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bummed about mom/baby group....

beany02beany02 member
in Babies: 6 - 9 Months

I work part time a few evenings a week, and am a SAHM mom during the day every day. I have been getting major cabin fever this winter since its too cold to do much outside with LO, and we have been cramped up in our small apartment. So i joined a few mom's groups on meetup.com. I had a great experience finding a running group a few years ago this way, so i thought i would try it out again.

I found a group that sounded awesome, and I was excited/nervous for our first meetup. and it sucked. the other moms had toddlers and newborns, and a few DD's age (8 months), and they seemed really......stuck up. I felt totally unwelcome. It was awkward. I was friendly and tried to talk to some of them, but i kind of got the cold shoulder and it felt like they were all really good friends and i was the "outsider." I get it that a lot of them have already formed close friendships, but it would have been nice if they were a little more welcoming to me!  as i type this im realizing i sound like a little kid on the playground who has no friends. lol. maybe i will just try a different group, that doesnt make me feel like im in a "Mean Girls" sequel. Or just spend more time with my friends that also have kids. anybody else have luck joining a moms group?

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Re: bummed about mom/baby group....

  • blushingbride_08blushingbride_08 member
    Try a different group. I belong to a great one if my area. There are a variety of activities daily and it is a large group so I don't have to see the same people everyday. There are a few moms that I do not like. I just ignore them but I try not to judge the group because of those two weirdos.  Good luck!
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  • brennarobbiebrennarobbie member
    Oh no! I had a similar experience with my workout group, but it turned out that we all just had to get to know each other. Maybe it's the same for you? Maybe try one or two more times? If it's the same feeling you get each time, then definitely find some nicer mommies! :o)
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  • oliversmommy32912oliversmommy32912 member
    This is what makes me so afraid to join mommy groups. It doesn't help that I'm a very outgoing person...I can't imagine anything more mortifying than sitting in a group of women silently while they all talk to each other and ignore me. I'm waiting to find a friend who belongs to a group so I at least have someone.
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  • hay1122hay1122 member
    I agree, give it another shot.  I joined a mommy group on meetup and it took a little while for me to get to know some people, but now I love it.  There are some moms that I don't really care for, and there's sometimes drama, but I just avoid it all.  Try to find one mom that has a child LO's age to talk to.  I do better one-on-one anyway.
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  • thehillsarealive0000thehillsarealive0000
    Yikes, that is rough. Women can be so nasty! I would try another group, don't give up.
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  • SunAndRainSunAndRain member
    I agree with the others: keep trying.

    More than likely they will come to accept you. Then when you are "in" you can role model how to treat new members when the next new mom joins :
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  • cmurphy09cmurphy09 member
    Awe. Lol. Maybe try mommy me activities at your local Y. I know the one near me has a tumbling class that starts at walking thru 3 y/o. BRU might also be helpful in giving tips on local mommy and me classes. Since dd isn't walking yet, the girl I spoke with at our Y mentioned music class for baby and mom. Perhaps that could be something? And if they're stuck up, you and your lo will at least be focused on an activity, giving grounds to 'breaktheice'.
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  • IrishsapphireIrishsapphire member

    It has been hit or miss with the mom groups on meetup.com.  But the moms group that worked the best for me was actually in my neighborhood, and they offered activities during the week, as well as nights and some weekends-which works well for me as a working mother.  

    And after getting to know some of them after a couple of months, I sent some of the other moms Facebook Friendship requests, and there was only one mother who did not respond.  So I take that to be a good sign that they like me.  

    I really understand how you feel.  If you do find a good moms group, it will be just easy.  And you really want good people in your life.  

    imageimageLilypie - Personal pictureLilypie Premature Baby tickers Lilypie Premature Baby tickers image BFP on 07/18/08. Miscarriage 07/30/08. BFP 3/25/09. Confirmed second miscarriage, no heartbeat, no growth beyond 7 weeks, 5/19/09. TTC again, on baby aspirin, due to value of 23 on Anticardiolipin Antibodies. BFP 11/15/09. Brown spotting, Beta 3735 11/25/09, Beta 5602 11/28/09. Anticardiolipin Antibodies now negative, still on baby asprin. On 100 mg of Prometrium (progesterone) until 10 weeks. Good heartbeat at 1st appt. 12/16/09. Started taking fish oil. Perigestational hemorrhage and red bleeding 12/17/09. 2nd Ultrasound-8 weeks, still a heartbeat 12/17/09. Baby measured 9 weeks, still a heartbeat 12/23/09. Good NT Scan on 1/8/10, heartbeat 164. EDD 7/28/10. TEAM BLUE! Aidan Thomas born on May 26, 2010. Baby #2, BFP 11/27/11, EDD 6/5/12. TEAM PINK! Noelle Elizabeth born 4/30/12. Blessing from God, Blessing from God, Blessing from God, Blessing from God.
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