DS is really keeping my on my toes, and is, frankly, driving me up the wall! He'll be 4 in March. We also have a 4 mo DD, and I'm thinking that perhaps this is a delayed stress reaction to having a new baby in the house??
Every.single.time I take my attention off DS, he acts up in some way. Just in the past 48 hrs, he has flooded the bathroom; painted the play room floor with his art supplies; and peed on the play room floor, in his art easel, on his bedroom floor, and on his mattress. (He has been day trained since before age 2, and this peeing-in-novel places is new. I really don't think it's related to a medical issue, either, as he really seems to enjoy doing it.) I SAH and spend pretty much every minute of the day with the kids, actively playing with them or just sitting nearby and observing. I also take time for one-on-one "special time" with both kids- just last night, I left DD with DH and took DS out for ice cream and then to help me pick up some stuff at the store. However, DS commented the other day that I "hate him", and when we sat down and talked about it, he mentioned that he doesn't think I spend enough time with him. Since he's acting up mostly when I'm focusing on the baby (in her room changing her or in my room feeding her before a nap), I suspect that he's truly feeling left out and a little jealous.
How do I deal with this?! I've been trying to stick with Positive Discipline (I'm working my way through my 3rd PD book right now), so for example, here's what happened earlier today and how I handled it:
::I'm nursing DD while DS plays in the adjacent room. I was gone for fewer than 15 min and returned to find pee all over the floor, and DS was laying down newspapers over it.::
Me: (Calmly) What happened in here?
DS: I'm decorating the floor!
Me: And what is that wet stuff there?
Me: This is quite a mess, and you know the proper place to put your pee is in the potty. What do you need to do about this?
DS: Clean it up. (Goes off to get a towel.)
::DS started picking up the soiled newspapers but then lost interest, and I couldn't immediately get him back on track. It was nearly naptime, anyway.::
Me: I see you're not ready to handle this right now. C'mon, let's go lie down. We can deal with this when you wake up.
::I took DS by the hand and led him into his room, then I spritzed some vinegar on the urine and tossed a towel over it (thank goodness it's on a hard floor!), and that's where we are now. DS will have to clean as soon as he wakes up and before he does anything else.::
I'm at a loss. I *feel* like I'm handling these situations well, but I'm going crazy dealing with this several times a day. If it's not pee, it's a huge mess just for the messes sake (it seems) or perhaps a huge tantrum. Any advice?