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Attachment Parenting
cecilyandgautam
member
Parenting advice from Peds (mini vent)
cecilyandgautam
member
Just had the 1 year check up and our regular Ped is on maternity leave. We saw her sub who was generally good but started getting into parenting advice and I just get so annoyed when people use their position of authority to advise on things outside the scope of their specialty.
The Ped was surprised, and seemed a bit perplexed, that I was still breastfeeding. She said that I should try scheduling feedings so they don't interfere with solids, but I could be more lax about it than most moms because I have a "big" baby. I'm pretty sure breastmilk is still one of the most nutricious foods so I have no problem with her still nursing as much as she wants - and I'm pretty sure the evidence doesn't suggest this is necessary.
She asked if my daughter slept through the night and in her own crib - she does when we feed her a big dinner. Otherwise, she wakes up once between 2-5am and then stays with us for the rest of the morning. The Ped recommended letting her cry for 10 minutes because "she needs her sleep" as if I'm going in there & waking her up at 3am. I'm glad she didn't get into the independent sleeping/co-sleeping debate with me because I really am not up for entertaining such discussions, but pushing a CIO agenda is just really annoying coming from a Dr and what evidence is there that she'll sleep better when she's hungry? Sure, we can be more diligent about feeding her big dinners more often and that would probably get more frequent STTN but she just skipped over that and said she needed to cry.
Ug, annoyed. All I wanted was a weight & height check and the vaccines. Thanks!
This discussion has been closed.
Re: Parenting advice from Peds (mini vent)
Do you read half the posts on this site? Pediatricians are always spouting off this advice. Your baby is eating too often. Your baby should be able to sleep longer. Blah, blah, blah.
Sorry your pedi was being a jerk. This is one of my pet peeves-when a pediatrician gives parenting advice in the guise of medical advice and so many parents listen to the "expert" instead of their own instincts. Obviously your LO is doing just great, so why would you want to change it?
I have only ever asked my pedi one parenting question because he is a parent. I asked how he cuts his kid's nails. He said he hands him over the the grand parents. I appreciated the honesty. LOL!
I agree.
But it's funny, because I just had a fantastic appointment with my pedi who I love and he gave some of the exact opposite advice, and based it on "medicine."
I mentioned we were still breastfeeding in the morning and before bed and he thought it was fantastic. He said there are so many benefits my son is getting, even with just a few feedings and I should keep it up since I'm protecting him from things like this flu that's hitting both coasts.
Sleep came up because my guy has been waking himself up coughing, so we started giving him some albuterol the doctor had prescribed a while ago, I was running it by the doctor and he said that was fine to do if it was helping. I mentioned that sometimes it did, and sometimes he still woke up and I'd nurse him. My doctor said that the extra nursing session at night was a really good idea, that babies let you know when they need it and it was helpful in getting him back to sleep and helping him get better faster.
Your Ped sounds awesome! His advice, like the health benefits of extended breastfeeding actually does sound medical. Whereas, the "schedule it so it doesn't interfere with solids" advice I got just sounded random - is there something special about eating solids after a year? I'm pretty there's not. A friend of mine said he son wasn't gaining weight when he nursed but gained weight on solids - I guess in his case, it makes sense to wean or reduce nursing sessions - but wouldn't that be the exception & not the norm because BM is really calorie dense? Ah, anyway BFing on demand - whether night or day - is working for us (I don't feel overtaxed and my daughter's healthy) so we're sticking with it.
That sounds incredibly frustrating.
We saw a PA for DD's 6 month appointment. She informed me it was time to quit BFing and introduce formula. She threw in a CIO suggestion, as well. I almost lost it on her and have refused to be seen by her ever again.
DD2 8.22.13
MMC 1.4.17 at 16w
Expecting #3, EDD 1.29.18
Our pedi offers parenting advice to us as well but luckily they are very pro-AP. I think they do actually feel its medical advice since its part of the child's mental health to be raised in a certain environment, but I definitely agree that if its not your specialty then you should not be giving advice about it. Not only because it can be annoying for the parents but it could possibly get them into trouble legally. If you aren't asking for advice or if there is not a REAL problem then they have no business telling you how to raise your child, especially if your child isn't normally their patient.