GTKY: Over 35 Mommas

gscoville · January 2013

Being well past 35 myself (I'm 39), I'm just curious about some of the different scenarios bringing us all here.

Is this your first, second, third+ child?

If you have other children, are they from a previous marriage/relationship or with your current partner? How old are they?

Do you have friends your age also having babies?

How are your family/friends dealing with your pregnancy?

If you've been pregnant before, how are you finding this pregnancy in comparison?

lovelyday39 · January 2013

I was 39 when we conceived, am now 40. This is our first and probably one and only. I'm really the last of my friends to have a baby and most friends/family assumed we weren't going to have any. Surprise!

I was really apprehensious that we would get a lot of side eyes and comments, but I have to say I was pleasantly surprised by all the love and warm support we have received thus far.

The only issue I've had is with the perinatologist that's just a little too "in your face" about fetal death facts for my age group and to not get too comfortable b/c things "hide" (ie: trying to push me into an amnio which I always knew I would never get).

I mean,I know it's reality, but I'd really like to not focus on it please and thank you. The PN has a good cop/bad cop routine going w/my OB- the PN will leave me w/a zinger after an U/S (that's TOTALLY NORMAL btw) and then I go into my OB who's very positive and upbeat.

gscoville · January 2013

Is this your first, second, third+ child? Second

If you have other children, are they from a previous marriage/relationship or with your current partner? How old are they? My one daughter from a previous marriage is 18 years old

Do you have friends your age also having babies? Yes, I have several friends having babies at a similar age, many have recently had their first, one had two teenagers from a previous marriage before having two more in the last couple years. It's nice to not be the only one!

How are your family/friends dealing with your pregnancy? Most are pretty excited. This baby will be the first grandchild for my hubby's mom so his entire family (he has a huge family of uncles, aunts, cousins, etc) are ecstatic. My family all know I never wanted only one child, just didn't happen due to my previous marriage ending, and now I'm with someone they really love they're quite thrilled. However my mom is also very nervous for me, knowing my age and the risks involved. We live just a few minutes' walk apart, so she feels the need to check up on me frequently, I'm beginning to feel like we live too close! Lol

If you've been pregnant before, how are you finding this pregnancy in comparison? With my daughter I had very bad m/s, but other than that a pretty uneventful pregnancy - from what I can remember anyways, it was 18 years ago! This time around I haven't (yet) had any m/s, for which I'm eternally grateful.

gscoville · January 2013

lovelyday39:
I was 39 when we conceived, am now 40. This is our first and probably one and only. I'm really the last of my friends to have a baby and most friends/family assumed we weren't going to have any. Surprise!
I was really apprehensious that we would get a lot of side eyes and comments, but I have to say I was pleasantly surprised by all the love and warm support we have received thus far.
The only issue I've had is with the perinatologist that's just a little too "in your face" about fetal death facts for my age group and to not get too comfortable b/c things "hide" (ie: trying to push me into an amnio which I always knew I would never get).
I mean,I know it's reality, but I'd really like to not focus on it please and thank you. The PN has a good cop/bad cop routine going w/my OB- the PN will leave me w/a zinger after an U/S (that's TOTALLY NORMAL btw) and then I go into my OB who's very positive and upbeat.

I so totally agree!

SCSmith2011 · January 2013

Is this your first, second, third+ child? My first

If you have other children, are they from a previous marriage/relationship or with your current partner? How old are they? I have a SD but no bio children.

Do you have friends your age also having babies? No, I'm pretty much the last.

How are your family/friends dealing with your pregnancy? Only my mom knows and she's over the moon.

If you've been pregnant before, how are you finding this pregnancy in comparison?

danuli8 · January 2013

gscoville:
Is this your first, second, third+ child? First
Do you have friends your age also having babies? Nope. Closest one has a five year-old. I am dead last among everyone I know.
How are your family/friends dealing with your pregnancy? Everyone is really happy for me. Very little side-eyeing or worrying about how old I am, for which I am grateful.

AZAmy77 · January 2013

Is this your first, second, third+ child? This is our first, (at 35) - would like to have 2, but will see what life brings us.

If you have other children, are they from a previous marriage/relationship or with your current partner? How old are they? First for both of us

Do you have friends your age also having babies? Would say that most of our friends that plan on having children have had them. But also note that a lot of these friends had children at 35+ as well. Have a few friends that just had babies last year.

How are your family/friends dealing with your pregnancy? Everyone is pretty excited for us. Really only had strangers remark upon age risks - even better.

If you've been pregnant before, how are you finding this pregnancy in comparison? Had one pregnancy that ended at 6 weeks, so not much to compare to.

ShellBear+ · January 2013

Is this your first, second, third+ child? First

Do you have friends your age also having babies? I do have one friend the same age as me who is due 3 months after me so that will be fun. Most have kids already.

How are your family/friends dealing with your pregnancy? Everyone is super excited for us, its been really nice.

If you've been pregnant before, how are you finding this pregnancy in comparison? Well I've been pregnant before but not past 9 weeks so this is all new. I am finding this to be a pretty easy pregnancy so far, knock on wood.

kat1221 · January 2013

Is this your first, second, third+ child?

Second

If you have other children, are they from a previous marriage/relationship or with your current partner? How old are they?

4.5 year old boy with current husband

Do you have friends your age also having babies?

Our friends have kids but the youngest is probably 2.

How are your family/friends dealing with your pregnancy?

Everyone is super excited

If you've been pregnant before, how are you finding this pregnancy in comparison?

Both have been pretty uneventful. This time around it took longer to get pregnant which sucked but overall it's been great. I am just now getting to where I am DONE!! I feel pretty uncomfortable:(

Country Girl in the City · January 2013

gscoville:

Being well past 35 myself (I'm 39), I'm just curious about some of the different scenarios bringing us all here. I am 38.

Is this your first, second, third+ child? First

If you have other children, are they from a previous marriage/relationship or with your current partner? How old are they? N/A

Do you have friends your age also having babies? yes, there is a baby boom going on in my group. I am kind of jealous since I am the only one that had to pay for a baby.

How are your family/friends dealing with your pregnancy? Everyone is really excited. The ones that know about my heath issues realize what a miracle this is. Others are socked because DH and I have been together 17 years and married for 13 and so they just assumed that we would not have children. We get told often what good parents we will be and we have a stronger support system that I ever imagined.

If you've been pregnant before, how are you finding this pregnancy in comparison? I have never been pregnant before so I can't compare it to my own but this has been a harder pregnancy than my sister or my friends.

letzgoracing81 · January 2013

Is this your first, second, third+ child? 1st Child for both of us. I am 38 yrs old, boyfriend is 39 years old. We were only dating 6 mos when I got pregnant...very much a surprise.

Do you have friends your age also having babies? Most of our friends/family all have older children...a few even have teenagers. I am the oldest of 4 children...but the last to have a baby.

How are your family/friends dealing with your pregnancy? Shocked and happy. Usually the first words out of their mouth were "omg...I thought you said you were never having kids..." This is the first biological grandchild for my boyfriend's father....so he is obviously over-the-moon happy

If you've been pregnant before, how are you finding this pregnancy in comparison? I have never been pregnant before this...so I have nothing to compare it to

gundy21 · January 2013

Is this your first, second, third+ child? 1st Child for both of us. Will be our only. I turn 40 this May and DH turned 41 a month ago. We started trying about 4 months after the wedding and it took us 11 cycles. We were in the middle of our IF workups (mixed bag of good and bad results) when we got our BFP on our own.Do you have friends your age also having babies? Most of our local friends have young kids - many were 35+ and some even 40+. My younger brother got married at 22, had an unplanned honeymoon baby, and they now have 16, 14, and 12 year old kids. I am on a very different path than him! DH's brother (39) and sister (35) do not have any kids yet and we are giving them hope that it could still happen for them.How are your family/friends dealing with your pregnancy? Very happy and extremely supportive. I wish my brother lived closer - his kids want to babysit but they are 3+ hours away from us.

atlmommy37 · January 2013

Is this your first, second, third+ child? My fourth biological, sixth all together I'm 37 hubby 35

If you have other children, are they from a previous marriage/relationship or with your current partner? How old are they? 3 from previous marriage 25,22,18 two with current husband 11,6

Do you have friends your age also having babies? No, I'm going to be all alone

How are your family/friends dealing with your pregnancy? Our family is so excited

If you've been pregnant before, how are you finding this pregnancy in comparison?

I've knew I was pregnant very very early like 7 dpo verses my other pregnancies I didn't know until I was pregnant until 6-8 weeks along.

babystoli · January 2013

Is this your first, second, third+ child? It will be our first (of hopefully 2)

If you have other children, are they from a previous marriage/relationship or with your current partner? How old are they?

Do you have friends your age also having babies? Yep. I have a few friends who are having kids or who have recently had kids.

How are your family/friends dealing with your pregnancy? super excited!!

If you've been pregnant before, how are you finding this pregnancy in comparison? I lost my previous pregnancy at 10 weeks. I felt prety good that entire pregnancy. And with this one, I've been miserable! Zofran is my favorite. I hope that is a good sign.

AmyM72 · January 2013

Is this your first, second, third+ child? Hopefully our first, we had a loss over the summer, I'm 40 and DH is 43.

If you have other children, are they from a previous marriage/relationship or with your current partner? How old are they?

Do you have friends your age also having babies? Not really, a few of our friends have older kids, but most do not.

How are your family/friends dealing with your pregnancy? We haven't told anyone yet... we told our parents with our first PG and they were of course thrilled (both our younger brothers both have 3 kids each, so we are kind of late to the party.)

If you've been pregnant before, how are you finding this pregnancy in comparison? Nausea about he same, but I am so tired that I feel like I could sleep 12 hours a day!

Abeille · January 2013

I'm 38, 39 when the baby will be born.

This is my 2nd, and most likely my last. I have a 3yo daughter both with my husband.

I have quite a few friends in their mid to late 30s having babies or ttc...including my sister who is getting married in April and plans to start ttc right after, she'll be 37.

We've only been telling people since Christmas. Everyone is happy and supportive

I'm finding this pregnancy more exhausting,but I think it's mostly because I have a 3yo.

trevinosnm · January 2013

I am currently 39 and will be 39 before DS #2 is born in May.

Is this your first, second, third+ child? Second child for me, but first for my DH

If you have other children, are they from a previous marriage/relationship or with your current partner? How old are they? My DS is 14 from a previous marriage but DH has been a part of DS life since he was 3 and thinks of him as his own.

Do you have friends your age also having babies? I do not have any friends my age that are pregnant or have young children. Although my brother is also expecting at end of July he lives in Texas and I am in Colorado. We are 10 years apart and not as close as I'd like our families to be.

How are your family/friends dealing with your pregnancy? All family is super excited as it has taken us several years to finally get pregnant.

If you've been pregnant before, how are you finding this pregnancy in comparison? There is so much about my first pregnancy that I honestly don't remember so I feel like I am failing miserably. I am trying in many different ways to remember this pregnancy than I did in the first one. Plus my marriage this time around is much more stable and a wonderfully supportive DH.

smrtalec33 · January 2013

I'm 36, and my husband is 39. This is the first child for each of us. We only met and got married a couple of years ago, so felt extremely lucky to be able to conceive this child after several months of TTC.

I do have other friends in my age group or older who are just now having their first babies. I think life just happens later in the New York metro area.

Our families are very happy for us. Both of our fathers have passed away, but my husband's mother is overjoyed about her first grandchild and is knitting up a storm. My mother, sadly, has Alzheimer's, but she is able to remember that I'm pregnant and ask how I'm feeling, which is sweet.

Nothing to compare it to, but the nausea of the first tri had me surrendering to Zofran.

Glad this 35 and over community exists! Good luck to you all.

starting all over again · January 2013

My 2nd DD and this one is with a new DH. my DD1 is now 12 and loving the fact that she will be a big sister to a girl. I don't have other friends having babies ATM. My friends and family are very supportive and surprised to see me starting all over again. In comparison to my 1st, this is so much different. I now have GD since 10 wks. and currently on STD since week 31. I really had it easy with DD. I worked right till the day before EDD and delivered on it! I was working almost 70-80 hrs a week and this one really takes it's toll!!

mouserny76 · January 2013

Hi I just recently turned 36.

Is this your first, second, third+ child? It will be our first, would love to have one or two more.

If you have other children, are they from a previous marriage/relationship or with your current partner? How old are they?

Do you have friends your age also having babies? Yes, totally a baby boom within my circle of friends. Many are on their 2nd, 3rd or 4th.

How are your family/friends dealing with your pregnancy? Very excited! My younger sister is also having a baby 3 months after ours. We are excited to have cousins so close in age!

If you've been pregnant before, how are you finding this pregnancy in comparison?

lilblt19 · January 2013

gscoville:
Being well past 35 myself (I'm 39), I'm just curious about some of the different scenarios bringing us all here.
Is this your first, second, third+ child? First child for both of us. I'm 39 and DH is 44.
If you have other children, are they from a previous marriage/relationship or with your current partner? How old are they?
Do you have friends your age also having babies? Not friends my age but some of my friends/co-workers younger than me are also pregnant.
How are your family/friends dealing with your pregnancy? It took us awhile to get pregnant so everyone is happy for us. DH is an only child so my MIL is crazy excited. And I haven't heard any comments or gotten any side-eyes regarding our age. If it's happening, at least people aren't doing it in front of us.
If you've been pregnant before, how are you finding this pregnancy in comparison?

MT-Head · January 2013

This is my second, and I'll be 39 when he is born in March. I was 36 when my first was born in October, 2010. My husband and I have been together since I was in law school, in 1997. We got engaged in '99 and married in 2001. We just kept waiting for the "right time" to have a baby. Neither of us have any medical issues. We finally decided to stop actively avoid pregnancy and try for a baby and we were successful in the second month with each of our sons. Friends of mine who are a little younger (early 30s) are having babies, but my best friend, who is 2 years older than me, is done (she had her last at age 38). My family is thrilled with it all. My parents never put pressure on us to have kids, and neither did my husband's parents. I think everyone was completely surprised when we announced the first one. A few other relatives confided in me that they assumed we just didn't want to have any kids. I am more tired with this pregnancy (keeping up with a toddler will do that to you), but I don't have the foot swelling I had with my first. I also am watching what I eat more - I went hog wild and gained 60 lbs +- with my first, so I am trying to keep this one at no more than 35. It was a *** trying to loose all of that extra weight last time.

technigirl · January 2013

Is this your first, second, third+ child?

Second

If you have other children, are they from a previous marriage/relationship or with your current partner? How old are they?

My daughter is with my husband. She turned 2 in November.

Do you have friends your age also having babies?

Not really. I have a friend who is 36 and has an 18 month old. I have another friend who is 40 but has no kids, and I don't think she wants any.

How are your family/friends dealing with your pregnancy?

They are happy for us!

If you've been pregnant before, how are you finding this pregnancy in comparison?

About the same. Not as much acne as with my daughter though. I did show a little earlier with this one too.

mourningintodancing · January 2013

I turned 40 in November and this will be our first child. I was previously married and struggled with infertility the whole time (on clomid for 1 yr, one MC) probably due to the stress of an abusive marriage. After that, single for too many years. I got married May 2012 to the most amazing man on the planet. We TTC for 6 months and now baby is on the way.

Lots of friends are having babies, but I top the chart for age! My immediate family and a few close friends know. My parents said nothing, but I saw tears in my dad's eyes. I think they are just worried about me. My friends are very excited for us. My SIL is also my best friend and she is excited beyond words. Her kids are 1 & 3 so we are already talking play dates.

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