To TV or not to TV?

klibby707 · January 2013

My friend just posted something on FBook about no TV before age 2, which I know about. When DS turned about a year and a half, we started letting him watch a show here and there. I was super sick with this pregnancy. Do you ever let little one watch TV, or am I a horrible parent???

bridetobe6808 · January 2013

My 14 month old has been watching Barney since about 6 months. There is no way we couldn't let her watch TV until 2. She loves that purple dinosaur so much. I think if and when we have a boy she is going to want to name him Barney. She claps when they clap and dances when they sing. She immediately starts screaming with joy whenever he comes on. She also loves Mickey Mouse Club, Fresh Beat Band and Veggie Tails. If you're horrible I guess I am too!

amr1218 · January 2013

Personally, I used to leave the TV on Sprout while DD was playing. There reached a point where she would stand and stare at it and I couldn't get her attention back (during flashy commercials w/ catchy songs). That bothered me. Now we leave it off 90% of the time.

My friend's kid became so addicted to TV when he was a toddler that he would have a total meltdown when it was off. Also, he couldn't go in the car or a restaurant w/o some sort of portable DVD player. I swore I wouldn't let that happen to my DD.

There are occasions that I want DD to be distracted (like if I have a migraine or need to go to the bathroom, etc) that I will turn the TV on for a short time. Otherwise, it is off.

Selfishly, I like DD to pay attention to me or DH and play rather than compete with the latest toy commercial.

mclere · January 2013

Estwd2:
Yes, I let DD watch minimal amounts of TV. No you're not a horrible parent. DD watches about 10-15 minutes maaaaybe 4x a week. I'm not concerned. The TV doesn't babysit her and she doesn't zone out. We put on Sprout and watch with her, talking about what she's seeing. There's been some great research about how co-viewing with discussion can encourage learning.
To go even further, DD is allowed to play with our iPhones and iPad when she shows an interest. This is 2013 and screens are everywhere - tvs, phones, tablets, etc. She'll be exposed to them throughout her life and I'd rather her learn to handle them correctly as she grows rather than keep them from her like they're a secret, adult thing. I believe that telling a child she can't explore your iPhone for a minute is teaching her that natural curiosity should be discouraged. I've read the research about screen time and I'm not convinced that the level of my daughter's exposure to screens is going to irreparably damage her. Flame away.

Yes

mclere · January 2013

Estwd2:
Yes, I let DD watch minimal amounts of TV. No you're not a horrible parent. DD watches about 10-15 minutes maaaaybe 4x a week. I'm not concerned. The TV doesn't babysit her and she doesn't zone out. We put on Sprout and watch with her, talking about what she's seeing. There's been some great research about how co-viewing with discussion can encourage learning.
To go even further, DD is allowed to play with our iPhones and iPad when she shows an interest. This is 2013 and screens are everywhere - tvs, phones, tablets, etc. She'll be exposed to them throughout her life and I'd rather her learn to handle them correctly as she grows rather than keep them from her like they're a secret, adult thing. I believe that telling a child she can't explore your iPhone for a minute is teaching her that natural curiosity should be discouraged. I've read the research about screen time and I'm not convinced that the level of my daughter's exposure to screens is going to irreparably damage her. Flame away.

Yes

SheLovesMrHip · January 2013

I think its really what works for your family. We have let DD watch Veggie Tales and Disney since she was several months old. She also get tv time in the moring and eve. If this makes me a bad parent of well....my kid is super happy

klibby707 · January 2013

Gotcha. Thanks for all the responses! He is sick for the first time right now (ear infections, upper respiratory infection, and pink eye), so I guess that's why I'm thinking of it. My poor little man.

brewcitybride · January 2013

My kids watch a little in the morning and a little in the afternoon - usually a Disney movie or Sesame Street. I have no issues with this - it's really everything in moderation for us, as I was raised. They also love these things more than TV- books, playing outside, music, art, being active, swimming, exercising.....why shouldn't they get to watch a little non-violent TV while Mom makes dinner?

Be smart about it and it is ok.

dbadura01 · January 2013

We turn the TV on in the morning and let him watch Disney Jr (usually Mickey Mouse Club or Little Einsteins). However, he only watches about 5 minutes before he's bored and starts running around the room. The only other TV he gets to watch is Sesame Street while he and I eat breakfast before leaving for work. We don't turn on the TV in the evening after work until after he goes to bed. Weekends, he will watch a few minutes at a time of football. We didn't start letting him watch it until he was around 17 months old and again, it's so limited that I don't mind right now.

preggersin2011 · January 2013

The only time LO has been exposed to TV is at other people's houses and after about 5 minutes she won't focus on it any more. It still bothers me that it is on in the background while we are there. I try to make play dates and other things at my house where i can control the TV to the music only channels (no video).

sportsmomma · January 2013

The TV will be on in the background a lot around here but he doesn't key into it. If we watch a show we usually watch Bubble Guppies or Mickey Mouse Clubhouse and he's watched a couple Disney movies. We're always still there with him interacting and talking about the show or movie, not just sitting him down and ignoring him while he zones out or anything like that.

gracefulruby33 · January 2013

I let DD watch some Sesame Street this morning. She also loves Jeopardy. Other than that, I really try to distract her if the tv is on but she definitely is not just glancing at the tv now if it is on. I am trying to limit the tv being on now unless it is a Sirius channel on Dish.

dairygirl19 · January 2013

We let our LO watch TV.

She loves it.

She's also a busy and active toddler who does 43643743737 stimulating, fun and learning activities in the course of her day. She's also not much of a napper so TV is good downtime for her.

She's also not watching anything harmful. A lot of Sesame Street DVDS and PBS since we don't have cable.

I cut it off at an hour a day (on rare days 2 depending on her mood). Somedays she will watch the hour in it's entirety the next she just plays away and glances occassionally.

For me it's a matter of common sense, moderation and all that jazz.

I also don't want to grow up limiting it to the extreme so she never sees it and goes nuts at someone elses house or becomes a TV junkie later on. I think it's good to set the expectation that some TV is okay but there's a point where you have to play/get back to work.

Also, she's learned quite a bit from TV. She can say a couple numbers and learned to love music from Sesame Street. Also, she got the Little People Nativity as a gift and she kisses Jesus every time she plays. No one I know taught her that. I happened to catch a bit of the Sesame Street Christmas specials he loves..and there's a part where Elmo is talking about the Christmas holiday and he kisses Jesus in his nativity.

Leap08 · January 2013

I think we started letting our 3 year old watch some TV at about 1.5 yrs. She didn't really have any interest before that. Our 13 month old still shows no interest in TV, but she could watch it with her sister if she was interested. My 3 year old still watches less than an hour of TV a day on average, a little more on weekends.

PrimRoseMama · January 2013

DD likes Jeopardy and the news. The only movies she really likes are the Ice Age ones and The Lorax. She gets the Lorax maybe once every other day.

Jeopardy and the news make her so excited. The rest of the time she's engaged with me, her toys or trying to pounce on the animals.

LoveCoffee · January 2013

DS is 20 months old I turn Sprout shows on a few times a time (not hours at a time but a little in the morning, maybe during/after lunch, before bed). So I would say it would be 2 hours a day. However the only show he "watches" and really loves is Cailou and Thomas. Other than that he is playing around.

That being said, I know when he's over my MIL's and when DH has him while I'm at work the TV is on constantly. At my MIL it's constantly on Sprout or Disney. When DH is home it can be on anything lol. When I'm home in the evenings and on weekend it's limited. Frankly it's not a battle I want to pick with DH or my MIL. I'm not concerned about DS's development at all.

laurakaz13 · January 2013

She watches about 15-20 minutes some nights. She never showed interest until maybe a month ago though. So this is new. I don't think it's a big deal.

crystaleyes39 · January 2013

I have twins and would honestly never last until 2 years old without puting on mickey mouse clubhouse. My girls love that show and helps calm them when upset. I let them watch an episode or two a day. I do however notice that my one daughter is far more into it than the other...to the point where sometimes you can't get her attention if the tv is on....So i'm thinking I may limit the tv time. Like someone else posted I dont want them to depend on it..but I definitely am not giving it up cold turkey, they love it too much.

ally81698 · January 2013

crystaleyes39:
I have twins and would honestly never last until 2 years old without puting on mickey mouse clubhouse. My girls love that show and helps calm them when upset. I let them watch an episode or two a day. I do however notice that my one daughter is far more into it than the other...to the point where sometimes you can't get her attention if the tv is on....So i'm thinking I may limit the tv time. Like someone else posted I dont want them to depend on it..but I definitely am not giving it up cold turkey, they love it too much.

LOL, this is my DD too - she has an obsession with Mickey Mouse Clubhouse. Sometimes I wave my hand in front of her face to make sure she's blinking. Her most used words are "Oh no!" and "Oh my!" just like Minnie Mouse, lol. We let her watch an episode or 2 in the morning and 1 at night. She loves it and it totally calms her down if she's upset.

boogerbearoriginal · January 2013

Estwd2:

And yes, I do believe refusing to allow your child to explore your iPhone can stifle their natural curiosity. I'm not talking about letting them have it all day, every day. I'm taking about parents who grab it from their children and freak out if their child tries to touch it, or heaven forbid, look at the screen! (Yes, I've seen this. My SIL is very much into sheltering her child from screens. She is quite unsuccessful.)
If DD reaches for it because it looks interesting and I say "No, that's Mommy's" or "No, that's not for you," I think she will come to associate curiosity with the concept of "no." Even if I don't use the word "no" and just redirect, she will eventually pick up on the fact that I don't want her touching it. Our kids will grow up with technology, more so than any other generation. I don't want it to be something new for her when I suddenly decide she's old enough. I like that it's not a foreign object to her. I like that she will understand how to handle it properly and how it works so that when she uses it for an actual purpose instead of just checking it out, she'll know how. I view this as "Oh, you're interested in the world around you and the tools that Mommy uses? Great! Let me show you how it works" as opposed to "Oh, you're interested in the world around you and the tools that Mommy uses? Oh no! Let me shelter you from it all and put you in a bubble!"

I'm getting what you're saying, but I think you're being a bit extreme on the other end. Kids need, yes need, limitations and rules as much as they need to explore and learn about their world. I don't think having certain items off limits stifles them. Just like I don't let my kid play with knives or lighters - it's not an age appropriate tool but yes, when he's older. There is nothing wrong with kids learning some things are in fact off limits.

The TV thing isn't something I can get too excited about. Unless you're leaving it on all day long it's nbd. My kid watches tv here and there, but it's not on for more than an hour at a time. We play, chase the dog, go outside, run errands, etc.

TVs have been around for a long, long time, we all grew up with TV and so did some of our parents. Somehow we all made it to adulthood and are functioning just fine, so I'm not going to freak out about it. IMO it's something that's only a big deal on TB and for mommy wars.

Netty_3 · January 2013

We do. Its more background noise. The only time he actually watches is when a song comes on. If I could get DH to turn off the tv I would love it...but apparently that's unheard of. I try to just change it to the toddler tune station on the tv...not sure if the music is bad...but he likes to dance.

swimiz500 · January 2013

I have the TV on sometimes, but DD really doesn't bother much with it. But if she watches from time to time, I don't think it would be the end of the world. Moderation, IMO.

chardonnay24 · January 2013

He rarely watches TV, but you're not a horrible parent.

CarlaAndJames · January 2013

We're a no TV before 2 house, and we do try to keep her from focusing on a backlit screen for more than a few seconds.

We've read the research, we feel strongly that it can only benefit her not to, and it's really not that hard to just leave it off. Everyone thinks we're crazy but I'm happy to read her the same book 10x instead of letting her sit in front of the TV for 20 minutes.

march2008 · January 2013

DH and I do not watch TV, so neither does DD. We had cable before she was born and realized that we were throwing money down the toilet because neither of us were interested in watching it. So, when we read the recommendations about no TV for children under age 2, we figured we would just cancel cable and save some money, too!

The way I see it, there isn't going to be any research that convinces me that watching it is beneficial for a toddler, so there isn't any harm keeping her away from it. I know I personally don't feel like I'm missing out on anything by not watching it.

I really don't understand why so many feel that they need TV in order to keep their toddler occupied for a few minutes. It does take some effort (creativity) on my part, but I have no problems taking care of what I need to take care of during the day without having her watch TV. I'm not judging anyone here that has made the decision that it's ok to watch it. I'm just saying that I can't relate when people say that it's necessary to have around for them to eat their meals, get ready for the day, etc.

klibby707 · January 2013

jakstr0808:
First of all, I'm going to admit that I didn't read every single response. I skimmed most.

TV should NOT be watched by children under 2 at the earliest and really until 3yo. For the people comparing "screen time" with iPhones and iPads, it's different depending on what you let them look at on those. The problem with the tv is the screen jumps and shifts. While the toddlers brains are developing the high frequency of screen changes and jumps can cause the brain to develop differently than one that does not watch tv. It can lead to attention disorders. Here is a great link with a video talking about the research. It's a little long but it's definitely worth your time!

https://tedxtalks.ted.com/video/TEDxRainierDimitriChristakis

Sorry it's probably not clicky, I'm on mobile.

And I honestly and seriously don't understand the people who say they NEED tv for their kids. Foster imagination people!!!! Read books, sing songs, dance, pretend play with kitchen and puppets and little animals! Ride trucks and dinosaurs and puppies! Build pillow and blanket and box forts!

You need to do some chores? Foster individual play in a safe baby proofed environment! I have two very active twin toddlers and they have NEVER watched tv. Seriously. We even made a decision to not take them to restaurants with the TVs on. If we are at a party with a tv on we move away from it. It's not that hard and it's important for our daughters' development. It's only a few years of no tv vs years of attention issues and frustration...... it's no brainer IMO.

We foster imagination as well. It started here and there when I had all day sickness for the first ten weeks of pregnancy and could not function. My husband works nights and weekends. We all do the best we can, I guess.

klibby707 · January 2013

Booger+Bear:
Estwd2:

And yes, I do believe refusing to allow your child to explore your iPhone can stifle their natural curiosity. I'm not talking about letting them have it all day, every day. I'm taking about parents who grab it from their children and freak out if their child tries to touch it, or heaven forbid, look at the screen! (Yes, I've seen this. My SIL is very much into sheltering her child from screens. She is quite unsuccessful.)
If DD reaches for it because it looks interesting and I say "No, that's Mommy's" or "No, that's not for you," I think she will come to associate curiosity with the concept of "no." Even if I don't use the word "no" and just redirect, she will eventually pick up on the fact that I don't want her touching it. Our kids will grow up with technology, more so than any other generation. I don't want it to be something new for her when I suddenly decide she's old enough. I like that it's not a foreign object to her. I like that she will understand how to handle it properly and how it works so that when she uses it for an actual purpose instead of just checking it out, she'll know how. I view this as "Oh, you're interested in the world around you and the tools that Mommy uses? Great! Let me show you how it works" as opposed to "Oh, you're interested in the world around you and the tools that Mommy uses? Oh no! Let me shelter you from it all and put you in a bubble!"
I'm getting what you're saying, but I think you're being a bit extreme on the other end. Kids need, yes need, limitations and rules as much as they need to explore and learn about their world.  I don't think having certain items off limits stifles them. Just like I don't let my kid play with knives or lighters - it's not an age appropriate tool but yes, when he's older. There is nothing wrong with kids learning some things are in fact off limits.
The TV thing isn't something I can get too excited about. Unless you're leaving it on all day long it's nbd. My kid watches tv here and there, but it's not on for more than an hour at a time. We play, chase the dog, go outside, run errands, etc. 
TVs have been around for a long, long time, we all grew up with TV and so did some of our parents. Somehow we all made it to adulthood and are functioning just fine, so I'm not going to freak out about it.  IMO it's something that's only a big deal on TB and for mommy wars.

Somehow, we all made it. You are right. :

sharinfaith · January 2013

gracefulruby33:
I let DD watch some Sesame Street this morning. She also loves Jeopardy. Other than that, I really try to distract her if the tv is on but she definitely is not just glancing at the tv now if it is on. I am trying to limit the tv being on now unless it is a Sirius channel on Dish.

my DD loves jeopardy too!! she watches it at my parent's house with them twice a week when they watch her. they had said something about her liking it, but it wasn't until i witnessed how fascinated she was that it shocked me.

maybe she'll grow up knowing random facts? that's cool with me. she can be my trivial pursuit parter

kcisthebombdotcom · January 2013

jakstr0808:
klibby707:
Booger+Bear:
TVs have been around for a long, long time, we all grew up with TV and so did some of our parents. Somehow we all made it to adulthood and are functioning just fine, so I'm not going to freak out about it. IMO it's something that's only a big deal on TB and for mommy wars.
Somehow, we all made it. You are right. :
If you watch the video in the link I posted, you will see they specifically talk about the differences in the television we grew up with vs what there is now. Remember how our parents generation were all about "there was no such thing as ADHD when we were growing up" well....it's super prevalent now. Not blaming it entirely on tv but if there's a chance why risk it? Babies don't need to watch tv. I've seen lots of people struggle with attention disorders and I think if I can do anything to prevent it, what's the harm. Also, to the poster who says they've seen the studies with mixed results....why would you chance it for the times the results were negative for the subject? Doesn't make sense to me. But to each their own i guess.

...because not all research is good research. As a sociology/psych major in college a good chunk of my education was focused in research. Much of the research on television is pre-2000 when educational television programming was incredibly limited and consisted of barney singing some god awful songs. In the more recent research, content is key. Most studies suggest educational television having a variety of benefits to development and benefits beginning as young as 18 months. Also, the more recent research in the shift of children's television from shows like sesame street/barney to characters who ask children questions/encourage participation seems to make a difference as well and provide more benefits vs stuff like teletubbies did. I think television when used appropriately can be a valuable educational tool. It has encouraged imaginative play--my son loves to mimic his favorite characters. It has helped with number/letter recognition--I bought my son a toy to work on number/letter identification for christmas so we could start working on some early reading skills and I was surprised at how much he already knew! Like any tool, I find it provides benefits when used appropriately. Too much can cause harm (just like eating too many apples could cause harm) but the right amount with the right content can help foster development and learning.

I think the "under two" rule exists because of the incredibly limited research on that sector of the population as well as the large variances in development at those ages. I do think there is a certain age where tv is nothing more than a box with moving lights. I can tell you both my kids were active participants in television watching at 18 months in terms of answering yes/no questions as well as mimicking words characters were saying. I think some kids need to be two (or perhaps even older) as every child develops differently. Due to that I do agree with the general recommendation being two but parents have to take into account their child as well. I also think a lot of recommendations exist because you can't trust the "average" person to practice moderation so saying a little is ok encourages indulgence. Kind of like how we tell women not to drink alcohol at all while pregnant but in reality a small glass of wine on ocassion could actually provide benefits to a pregnant woman.

I think it's silly when people of an older generation argue ADHD didn't exist with kids. All the learning difficulties that existed now existed then--we just didn't have the knowledge we did today. These kids were swept under the rug and ended up dropping/failing out of school at a young age. While I think that we tend to overdiagnoseI think that's a better thing than missing kids with genuine problems that could be helped.

As a child who struggled with a genetic neurological disorder that impacted speech, sensory and attention difficulties as a kid, the most the school department did was send my parents home with a note on my report card that said I had issues with paying attention. There was no intervention (besides speech therapy once a week that didnt start until first grade). For my grandparents kids who struggled--many dropped out at a young age and went into the military to provide income. My son at 20 months was showing similar signs with regards to speech and attention. We had a therapist who had knowledge of what we were dealing with and we started intensive therapy. At 3 his speech is age appropriate (minus some artic errors), he's doing amazingly academically and his attention span is above average. I'm grateful our generation knows a lot more than our parents/grandparents did.

kcisthebombdotcom · January 2013

jakstr0808:
I'm not arguing that the content of children programming isn't educational and valuable, but that even shows designed for toddlers have too many and too quick screen shifts that effect the way their brain develops. And that I can sing and dance with them, ask them questions and teach them letters and numbers myself without the flashy screen jumps. I have a science background from an Ivy League institution and have done my fair share of research [though I admit not in psychology or child development] and the studies that I have seen recently are compelling to me. Plus I don't find it hard to just not turn the tv on when they're around. For the record. I am also not really judging parents who let their kids watch tv. I only judge when parents say they couldn't not let them watch, like it's some monumental task to just keep the tv off. I mostly post on threads like these to share my opinion and some information I find useful for other parents to make a more informed decision other than...well we did it and we're fine.

I'm LOLing at the "it shifts the way their brain develops". A young child's brain is in a constant state of change television exposure or not. I don't argue that the brain adapts to their environment and therefore excessive usage could cause issues socially. developmentally and affect attention. There is nothing out there that suggests small amounts is going to permanently change a child's brain in some sort of negative fashion. Even the studies involving television having negative impact are weak at best since brain development involves so many other factors--genetics certainly play a huge role. Correlation does not equal causation.

I can also sing and dance and teach letters without tv. l don't think that it's an essential tool to teach those skills but it is an educational tool nonetheless. I didn't need to get my kids a zoo membership to teach them to identify animals but I did anyway because it provides enjoyment to them. Television is something that also provides enjoyment, helps them learn and fosters their imagination. Used appropriately I don't see the downside.

klibby707 · January 2013

jakstr0808:
klibby707:
Booger+Bear:
TVs have been around for a long, long time, we all grew up with TV and so did some of our parents. Somehow we all made it to adulthood and are functioning just fine, so I'm not going to freak out about it.  IMO it's something that's only a big deal on TB and for mommy wars.

Somehow, we all made it. You are right. :

If you watch the video in the link I posted, you will see they specifically talk about the differences in the television we grew up with vs what there is now. Remember how our parents generation were all about "there was no such thing as ADHD when we were growing up" well....it's super prevalent now. Not blaming it entirely on tv but if there's a chance why risk it? Babies don't need to watch tv. I've seen lots of people struggle with attention disorders and I think if I can do anything to prevent it, what's the harm. Also, to the poster who says they've seen the studies with mixed results....why would you chance it for the times the results were negative for the subject? Doesn't make sense to me. But to each their own i guess.

There are risks for a lot of different things. It's not like my kid is watching sponge bob. Studies change often too. The thing is ADHD WAS around. It just wasn't diagnosed as easily and frequently and wasn't labeled. Trust me. I'm a teacher.

kcisthebombdotcom · January 2013

Estwd2:
jakstr0808:
Plus I don't find it hard to just not turn the tv on when they're around. For the record. I am also not really judging parents who let their kids watch tv. I only judge when parents say they couldn't not let them watch, like it's some monumental task to just keep the tv off.
I'm sorry we're not as good at parenting as you are.

Seriously!

I also think this is probably one of the few things that's easier with twins so her view is tainted. You need to do something around the house or yourself--your kids can sit in a baby proofed area for a few minutes and have entertainment/company from their sibling. When you have a solo high maintenance child going through the peak of separation anxiety--sneaking off to do something essential for a few minutes isn't as easy as leaving them in a baby-proofed area with a few toys. Not all kids are as good with independent play either. I was lucky with my 2 being naturally independent but not everyone gets that lucky. I definitely don't judge someone who needs 20 minutes to get something done and uses tv. Now if you're using a tv as a constant babysitter that's another issue altogether.

lana22 · January 2013

my 13 mo has never seen a kids show, but will occasionally be in the room when football/basketball is on. i am home with him during the day and the tv stays off. i saw that ted talk and decided i would do my best to keep him from tv, but don't freak out if we got to someone's house and it's on. he generally doesn't pay much attention to it anyway and if my husband is watching sports and notices that he's looking at the tv he'll pause it until his attention moves elsewhere.

letting your kid watch some tv doesn't make you a terrible parent. we weigh the pros and cons of everything and what works for some may not work for others. i'm lucky that i can control his television viewing and find other stuff to do, but i also don't have two other kids running around, morning sickness, etc. things may look different when i'm breastfeeding his little brother in a few months...

iluvmylab · January 2013

klibby707:
jakstr0808:
klibby707:
Booger+Bear:
TVs have been around for a long, long time, we all grew up with TV and so did some of our parents. Somehow we all made it to adulthood and are functioning just fine, so I'm not going to freak out about it. IMO it's something that's only a big deal on TB and for mommy wars.

Somehow, we all made it. You are right. :
If you watch the video in the link I posted, you will see they specifically talk about the differences in the television we grew up with vs what there is now. Remember how our parents generation were all about "there was no such thing as ADHD when we were growing up" well....it's super prevalent now. Not blaming it entirely on tv but if there's a chance why risk it? Babies don't need to watch tv. I've seen lots of people struggle with attention disorders and I think if I can do anything to prevent it, what's the harm. Also, to the poster who says they've seen the studies with mixed results....why would you chance it for the times the results were negative for the subject? Doesn't make sense to me. But to each their own i guess.
There are risks for a lot of different things. It's not like my kid is watching sponge bob. Studies change often too. The thing is ADHD WAS around. It just wasn't diagnosed as easily and frequently and wasn't labeled. Trust me. I'm a teacher.

And there wasn't billions of dollars to be made for pharmaceutical companies!

kcisthebombdotcom · January 2013

LalaMama81:
KC_13:
Estwd2:
jakstr0808:
Plus I don't find it hard to just not turn the tv on when they're around. For the record. I am also not really judging parents who let their kids watch tv. I only judge when parents say they couldn't not let them watch, like it's some monumental task to just keep the tv off.
I'm sorry we're not as good at parenting as you are.
Seriously!
I also think this is probably one of the few things that's easier with twins so her view is tainted. You need to do something around the house or yourself--your kids can sit in a baby proofed area for a few minutes and have entertainment/company from their sibling. When you have a solo high maintenance child going through the peak of separation anxiety--sneaking off to do something essential for a few minutes isn't as easy as leaving them in a baby-proofed area with a few toys. Not all kids are as good with independent play either. I was lucky with my 2 being naturally independent but not everyone gets that lucky. I definitely don't judge someone who needs 20 minutes to get something done and uses tv. Now if you're using a tv as a constant babysitter that's another issue altogether.
I know our opinions differ in this and we've done the tv and tech argument over and over. That said, choosing to use tv for those 20 minutes is a choice. You don't have to do it and it isn't the only way. I may choose not to use tv in that way, but that doesn't make be a better mother or a martyr. Just like it doesn't make you a worse mother for doing it. I really don't care if someone chooses to let their 18 month old watch a show so they can cook or shower or clean or whatever; I'm not even saying it's harmful. But to say it's unavoidable, the only way, you have to, etc. is simply not true. I feel like I have to do some stupid disclaimer like we are all happy and healthy and so were my pregnancies so we have no extenuating circumstances, but that should always be a given.

Actually, I mostly agree with you on the tv/tech stuff. I believe in very limited tv time for children, delayed exposure, and backround tv being harmful in large doses. I actively avoid technology for my kids. My kids actually just got their first toy that makes sounds when you press a button for christmas and most of the things in our house are wooden.

I just can't get it up to be judgmental to someone who feels they need 20 minutes of tv time for their kid (even if they're not 2+) to get through their day. I agree that if you're looking at it from a merely technical standpoint than yes, it may not be *necessary* but if it helps a mom get things that need to get done/helps her keep her sanity/helps her be the best mom she can be for the rest of the day I'd say it is "necessary".

I think depending on the personality/temperament of your child/personal circumstances (like if your DH works long hours/travels vs a 40 hour a week job) it's an easier feat to avoid tv than it is for others.

kcisthebombdotcom · January 2013

MRoss1982:
KC_13:
Estwd2:

jakstr0808:
Plus I don't find it hard to just not turn the tv on when they're around. For the record. I am also not really judging parents who let their kids watch tv. I only judge when parents say they couldn't not let them watch, like it's some monumental task to just keep the tv off.

I'm sorry we're not as good at parenting as you are.

Seriously!

I also think this is probably one of the few things that's easier with twins so her view is tainted. You need to do something around the house or yourself--your kids can sit in a baby proofed area for a few minutes and have entertainment/company from their sibling. When you have a solo high maintenance child going through the peak of separation anxiety--sneaking off to do something essential for a few minutes isn't as easy as leaving them in a baby-proofed area with a few toys. Not all kids are as good with independent play either. I was lucky with my 2 being naturally independent but not everyone gets that lucky. I definitely don't judge someone who needs 20 minutes to get something done and uses tv. Now if you're using a tv as a constant babysitter that's another issue altogether.

Sorry but this argument makes no sense at this age. I highly doubt Jak's twins are always perfect angels everytime she needs to do something around the house. They are still 15 months, even if there is 2 of them.

I didn't say they were necessarily perfectly behaved kids.

I'm saying when there's two they have the companionship of a sibling which can make walking away for a minute or two easier.

klibby707 · January 2013

faupanda:
MRoss1982:
KC_13:
Estwd2:

jakstr0808:
Plus I don't find it hard to just not turn the tv on when they're around. For the record. I am also not really judging parents who let their kids watch tv. I only judge when parents say they couldn't not let them watch, like it's some monumental task to just keep the tv off.

I'm sorry we're not as good at parenting as you are. 

Seriously!

I also think this is probably one of the few things that's easier with twins so her view is tainted. You need to do something around the house or yourself--your kids can sit in a baby proofed area for a few minutes and have entertainment/company from their sibling. When you have a solo high maintenance child going through the peak of separation anxiety--sneaking off to do something essential for a few minutes isn't as easy as leaving them in a baby-proofed area with a few toys. Not all kids are as good with independent play either. I was lucky with my 2 being naturally independent but not everyone gets that lucky. I definitely don't judge someone who needs 20 minutes to get something done and uses tv. Now if you're using a tv as a constant babysitter that's another issue altogether.

Sorry but this argument makes no sense at this age. I highly doubt Jak's twins are always perfect angels everytime she needs to do something around the house. They are still 15 months, even if there is 2 of them.
And this is why Jak is my hero!
OP- we don't let our DD watch tv either.  I am 22 weeks pregnant and I have not needed the tv to occupy her while I am feeling under the weather.  TV was a huge part of my life growing up, and I knew I didn't want that for my children.

It isn't a huge part of his either. Thanks for the input.

klibby707 · January 2013

jakstr0808:
klibby707:

There are risks for a lot of different things. It's not like my kid is watching sponge bob. Studies change often too. The thing is ADHD WAS around. It just wasn't diagnosed as easily and frequently and wasn't labeled. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
I'm not saying it wasn't around.  I agree with everything you just said.  But fwiw, I don't just trust someone because they're a teacher. 

I'm just saying that as a teacher, I know how overdiagnosed it is. You should have some trust in us. We raise a lot of kids :

klibby707 · January 2013

faupanda:
MRoss1982:
KC_13:
Estwd2:

jakstr0808:
Plus I don't find it hard to just not turn the tv on when they're around. For the record. I am also not really judging parents who let their kids watch tv. I only judge when parents say they couldn't not let them watch, like it's some monumental task to just keep the tv off.

I'm sorry we're not as good at parenting as you are. 

Seriously!

I also think this is probably one of the few things that's easier with twins so her view is tainted. You need to do something around the house or yourself--your kids can sit in a baby proofed area for a few minutes and have entertainment/company from their sibling. When you have a solo high maintenance child going through the peak of separation anxiety--sneaking off to do something essential for a few minutes isn't as easy as leaving them in a baby-proofed area with a few toys. Not all kids are as good with independent play either. I was lucky with my 2 being naturally independent but not everyone gets that lucky. I definitely don't judge someone who needs 20 minutes to get something done and uses tv. Now if you're using a tv as a constant babysitter that's another issue altogether.

Sorry but this argument makes no sense at this age. I highly doubt Jak's twins are always perfect angels everytime she needs to do something around the house. They are still 15 months, even if there is 2 of them.
And this is why Jak is my hero!
OP- we don't let our DD watch tv either.  I am 22 weeks pregnant and I have not needed the tv to occupy her while I am feeling under the weather.  TV was a huge part of my life growing up, and I knew I didn't want that for my children.

By the way, I wasn't simply feeling under the weather. I was sick from the time I woke up until the time I went to bed. I let him watch for twenty minutes here and there. I think sometimes being overly paranoid about everything can lead to bigger problems.

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