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Single Parents
ldb1014
member
Intro
ldb1014
member
Hello Ladies!
New to this board. I am about seven weeks preggo and not sure how feel.
I always knew I wanted another baby; DS is 12 and wonderful, now living with EXH. I found out my (now) ex-boyfriend and I are expecting...
We literally broke up a week before I found out, bc he got mad at me bc I was right about something (a huge issue) and told me to "get the "f" out of his apartment at 2 am after I had just been out with the girls...
This has been all about him now. All he says is "me, I, my", all of the self-reflecting pronouns. I told him not to tell anyone and he did...his dad because he was "freaking out, and stressed, and crying." I have not told a sole, nor have I cried yet. He has not asked me how I am feeling, except after his dad told him to.
I asked him to leave me alone, he calls all the time, texts, and even showed up at my home. I just need time to think.
He said he wants to do this 50%, but when I told him how much 50% will cost, he said he can?t do that. He basically lied about what his finances are, and now I guess he is broke. My dad told me that if I move back to Ohio, I can work for him and make over 100k, I can move into my rental home there and only pay 500 a month...oh, and the kicker, I can work from HOME!! Here in Florida, I will have to go back to teaching high school (I could never do my job now with a baby...too much traveling and a ton of hours), so with teaching I would take a 35k pay cut. But he can?t afford to help much, and said he would legally prohibit me from going to Ohio. I have not heard from him about even getting a second job to help. I had to suggest him looking for a better one, and he said no bc he loves his job.
He made some martyr gesture saying how he is selling his racing bikes and looking at his finances, cancelling his gym membership...whatever. I told him I expect him to pay for half of all my pre-baby expenses as well: dr apts., maternity clothes, added grocery expenses, all the little stuff. I am keeping an excel sheet as well.
With my DS, my worked so I could stay home during my 3rd trimester and the first two years. He bought us a house and did what he had to do!! We were 22 and 24! Now my SO is 33 and I am 35, and he 'wishes he could do that, but just can?t...'
I know he wants to give us another try, but I am so livid over him now. I hate him!! I can?t stand him!!
Any advice...I just feel so alone! I have not told my friends that we have broken up or are expecting. My family has never met him, I have never met his (trashy from what I gather) and am pretty much at a cross-road.
This discussion has been closed.
Re: Intro
He can't prevent you from leaving the state. His paternity rights over the child have not been established. You two aren't married, therefore the child is presumed to be yours 100% until a paternity test shows otherwise.
Do you want the coldest, most heartless answer?
Tell your boyfriend that you lost the baby. Move back, take the job with your dad and take care of your child.
Heartless, I know.
It sounds like moving back to Ohio is for the best financially. He can't stop you from moving BEFORE the baby is born. Once the baby is here and he establishes his rights as the father, you will be stuck in Florida.
Do NOT answer the question about your oldest son....it is none of our business....no reason you should have to defend yourself.
Also I would advise against lying to him about losing the baby.
Make a pregnancy ticker
My DS is in boarding school in Ohio. The schools are not very good down here.
I just dont want to move to Ohio and then be forced to move back down here...
I think it is total crap how a majority of financial brunt is on the mother.
I spoke with an attorney today...
I can go to Ohio and he cant force me to move back here...as long as there is not a paternity issue filed yet!
Time to get out of dodge.
I was comparing them, because it shows what a selfish man he is. Comparing them is actually not fair to my exhusband...