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NBR: Xmas gift for Grandma

tmaddentmadden member
in October 2011 Moms
We are having Family Christmas with my Grandma on Saturday. I got the cousins together to put money toward a plane ticket for her - some gave $50, some gave $10. Do you think I should put amounts anywhere, or just leave it at the fact that people contributed and just sign names? Just names is probably the better way to go, but I also sort of feel the people who gave $50 deserve a little more "credit." Thoughts?
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Re: NBR: Xmas gift for Grandma

  • emunbalancedemunbalanced
    Just names. If they gave, they deserve credit. No one needs to be called out because they couldn't, or didn't want to, give more. Writing names and amounts could cause some nastiness.
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  • ChunstadChunstad member

    imageemunbalanced:
    Just names. If they gave, they deserve credit. No one needs to be called out because they couldn't, or didn't want to, give more. Writing names and amounts could cause some nastiness.

    This.  Maybe just try to think in the back of your mind that they couldn't afford it, even if you know better.

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  • tmaddentmadden member
    You're right. I just needed some perspective. Thanks.
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  • HappyAardvarkHappyAardvark member
    imageemunbalanced:
    Just names. If they gave, they deserve credit. No one needs to be called out because they couldn't, or didn't want to, give more. Writing names and amounts could cause some nastiness.

    O_O. Oh man, can you imagine the hurt feelings and nastiness that would probably ensue if names and amounts were written out, like people who gave 10 should be publicly shamed for their perceived "cheapness"?? Even in the most even tempered families, this kind of pettiness could ignite the kind of hurt feelings that would take years to get over.

    I'm glad you decided to leave them off.
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  • KrisM86KrisM86 member
    Definitely just names. You're going to end up with bruised egos, hurt feelings, and embarrassed relatives if you put amounts.
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  • emunbalancedemunbalanced
    imageHappyAardvark:
    imageemunbalanced:
    Just names. If they gave, they deserve credit. No one needs to be called out because they couldn't, or didn't want to, give more. Writing names and amounts could cause some nastiness.

    O_O. Oh man, can you imagine the hurt feelings and nastiness that would probably ensue if names and amounts were written out, like people who gave 10 should be publicly shamed for their perceived "cheapness"?? Even in the most even tempered families, this kind of pettiness could ignite the kind of hurt feelings that would take years to get over.

    I'm glad you decided to leave them off.


    It would be a shiitstorm in my family. Plus, the receiver of the gift isn't going to care how much everyone went in, kwim?
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  • LatteLady5LatteLady5 member
    imageChunstad:

    imageemunbalanced:
    Just names. If they gave, they deserve credit. No one needs to be called out because they couldn't, or didn't want to, give more. Writing names and amounts could cause some nastiness.

    This.  Maybe just try to think in the back of your mind that they couldn't afford it, even if you know better.

    Yes this. I remember doing a teacher gift in fourth grade from our whole class. Everyone was supposed to bring $5 and we bought our teacher a new set of dishes. Some kids didn't and I'm sure their parents couldn't afford it and I know some kids gave more. Everybody got to sign the card anyhow and our teacher loved her gift.


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