy because of what I chose with our birth. I know there's a fair amount that was out of my hands and just dumb luck/being blessed/however you want to look at it, but I can't tell you how much it means to hear him say that. For your sake, I hope your SO gets fully on board - I can tell you, it makes all the difference in the world!

briannabeebug · January 2013

Not to sound like a snot and not saying this is right for everyone, but I think if I want to make a kid I should be fully present and actively participating in it's birth. I want to join the ranks of every single woman that has experienced the high of bringing her baby into the world.

I do not want a doctor telling me what do to with my body. I do not want to be pressured into sh!t that literally has not been around long enough to see the long term effects.

I am a healthy woman and there is no foreseeable reason at this point *not* to have a natural birth other than fear of pain. And ladies, my own fear is not a valid reason for me to put my child at risk.

mrshall10210 · January 2013

At first, I was really just thinking how terrified I was of the epidural. I'm scared of needles, and the thought of having one in my spine was unbearable. So I started thinking, I can just do it without the epidural. I didn't really know what natural birth actually meant until I ventured onto this message board and I started reading other womens' stories about natural birth and the downsides of all the common interventions, more than just epidurals. I started reading some more online and bought some books on the subject, and I have really come to learn that a natural childbirth is really the safest and healthiest thing for myself and my child, if at all possible.

I think the reason that most people don't agree is because they are uneducated about it and probably, like I used to, think it's silly to turn down pain medication and assume that because your doctor offers an intervention, that it is certainly necessary. If your SO feels this way, I would ask him to do some reading on his own. Hopefully he will begin to understand why you want to go natural! He is just concerned for you and your LO.

Right now, I'm reading The Thinking Woman's Guide to a Better Birth, by Henci Goer. It's definitely biased towards natural birth, but explains a lot about the different interventions. There are several different books on Amazon, I don't know if there are any written for SO's in particular.

mandy522 · January 2013

I read Henci Goer's "The Thinking Woman's Guide to a Better Birth." She can be kind of militant about natural birth, and I'm really not, but I am a huge advocate of understanding what is happening to my body and making my own medical decisions. The stats on epidurals in particular and interventions in general are really eye opening. Personally, I think being educated about birth and making your own decisions is more important than whether or not you actually go natural, but I also think you may be surprised at what you can handle when you're educated about what is happening to your body and how to trust your body to do what its meant to do.

My DH was very nervous about natural birth, but we talked a lot about what I learned (I did all the reading, and reported back to him ), and I convinced him to take a natural birth class. (The hospital classes are worthless). He ended up completely on board, and he was an incredible birthing coach. I couldn't have done it without him. They can be convinced!!

stahlop · January 2013

My friend posted about her natural water birth a few years ago. She also posted a link to The Business of Being Born. I though that if she could do a natural birth I could do a natural birth. Plus, after watching BBB I really didn't want drugs.

vintagejjane · January 2013

At first I wanted a natural birth because I hate needles. But the more I researched, the more I felt it was important to me physically for recovery, and being at home was the icing on the cake.

luvmyducks · January 2013

I didn't want a c-section (ETA: which I knew interventions could lead to) and I didn't want my baby effected by any sort of pain meds I was given. I also do not like the idea of being numb--freaks me out. So that pretty much put me towards the path of med-free birth.

jennyelf · January 2013

A number of reasons:

1) I really wanted to avoid a c-section and have a faster recovery and I was worried about cascading interventions.

2) I'd had a spinal tap in my early twenties and never wanted to experience anything like it EVER again. While an epidural probably wouldn't have had the same headache after, the thought of a needle in my back like that again just freaked me out.

3) I know I am pretty strong and I'm in good shape. I was biking up to 100 miles a week before I got pregnant and continued biking until week 38. Figured if I could do all of that, then I should see how I do with labor before assuming I'd need pain relief.

4) Breastfeeding was also important to me, so figured chances were better w/o any meds in my system.

In the end, I did make it through. About 2 hours before I delivered, I finally was admitted to the hospital and I wasn't sure if I was going to make it. After the initial monitoring, I was at 8-9 cm so by that point it was pretty much too late. I was really amazed at what my body was able to do and how well I was able to handle it. I had 29 hours of labor and 12 minutes of pushing.

As for my husband, he did have trouble seeing me in pain, but he was there for me every step. We also had a doula, and things got a lot better once I was admitted to the hospital. We felt better and knew that we were where we were supposed to be and that the baby would be fine.

sthomas1222 · January 2013

My main, initial reason was labor is supposed to be painful. Your body is going through massive changes and I don't think that it needs to be interfered with. Like you said, my body is MADE for this. I also want to avoid a C/S and the best way to do that is to have minimal to no interventions including an epidural. Then when we did our Bradley class and we learned about the hormonal cascade and all the benefits to a drug-free birth then I was 100% reassured that I was planning what was best for me and baby.

sthomas1222 · January 2013

clariknittist:
And selfishly, I wanted to do it for myself - I wanted to rise to the challenge, and to smack everyone in the face who ever said "Just wait, you'll be begging for the drugs" - screw you, you do not know what I can handle!!

OH OH and this! My mom is all like "you don't have any kind of pain tolerance". Uhm no, I just know from my RN education that being in pain unnecessarily can impede the healing process. I don't see labor as unnecessary pain, it's natural. Also, I want to beat the crap out of the next mom who says "you'll be begging for drugs", especially the strangers. Who the F are you? You don't know me!

madameashley · January 2013

I have always been up in the air about receiving an epidural. The reason is because I trust my own body to do what it needs to do while giving birth. We were definitely made to deliver children and I, personally, have just never been comfortable with taking anything that will mess up that natural process. I feel the same about birth control, but I know birth control is DEFinitely needed after LO arrives!

mlrafiki · January 2013

Four years ago, one of my friends gave birth to her first child, and I was surprised to hear she'd had a C-section. Since I had not heard any of the statistics regarding CS, I assumed at the time that this was ONLY done in the case of serious, immediate life-or-death danger to the mother or child. But when I asked why the CS, she said "Well, I was in labor for 30 hours and they didn't like the baby's heart rate."

I was completely baffled. I mean, I'm no doctor, but I know my own mother was in labor for 22 hours and that it's not unusual for it to go much longer. I found The Business of Being Born on Netflix and was completely HORRIFIED. I had NO idea that interventions had become so common in birth.... I just assumed most women gave birth the way they have for centuries, because that's what our bodies are designed for. We weren't ready for kids at the time, though, so I chalked the film up to hysterical propaganda and went on with my life.

I became pregnant this year, and started asking members of my family about their own births.... that's how I found out that my mom was terrified (her word) at my birth because her water had broken first, and she'd been told to come straight to the hospital, where she'd been stuck in an uncomfortable bed in a tiny room until she cried for the drugs. And then I learned that my grandmother was "knocked out" for my dad's birth, because "that's how they did things back then." How frightening must that have been?!

Point is, I was convinced not by the uplifting stories of beautiful natural births, but by the horror stories of unnatural birth practices of the last century. DH and I went to meet some doulas last week, and he said as we were leaving "Wow, I didn't realize you had so much anxiety about birth." Yeah.

I'm going natural because I'm convinced it's the safer option. Granted, I have a doctor I trust who understands my preferences, so I will be pretty open to any recommendations she makes, and won't refuse an intervention if there's a strong case for it (which is why I'm doing my own research as to what constitutes a legit reason for interventions.... just to make sure I recognize the terminology).

Good luck convincing your SO! I think having a good doula will be the best thing, because she can reassure him if something scares him during the birth.

kxp004 · January 2013

aylafsu88:
Honestly, I choose to go natural becuase I am afraid of needles so an epi scared the crap out of me. I am terrified of a c-section even more. When I was reading up on L&D I realized that induction and epis often lead to failure to progress which can lead to a c-section. Based on this info I decided that natural was the best way to go to avoid unnecessary interventions. I have a moderate tolerance for pain in general, so I prepared with Bradley classes and hired a doula. My L&D went great and it was not nearly as bad (painful) as I thought it would be!

This! I have a needle phobia as well but it is also way more personable with MWs and I think overall better for you and the baby because they treat it like pregnancy is normal not a sickness...

fun fact: ~20% of people avoid healthcare due to a needle phobia...

macdidlyicious · January 2013

Initially I wanted to go natural because I was terrified of a csection and the recovery that comes along with it. I was also a little worried about bonding after a csection and success of breast feeding. Then as I started reading and learning bout birth I wanted it even more. It was important to me to surround myself with people who supported my goal: incredible family practice doc who had two home births of her own, an amazing doula, a husband who after reading and learning felt the same way as I did, and allowing people that supported me (a friend who had two NBs of her own and my sister who also had learned the benefits of NB) to be with us at the birth.

I won't lie it was the hardest thing I've ever done and there were moments at the end that I thought I would split in two but when my DD came out bright eyed and looking around, not crying but calm I was so happy I pushed through it. It was really cool to look up at her and see her looking around right after she was born.

Recovery was awesome. Granted I have nothing to compare it to but I felt great after eating something, taking a shower and getting in comfy clothes. I was ready to go home and we were cleared to a few hours after DD was born but I insisted on seeing a lactation consultant before going home (coming back to my serious desire to nurse).

And I'd be lying if I said doing it naturally wasn't part of me being able to stick it to every person who said I was nuts for not getting the epi, who said I'd change my mind, who said I couldn't do it, etc. my mom was one of the people who said I was nuts and that I'd change my mind. When she came up to the hospital right after DD was born, the first thing I said to her was "I fu@king did it!!". I did and that makes me proud. And awesome.

AimnJus917 · January 2013

briannabeebug:
Not to sound like a snot and not saying this is right for everyone, but I think if I want to make a kid I should be fully present and actively participating in it's birth. I want to join the ranks of every single woman that has experienced the high of bringing her baby into the world.

I do not want a doctor telling me what do to with my body. I do not want to be pressured into sh!t that literally has not been around long enough to see the long term effects.

I am a healthy woman and there is no foreseeable reason at this point *not* to have a natural birth other than fear of pain. And ladies, my own fear is not a valid reason for me to put my child at risk.

All of this came after I did my homework. The original reason was because I was so afraid of labor, pain, birth, all of it. I didn't want to be afraid anymore so I started reading so I understood what happens. And then I felt much better and there was no going back - NB all the way baby! I did it once, and I'll do it again (God-willing no complications arise of course).

Joyfullnoise · January 2013

Ironically, I'm scared of not being in control and not being able to walk seemed more frightening to me than pushing a baby out and feeling it. Thinking about this now even makes me shiver.

Natural childbirth was not as terrible as I thought it would be and it was kind of a weird "high."

Now that I know I did it once; I'm going to do it again.

Want a personalized experience?

XP: What made you decide to go natural?

Re: XP: What made you decide to go natural?

Choose Another Board

Search Boards