Family drama - advice on picking a date?

MinnesotanMom · January 2013

I am due on May 14th.

I thought you were supposed to have a shower two months before the due date (is that true?).

But... my MIL says that she is going to be out of town for much of March, so that might not work. She hasn't set the exact dates yet.

As a result, my sister (who lives out of town) randomly left me a voicemail today saying that the weekend of Feb. 15th would work well with her schedule to have the shower, if it's not going to be in March. She wanted to know if that date would work for me.

I feel overwhelmed and don't know what to say. Is Feb. 15th too early? (seems awful early to me...and I haven't really registered yet either) But is April too late, after my MIL gets back?

Thanks for any insights!

Shayliz · January 2013

You could have a shower any time, April will be fine and so could February. My hostesses threw my family shower when I was 27w along because it was the only time I would be back in my hometown.

Some say they want the shower early so they can feel prepared.. Honestly I haven't even unpacked everything I got from my shower yet so the timing didn't make me feel more or less prepared.

wcvsb3b5 · January 2013

I think either is fine. Whatever works for you and your hostess.

Wish82 · January 2013

I agree with PP, whatever works for your hosts and makes you comfortable. When I have hosted, I try to make sure it's by the time the MTB is 36 weeks (considering the last one I did had her baby at 38 weeks, we were all thankful we n't wait any later.).

Fo me, I'd rather not have a shower earlier than 30 weeks, but it is most important what works for your host.

Edited to fix typo

RachelandEduardo · January 2013

I'm due May 1st. My family has too much going on in March and I have to much going on in April so my shower will be February 17th. I don't feel like its too early at all, especially if it works for you and others.

EastCoastBride · January 2013

In the end, YOUR schedule is what matters. not your MIL or yoursister. what works best for you? People are there to see you. Not yourMIL or your sister.

Stacey209 · January 2013

I dont think there is any set time - its whatever works. I think early April is fine. My due date is middle of March and my shower is in early February. Good luck! Dont sweat it too much - it will all work out!

foxyroxy · January 2013

I am such a Girl Scout, I always prefer being prepared as soon as possible. An early shower would give you plenty of time to see what you've got and then buy what you need to fill in the gaps, so to speak. Plus that gives you one less thing to have to deal with in the home stretch. It won't take you that long to register and you can always add stuff as you think of it.

That said, there is no such thing as too early or too late. No baby shower calendar god will smite you for having it in either February or April. Whatever works for the hostesses and makes you a happy mama will be perfect!

rhubarb123 · January 2013

EastCoastBride:
In the end, YOUR schedule is what matters. not your MIL or yoursister. what works best for you? People are there to see you. Not yourMIL or your sister.

I kind of got the feeling that her MIL and sister were hosting.

happylady5 · January 2013

I don't think that's too early. With Thanksgiving, Christmas and New Year's I had one shower at 27 weeks and didn't have any others until this past weekend (at 32 weeks). I'll have my last one on Thursday (at 33 weeks). (I'm due Feb 26)

From the very beginning, I was honest and up front with the ladies who offered to throw showers and told them I wanted them all done by early January. That gives us time to figure out what we need, that we didn't get, and to get everything squared away. Plus, still have time to just relax and enjoy the time before LO's arrival, with as little stress and things planned as possible.

I'm a planner and wouldn't want them any later than I've had them. I'm starting to get tired and I can't imagine having to organize the nursery and get last minute items any closer to my due date than I already am. But that's just me.

ggatlanta · January 2013

Up to you.

I'd rather do it late, because I am glad to have the shower to look forward to as I near the end of my pregnancy (it distracts me from the impending due date). I admit I might have chosen an earlier date out of impatience, but now I'm glad that wasn't under my control.

If they give you a choice, I'd pick the later date, as long as it's before, say, 38 or 39 weeks. If they choose without your input, either of the options you described sounds good, and I wouldn't worry.

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