We live in Southern California, in a very expensive area, so even though we both work full time and make decent income, we can only afford to rent a small condo. We don't have room for a nursery. We have a small changing table next to our dresser, and we'll get a co-sleeper. We just have to make it work with limited space for the first year or so (we plan to relocate to somewhere cost of living is more reasonable). Anyway, I'm feeling like a bad mom for not having all the furniture and bedding and everything else that seems to be necessities to everyone else. I guess I just feel like the only one not planning, painting and decorating a nursery.
Re: Anyone else NOT having a nursery?
If it makes you feel any better, we had a nursery all set up for DS#1 and we hardly used it. We already had a cosleeper in our room from the get go thinking we would transition to the crib at some point (happened well after a year) and then ended up moving the changing table into our room as well.
After that experience, I cannot imagine spending a lot of time on a nursery. We do have a room designated just for baby but no painting (we are renting a house in Europe) and we are just using our existing neutral baby stuff.
We may not have a nursery for a month or so- our apt is one bed, and we're looking for a house but we'll see. We were thinking we'd do a Moses basket by our bed in the beginning, and we like the changing pad idea, so that will go on the furniture already in our bedroom. Just think- no nursery means less specialized furniture that has no use after a few years ;-)
My bro & sil have two (third on the way) and baby 1 had a mega nursery. Baby 2 has a crib, stepstool and changing pad on a console with drawers.
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I'm another SoCal momma-to-be in a one bedroom. We have very decent floorspace at our place, which is why we're not looking for a new apt right away.
We're lucky that our place has a decent sized walk-in closet off the bedroom. It has a built-in dresser and a small window above that looks out onto the back yard. We're planning on keeping baby in there. It's 2 feet away from my head sleeping at night, but it will be nice to have a quiet place to put baby down for naps.
Anyway, my MIL has not taken the hint that I do not want her old bassinet, changing table and rocking chair (from the east coast, no less) but I'm hoping the cost of shipping will snap her out of it. I think we're planning on getting a mini-crib that converts to a toddler bed, and then just a changing bad that can go on top of the dresser.
Now that we're on the other side of Christmas, nesting has officially begun! Now we just have to figure out where all of our clothes are going...
It's really good to hear that an experienced mom prefers not having a nursery! I agree, I think it'll be nice to have baby close anyway. I would probably be that mom who never used the nursery anyway, now that I really think about it. Just all the posts about furniture and wall colors and themes had me thinking I was doing something wrong. Thanks!
You shouldn't feel like a bad mom. All a baby needs is food, diapers, clothes, a place to sleep, and love. Yeah, that was cheesy, lol.
Baby #2 will be sharing a room with LO, but for the first few months will be in our room. So we aren't planning anything either.
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That's a really smart plan! Good luck with your clothes!
Married 07/29/10 and blessed with our Baby Boy Bowen on 06/17/2013
I'm certainly leaning in this direction. I guess it depends on how noisy a sleeper then baby is! I know that we'll have them sleep in our room for at least the first couple months, so I'm hesitant to completely reorganize our house to turn our 2nd bedroom office into a nursery that won't really be used for a long while ...
So we definitely haven't been doing anything nursery-wise besides talking about it in a general sense. Which leads to DH's assertion that we need to move - which I don't want to deal with - so I tend to avoid the topic ;-)
I have close friends who had their baby in a one bedroom apartment. They kind of put together a little area in their living room for the baby - but they also wound up moving before their baby got too old (before a year).
DS born 6/2013
Ok maybe I was being melodramatic with the "bad mom" comment, I guess I just meant that it seems to be such a big part of the process for almost everyone else so I was feeling like I was missing out. I agree with you and PP, babies need love and food and the basics, not coordinating curtains and murals on their nursery walls (although that's great if you can/want to do it). I'm going to embrace doing things the simple way, and be grateful for all the money we're saving!
Nope. Not having a nursery until I buy a home of my own. I make a decent living and I will not stress out about it.
Don't feel bad!! Aww
My sister had the same thing and just made room in her room until her new little one was old enough to sleep in the same room with his brother. Regardless if you're having a whole room or a small portion it's fun and aggravating to get ready for them and figure out how they are going to "move in". So please don't feel bad or think we are excluding you.
I would love to hear tips on how to organize for a small space!! What is really necessary, etc?
We are having twins and will run out of room fast. Ours will be sleeping in our room for the first 6months most likely too! Until they roll around too much in the double bassinet.
You're not alone! When DH & I called it quits on baby making this summer, we moved into a smaller place with one bedroom. Financially, it worked better so I didn't have to work while I finished school. Well, surprise! Our skepticism came back & (happily) smacked us in the asss.
We're going to get a co-sleeper bassinet to put next to the bed, & a small changing table with storage. I plan to decorate a "corner" of the room (probably by the changing table) to get somewhat of my nursery decorating fix. But it's just not the same. Like you, we'll probably move again in a year to accommodate a growing child.
I hope that makes you feel a little better to know some of us are in the same boat. I know I feel better!
EDD 07/29/2017
to be honest, that's all you need
I BF LO#1, so she slept in bed with us or next to our bed for most of her first year. We did naps in the crib in her room but she fought that for a good six months.
You will be fine though I understand how you are feeling.
Ditto, x2! Both kids will be in our room.
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I felt like that when I was pregnant with M. We were just moving back out to the city and our time limit with DH's new job was really tight so we ended up in this super small one bedroom apartment. Our bedroom literally had about 2ft of space on each side of the mattress and after we put the crib in, there was about 3-4ft of space between the front of the crib and the end of our bed... it was very cramped and there was zero room to decorate. We ended up forgoing the changing table (no room!) and I did a "diaper-ing station" using one of those closet-maid cubicles, stood up on it's end... there was room for two of the canvas bins, one I filled with diapers and the other with changing odds and ends, and then the wipe container and monitor sat on top. Our glider/ottoman set went in the living room with our other furniture. I felt super guilty and ashamed seeing all of the adorable nurseries PIPed on here but in the end, all of that furniture and bedding doesn't mean squat. NONE of it is a necessity and having it or not having it doesn't determine your ability as a mom
We've moved into a bigger place now and still aren't really decorating or planning a nursery, LO will just stay in a crib in our room for the first few months and then go share with M until we move into a house next year. Not everyone does the whole nursery thing, whether they have the room or not.
We live in a tiny cabin in rural Alabama. One bedroom. We're planning for hubby to enclose the back porch & turn it into a small nursery (about 8' x 10'). But as that project hasn't been started yet, I'm preparing myself to be positive and flexible even without it. At any rate, if we do get the house finished, we won't have much left over to spend on decorating a nursery.
I really believe that we already have the important things: a place of our own, peace & quiet, family nearby, and lots of love and happiness spilling over everywhere. Our child will be safe and warm and dry and fed and loved--the rest are extras.
And all that nesting I'm dying to do? I'm going to satisfy those urges by reworking our storage space, building bookcases, and generally getting our place into apple pie order.
We're not!
Baby will room with us and when we're ready to move him/her to the crib they'll share a room with DS.
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ditto, my job ends, I'm due, and we move...all in June...so I have ideas for a nursery but truth be told, baby will probably have an empty room with the necessities for awhile lol