Beautiful or Handsome?

Mar5195 · January 2013

I love my ILs they are amazing. And they are great with boundaries. Seriously they never really overstep. I think they are scared of me. Which is never a bad thing!

I call my son beautiful. Because he is. He is absolutely perfect.

But my ILs try to correct me by talking to my son.

So I look at my boy and say "You are the Most Beautiful Boy in the World!! Mommy loves you baby". And one of them will then turn around and say to him "No Mommy he's not beautiful he's handsome". And then they go around talking about how beautiful is for girls and handsome is for boys.

Uh no. Beautiful is beautiful.

I hate to get all passive aggressive cause it's so not my style. But am I wrong is beautiful strictly feminine? I can see handsome for boys only but I don't see beautiful that way.

I'm curious what do you all think?

JenK1108 · January 2013

I could either way on this one, but my H definitely thinks that beautiful is feminine and hates when I call Ethan that!

jmccall79 · January 2013

I say both to Ian! I don't think at this age it matters. Maybe as he gets older, I might not say he's beautiful...like my nephew, he's 3 and he's handsome.

jja0812 · January 2013

I call little boys beautiful all the time. I would hope no one would ever be offended if I thought their son was beautiful!

And while I typically don't use handsome as an adjective for females, I have heard other people do it and I don't think it's strange. I think it used to be a lot more common than it is now, but I also think it's cultural. Someone can correct me if I'm mistaken, but I think in Latino cultures it is just as common to call females guapa (handsome) as it is to call males guapo.

NatnDyl · January 2013

I think whatever you want to say to your son is fine and its rude of them to correct you.

hizah05 · January 2013

I call my son beautiful all the time. As a baby he is. Not sure I'd say it when he gets older but who knows!

ALane1128 · January 2013

I say both to Jackson but DH always corrects me when I say he's beautiful and tells me to say he's handsome. It's honestly your son, so say what you want. I'm still going to call him beautiful. Because he is. LOL I guess when they try and correct you, maybe say "yes he is handsome, but he's also beautiful as well" And if you have a good relationship with them, I don't think they'd be to offended by that

jldubb0626 · January 2013

I personally am in the camp that girls are beautiful and boys are handsome, but it's honestly a personal preference and I could care less what other parents call their babies. Maybe if he's 16 and your calling him beautiful, it'd be awkward but as a baby, who cares?

But I don't really think it's something to fight over either. If this is your only complaint about them, I'd just let it go. I'd just let them speak their mind, nod my head, call him beautiful and move on.

laura.noel · January 2013

NatnDyl:
I think whatever you want to say to your son is fine and its rude of them to correct you.

This!

I think in our culture, it is more common to use beautiful for a woman, and handsome for a man. However, your baby is not a grown man or woman. I think that until they start being more masculine or feminine, either word is equally appropriate. I don't know when I'd switch. Probably when he's old enough to tell me "Mommy, GIRLS are beautiful!" Then I would say something about him being my baby, and my being allowed to call him beautiful if I want, but I'd probably phase the word out after that.

And we're just talking about cultural habits, here. From a strictly correct-use-of-words standpoint, both are correct. If you look up "handsome" in a dictionary, "beautiful" will often be listed as a synonym.

lancyjo · January 2013

Beautiful is beautiful.

I've even heard women called handsome.

Shoot, I say that my hubs is a "beautiful man" all the time, because he's beautiful for so much more than just his looks. He's got a heart of gold, and that's beautiful to me.

"handsome" just seems like it's only talking about looks.

Mar5195 · January 2013

Thanks Ladies. I will be calling my son beautiful for as long as I want. Never really planned to stop I was just curious. But I do think I will mention to my ILs that correcting me in front of my son (even on the littlest thing) is not going to fly. They never take any thing I say super serious or get their panties in a bunch. They'll respect it and there won't be any debate. Like I said they are a little scared of me.

But I think it's important for them to know I'm raising this beautiful boy the way I (well DH & I) feel fit. And they don't have to call him beautiful if they don't want to. I always think about John Lennon's Beautiful Boy son when I think of my lil man.

MrsGlaedr · January 2013

NatnDyl:
I think whatever you want to say to your son is fine and its rude of them to correct you.

THIS!

But, since you asked for opinions, mine is that beautiful is a particular adjective. Like, an old bf of mine had bright green eyes and long eyelashes. He was beautiful. I feel like it IS kind of feminine, but sometimes boys/men have feminine features and it works for them! I would call Jdubbs Eli Beautiful But Starbucks Cody is more handsome. Both are adorable babies, its just the look.

So... thats my roundabout (and hopefully not offensive..) way of saying it can go either way.

Shmogan09 · January 2013

I tell Logan he is beautiful all the time and he is 3! Because he is a truly beautiful child. I also call Kellen my beautiful baby. Again, he is beautiful! Now, if I told DH he was beautiful that would sound kind of weird.

To me, "handsome" is too old a word for a baby boy.

Amberrrr · January 2013

I call him both.
I tell him he's such a beautiful baby boy.
And I also tell him he's a handsome young man.
Handsome
chiefly dialect : appropriate, suitable 2 : moderately large : sizable 3 : marked by skill or cleverness : adroit 4 : marked by graciousness or generosity : liberal 5 : having
a pleasing and usually impressive or dignified appearance

Beautiful
having qualities of beauty : exciting aesthetic pleasure 2 : generally pleasing : excellence

I definitely think men can be called beautiful. I even tell my husband he's beautiful.

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